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July 10th "Timeloop"


Desato
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I felt like trying something different. This is an idea that I have toyed around with for a while. Enjoy!

 

The Timeloop

I have been stuck in a timeloop for who knows how many cycles. I am not sure exactly when it ends and when it restarts. I can remember my childhood. Around my 17th birthday, memories from previous lives begin creeping in. I have not been able to pin down any events that happen after my chronological 25th birthday. My best assumption is that something happens around that date and everything starts again. I assume that I go back to my birth or even some time before my conception. The events all seem to unfold in the same order until I turn 17 and begin to remember. At that point, I can affect my future and every subsequent lifetime. Each time this cycle repeats, I retain some amount of knowledge about the former "life", if you want to call it that. I began writing a journal at some point. I do not remember all of the entries. Nor did all of the lifetimes have a lasting impact worth remembering. I am writing this introduction to my journal in case this is my last time going through the loop. If somehow the journal persists past the end or time does not repeat again, someone may find the journal in the future and be able to make some sense out of it. My other journals are detailed logs about my research and such. Those will most likely be less useful since they have many many years of compiled knowledge. This journal is more of a log of events and will make much more sense to any interested parties.

The journal itself is somewhat fragmented. Right now I am chronologically 19 years old. What I learn during this year seems to be information that I retain into the next loop. Even then, I do not remember everything. I try my best to keep what I can in order to progress after the reset. I use this as a way to remember and hopefully have an impact on the future.

--------------------------------------------------------

Pass 19a.
School is basically a joke at this stage. Sometimes I try to have a normal life, but most of the time I just skip going once my memories start returning. I know there have been some run throughs where I had skipped schooling and others where I almost became a doctor. This go through, I am focusing on other things and just going to play the part of a regular guy. Obviously, my previous lives have shown that revealing my situation to my friends and family causes a whole host of other issues. I know I have kept a journal before, on at least two other occasions, but cannot remember the details of that. I am going to focus on retaining this bit of information for my next pass. Since I started regaining my memories at 17, I have been writing a journal and memorizing it for each year. I am 19 right now, so 19a sounds like a good title for this entry. So far I have also written 17a and 18a. I can recall more vivid memories from this year in general, so I think it might be the key to passing on knowledge. Age 18 seems to be the best for expanding my education. I will continue writing this journal each year until the reset.

Pass 19b.
I was able to rerecord my previous notes from 19a, or at least to the best my memory could serve. There were other bits that are fuzzy in my mind, but the couple of pages I wrote seem clear enough. I am sure after many loops, the record might start losing its integrity. I remember wanting to write a log each year for trying to memorize it, but only 19a made it. I am 19 years old again. I decided to work on education this pass. I have entered an MD/PhD program this time. It was interesting applying to places at 17 years old even though I did not have a history of academic achievement. There were many shocked faces when I was able to recite knowledge that someone twice my age would have difficulty comprehending. Even with the jump start, I will most likely lose a lot of that information. Hopefully I will at least solidify some of it from the past couple of years and progress more quickly next time. I am also attempting the notes each year again just to verify.

Pass 19c.
According to my previous notes, I was attempting to write one each year. The 19th year notes are the only ones clear in my mind. The 19a seems a little bit more clear than I remember it being last time. However, I wrote about having multiple pages memorized, but I only remember one page of the notes this time. Maybe after writing them a few times, it will become a solid memory. Sort of like how you can sing along with a song a few times and then remember the song without even thinking.

Let me write some more about the loops in case I forgot it in previous notes. From what I can tell, my childhood is always exactly the same. It is around my 17th birthday that I start becoming self aware. My mental landscape from previous loops fills in very quickly after that. Some time in between that point and turning 18 is when I reach my previous potential. I better cut this short, lest I forget it. This current pass, I am running a physical experiment. Each year I am cutting myself in a different place. Don't worry, it is nothing major, I just want a little scar to see what happens. The most likely scenario is that everything resets and the scars never existed.
List of sites: age 17: right leg; 18: left leg; 19: right arm; 20: left arm; 21: right foot; 22: left foot; 23: right foot; 24 and onwards I will repeat the order by adding a second, third, and so on.

Pass 19e.
Somehow I had convinced my parents to move to France last time in 19d. I remember that the notes were all written in French, but I do not remember the language and it all would have gotten jumbled. Instead, I will count that as a wash and go with what I recall from a, b and c. I assume I learned the language between 17 and 19 since I wrote all of the logs. Apparently, language is not counted as "education". Sometime I will have to test learning a language each year to see which, if any, transfers. The other experiment from 19c was the wounds. When I turned 17, I actually formed two scars on my left leg and one on my right leg. I was able to pass it off as an old childhood falling injury that nobody had noticed before. It might mean that my physical attributes from 17 and 25 years old might transfer. Of course, by the time I remembered this experiment, I was almost 18. I couldn't think of any physical thing to test other that hurting myself more. That would not prove anything worth damaging my body. Maybe when I turn 25, I will join a sports team or something.

Pass 19f.
I am going the MD/PhD route again. I still got to my third year. I feel like this time my first year classes really stuck. I assume in previous attempts that I do actually graduate college at some point. From vague memories, I believe I had entered college many times in past lives. Lets assume that it takes five times for my schooling to stick. Lets also assume that I was not pushing to skip classes or college all together as I do now. It might take around 10 cycles to progress a year. This would make sense considering I would have recalled some knowledge of my freshman and sophmore years before solidying my memory at 19 years old. That means spending 10 years on each of my junior and senior years. Considering I was not taking college seriously until the 20 most recent times I attended and that for a long time I was not even aware that I was trapped in a time loop, I could be close to 500 loops in. Since 25 is the longest I have been able to identify, I might be over 10,000 years old. I would love to explain how I am technically 10,000 years old to someone, while only remember one year at a time.

One more thing, I believe I did actually join a university sports club or team. It seems like it might have been track and field. When I reached 17 years old, my body started to get more lean without any change in diet. I am still currently more lean at 19 than I remember being before.

Pass 19g.
I managed to convince my parents that I needed growth hormone shots. After leaning out at 17, I really was smaller than most high school kids of the same age. Unexpectantly losing a bunch of weight was icing on the cake for convincing a doctor to agree. Having more years of education (over many lifetimes) than the doctor, for explaining away the situation, also didn't hurt. Secretly, I wanted to test the 17 year old physical properties experiment again. I used the GH shots for the rest of the year until I was 18 and then have been faking it for the past two years. I will feel really bad if this is the last loop and I wasted my parent's money. Chances are that this will come back around and they never spent the money. As much as it sucks having to relive my life over and over, it is a nice consulation prize that I can experiment without fear of reprocussions. I did gain some height for the few months that I was on GH. It is weird having memories from a different perspective. I am going to do track club again in a few years.

Pass 19h.
It is hard to tell, but it doesn't seem like the GH affected me for this pass. My memories from last time definitely had a good 1 or 2 inches on me currently. Also, at 17 I did not experience any growth spurt in the same manner that my scars appear out of no where. On the flip side, the track club definitely did have an affect. Maybe I worked extra hard since I was was taller last time. Right at age 17, I quickly got lean and toned. I had some muscle definition from the decreased body fat. It is nice now looking like I work out even though I have no recollection of doing so. This time around I decided to learn a different musical instrument each year. Tambourine, flute, violin, singing, clarinet, trumpet, guitar, piano, drums. If I remember some other instrument, that might imply that I reach past the age of 25.

Pass 19i.
It was the trumpet. So that means age 22 has something to do with musical acumen. Or maybe it is a left brain, right brain thing. Age 18 allows for left and age 22 allows for right. I am trying GH this time again. I am doing the even years: 18, 20, 22, 24, and so on (still assuming it goes past 25). I have a couple extra inches in height again. Track should be exciting.

Pass 19j.
I am finally in my fourth year of the MD/PhD program. The GH didn't work again. I will try odd years next time. I grew a runner's body fairly quickly. I am swamped this year with school, I do not feel like writing any more.

K.
GH round three. This times ages 19, 21, 23, and 25. There hasn't been much effect since I am memorizing this at the same time as taking the hormones. I should have taken measurements and written them in the notes from previous attempts. I am currently 5'3". But I think I might normally be 5'3".

L.
One of the odd years definitely stuck. I am currently 5'4". Right when I turned 17, I got a quick growth spurt. It was actually nice since I went the school route again. I am still short, but things are nicer being slightly taller without having to take the hormone shots. The only thing that sucks is that I am so skinny. I will see if my parents will let me workout with weights at 17 next time around since that year has some physical effects.

M.
I had started weight training at 17. I must be a "hard gainer". Leaning out so much from zero work must really kill my ability gain muscle. Here I am at 19 and have barely gained anything. I want to try the GH experiment again while just doing one year at a time. Then maybe I can double back and try again with weights. I got time to take it slow... All I have is time.

Q.
It turned out that 21 is the year that hormones have an effect. I am now 5'5" after having taken them in pass 19o at age 21. Ages 19 and 23 had no noticeable changes. Since starting with weights did not help much before at age 17, I may as well test age 25 this time around. This is strange, though. I know that ages 17 and 25 are both physical years from my testing many generations ago. I would have thought that weight training would be counted as a physical change. Joining track at 25 had obvious effects on body composition. I wonder how 17 is different.

R.
That worked to some degree. I am not frail skin and bones anymore. I was still able to get ahold of GH again at 17 and started working out immediately. I'm going to see if I can continue on GH all the way to 25 for working out. I will most likely not be able to continue getting prescriptions, but I'll find a way around it.

S.
I must have been a fiend in the gym. At 17, I sprouted up to 5'7". I was no longer a rail thin teenager. I have a vague recollection of some doctor's appointment when I was 5'5" and weighed 112 pounds or so in one of the previous cycles. Now at 5'7" I weigh 141 pounds. I was 5'3" before going through the changes and believe that it was meant to be my full height before all of this experimenting. I am still super lean from the lifetimes of running. The muscle packed on to my frame is pretty amazing looking. I might want to try this strategy again. There was a period in transition where I still seemed small at 17. If I can time it right, I should be able to get the growth hormone to use at age 21.

U.
Yep, that worked in 19t. The amount of muscle packed in must be affecting the bone growth with the GH carryover. They do say that your bones reform if you work out a lot. Mine must be building up longer and stronger with the muscle development. I am currently 5'10 and 173 pounds and somewhat wider than I recall. I was able to get GH again this round, but just barely. I was at the minimum threshold on size for a prescription. Any subsequent resets I will be growing too fast. As it was, I grew 7 inches and gained almost 80 pounds in a year. The doctors were patting themselves on the back for picking the "right treatment". If only they knew the truth. Since this is my last attempt with this, lets give it my best shot.

V.
Congratulations 19u, you killed it at the age 25 physical year. I now sport an amazing body. At 6'1" and 208 pounds, I am way more hunky than I ever thought I would amount to. At 6% bodyfat, I turn heads wherever I go. I am completely addicted to this growth. I'm on a constant high and just want to kill it in the gym when I reach 25.

W.
Surprisingly I gained another inch in height. The GH must have some carryover from previous cycles. With 227 pounds of lean bulk on my frame, I am raring to go for another reset.

X.
The results were not as dramatic this time. I did get up to 241 pounds and perhaps another half inch of height.

Y.
I did not gain any height from last time. It seems that the GH has finally run its course. I did gain another 10 pounds, though. I broke 250 and sitting pretty at 251.

Z.
Either something stopped me or I have reached the limit of this strategy. I am still 6'3.5" and 252. I look fantastic, of course. I can pick up anybody I want when I go out. It doesn't even matter - I can seduce guys and girls all the same. The only real concern I have is going back to university. I will no longer be unassuming. Being close to five feet tall, people treated me like a super smart little kid. Now I will be taller than most and yet still a 17 year old entering class with them. I think I should just focus on schooling for a while and just get it over with.

Aa.
I ran out of letters so this will be 19Aa. Next will be Ab. I started back up with my MD/PhD studies. I was able to knock out the first two years without any problems. This third year will also be easily managed. With 5 more years, where most of the time is just medical rotations, it should all be finished is around 20 cycles.

AbAcAdAeAfAgAhAiAjAkAlAmAnAoApAqArAsAtAuAvAwAxAyAzBaBbBcBdBeBfBgBhBiBjBkBlBmBn...

Pass Dx.
OK wow. That took much longer than I had previously calculated. It is really tough to judge the timeline before these notes. I do not retain all of the memories and the ones I do keep all blur together with no references. Through all of those years, I have gained another 12 pounds. No height change. With the knowledge of my education and the height/weight on my side, I had decided to run away from home right when the memories flooded in at 17. I wanted to attempt to start a life. Really, this is the first time I am trying to have my own life. I am sure I hurt my parents by just vanishing like that and they are probably searching, but will be looking for a 5'3" 100 pound teenager, not someone like me. I am over a foot taller and almost triple the bodyweight. If this endeavor fails, I can always go back. I have been looking into purchasing some hormone supplements. I am going to try it at age 21 again. If that doesn't work, I will have to set up more quickly next time and see if I can find one of those suppliers from pass '19g' or whatever it was. If that too fails, I am out of luck. I do not think I could get started any sooner than after the memories start and getting the prescriptions are out of the question.

Dy.
It turns out I was able to find something. Unfortunately I do not know exactly what I did. I know what I would try to do so I guess I will just be following that same path since it worked last time. I am now 6'5" 269. I had already repeated the self startup plan before knowing fully the results of last loop. I needed to be prepared quickly in case I had to get the hormones going earlier. This time I am trying both DHT and GH.

Dz.
6'6" 282. DHT also had an affect on secondary characteristics. I had always been fairly hairless. Now I have a little bit of body hair by the time I turn 18.

Ea.
Round 2. 6'8" 306. These hormones definitely have a strong cumulative affect. I should have noticed that in the early attempts at hormone treatment. I might just do one more round of both. My voice is absolutely lower than I remember. I do not have anything written about penis size, but it is bigger now. During some of my previous pass throughs, I seem to recall a few girlfriends telling me that I was below average. Gaining a foot and a half of height definitely requires more work on growing my cock to be proportional. Below average at 5'3" still looks proportional to my body. Average at 6'8" looks smaller since my hands have also grown in size. Part of me wants to take a lifetime off and see what people think of me now. The other part of me wants to just keep growing.

Eb.
6'10" 339. My muscles had practically burst off of me when I turned 17. My voice deepened to a sexy baritone as if I had a second voice change. My penis is currently 7 inches erect, this is my first note on measuring an erect length. I have a nice amount of body hair.

Ec.
7'1" 377. I should probably stop working out at age 25. After seeing myself, I decided to stop with the GH, although I'll probably still use DHT. I am loving the changes that come with that. My voice is deeper. I have an 8 incher and a generous amount of body hair. On second though, since there is carry over into other cycles, I think that is it for all hormones until I can see how they equalize.

Ed.
I guess i couldn't help myself - 7'3" ~410. Now that I am set up in my life, I should probably start working on this time loop problem.

Ee.
Ugh. 7'5" ~450. 11 inches. My entire abdomen is covered in hair. My pecs are also covered completely. My voice is much deeper than any male I have heard, not that I have heard many or remember hearing many. Note to self, resist the urge to play with hormones. It was actually quite painful growing to this size in under a year. I gained a pound a day, which is quite intense. Any more playing around could be at peril of our future selves. Oh, and now I have a full beard growing daily, thank you very much last me.

Ef.
7'6" ~460. I do not think my last self worked out, but it was all the muscle, bones, dht and gh settling. I am going to give home a try next go and see if I can get into grad school program to study quantum physics. I am sure it will brutal getting it done before my parents freak out about my changes. Since I'm going back to school next time, I decided to take a little vacation. I still did my startup plan at 17 and have spent the rest of the time sleeping around. I can get any guy and girl I want at any time. I can even have three ways, four ways and one five way orgy pretty much whenever I walk out the door. I ooze masculinity and people are putty in my hands. One word from my deep silky bass throat sends shivers down their spines. Stripping my shirt off and flexing my fur covered globes of pecs and brick like abs makes any girl wet and any guy cum in their pants. Seeing my 12 inch cock surrounded by tree trunk legs sends them into an orgasm frenzy. They continue orgasming all during sex and while worshipping my muscles. Even after they are completely dry and dehydrated, they still can't get enough of me as their hips buck wildly as they dry hump every part of my body.

I'll just call this my "spring break" pass through that lasted for 8 years straight. It sucks that I won't remember other 7 years. Of course, I need to prevent myself from getting any STDs in years 21 and 25 since they have been shown to carryover physical changes. It has been a wild past few years. A nice change of pace before buckling down to study.

Eg.
I was able to get into a school, but it was horrible. My mother was crying every day from me almost visibly growing in front of her. When the crazy body hair and other physical changes started happening, she had a nervous breakdown. Clothes that fit me would be torn to shreds within a few days. My father tried to manage, but very soon I was over two feet taller and three times his bodyweight (getting closer to four times his weight). He couldn't handle it and left my mother alone in the hospital. The heartbreaking part is that I will have to relive this series of events over and over. There is no way I could set myself up independently and get into grad school fast enough to learn things at 18 and memorize all of this at 19. Since 18 is my education year, things need to get going as fast as possible. If 19Ef held any bit of truth, I feel like I should just go back to living like that forever.

EhEiEjEkElEmEnEoEpEqErEsEtEuEvEwExxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Some time in the J's or K's or maybe even M passes.
I am not sure where I am in the timeline. I stopped bothering to mark the cycles after a while. I have a separate notebook where I was writing my dissertation. I never kept the dates on that one because it all just became too much to remember. My thesis on time-space distortions and time folding back on itself is 627 pages long. Luckily I was able to memorize about 20% of it and fill in the blanks from there over the next couple of years. It was especially rough having to pass my written quals, oral quals and my defense all within a year to retain it... and oh yeah, I did that somewhere around ten times, plus or minus a few times, for it to stick. Time to start applying all of that knowledge. I suppose I will just have to wow prospective employers with my expertise since this stupid degree won't exist in a few years from now. And hurray, somehow I have to get a job before the age of 19 in order to make progress on the problem.

MbMcMdxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It has been quite a while since I stopped marking cycles. Just like before the notes, time sort of bleeds together and I needed to concentrate on remember my research notes. My best guess would be a few hundred cycles, upwards around a thousand. I am technically around a hundred thousand years old. I feel so tired. The human mind is not made to hold thousands of years of memories. It just saps all of your strength. I remember being a happy teenager enjoying highschool and friends, and then I get smacked with all of this. I do not even appreciate my body any more. It just is so cumbersome. By the way, 8'4" ~600 pounds. The size causes so many joint issues, I feel like I have arthritis. When I turn 17, I basically just sob in pain for a year straight. I also remember vaguely a time when my 27 inch penis was enjoyable. Nobody can take it except for myself. And positioning it in-between my pecs to reach my mouth takes so much effort that I am out of breath before anything happens. I wind up just having to fuck these massive muscle tits. If I ever want to use it, it has to be done each cycle before I grow too big. I have body hair everywhere... I mean everywhere. And probably more bodyhair growing out of my bodyhair. My voice is like a deep rolling thunder vibrating everything in a house with one syllable. I guess a few times I got bored and started taking stuff at ages 21 and 25. And if that isn't bad enough, 10,000+ years of research and it looks like I cannot unfold my timeline. The best I could do is make it circular in reverse or skew the fold, shunting me into the multiverse. The theoretical outcome of either is much worse than what I currently have.

I guess I had a good life. My childhood was long and fun (and repeated tons of times). I had wonderful parents until they went crazy and got a divorce after I grew up. My college years were entertaining and lasted for a few hundred years - my grad school years a few thousand or more. I had the most fantastic body anybody has ever seen at some point in my life, before becoming this crazy monstrosity. I remember writing about picking up guys and girls so I had to have had lovers in there at some point. I never wrote much about it, but I would have only remembered a single year of it otherwise it would have been lost. Maybe my lovers were what prompted using hormones again. I do remember having a child at a few times, so I must have had a wife or something. And yes, anybody reading this, I do realize the implications that I was quite young and having children. However, I over the top hyper masculine - more of a man than anybody could ever dream of being. I suppose I never wrote about the children because I would never see them again. That is quite a sad thought.

That is my only real regret I have - only ever remembering three years of my life (and the childhood that repeats for 16 years in whatever is the current loop). It would have been nice to remember being twenty one and legally being able to drink. Or seeing 26 for the first time (if I can actually reach that age. I also wish I had spent more time experimenting before getting addicted to muscle growth. Maybe there was a hidden talent within the loop the could have made things better.

Pass Alpha.
The previous notes were a few thousands of generations ago. I can remember them clearly. I began experimenting again on myself around a thousand ago. Luckily none of my past selves decided to take hormone therapy further or else my body might have failed me. Gaining 500 pounds in one year is excruciating. It is practically 2 pounds a days without having to eat or work out.

I went back to school and received Ph.D.'s in theoretical physics, genetics, cell biology and physiology. I also got a masters in business. Of course the six secondary degrees mean nothing since I do not have a single diploma to show for it. After the theoretical degree, I spent a few hundred generations looking at the time fold problem. I still have not found a solution, but I did figure out a way to bring my mother in. According to her, the loops go at least to when I turn twelve. That is when she gains her memories from previous lives. By this point, she immediately divorces my father and raises me herself. After I reach seventeen, she goes off and travels the world. She also does whatever crazy scheme she comes up with.

She can memorize things in the fourth and seventh years of her loops - so when I am sixteen and nineteen. It is nice having the same year that we both remember. We always talk about her adventures and have a good laugh before she goes off again. She has even died on at least twenty different occasions and she always comes back. Very early on, we found her physical years to be her third and sixth. Just like with me, any physical changes stick. We made a pact that neither of us would do anything crazy in our physical years. That way we can always come back to each other. Being basically immortal has given her the freedom to try everything. She seems so happy now. I am sure that bringing her in was the right decision.

Since she receives her knowledge so early, she can start prepping for me to jump straight into my research when the time comes. Once she leaves my father, she invests all of her money into the stocks that have the highest returns. After a year she is always a multi millionaire and gets to work setting up a lab and hiring employees. They never know that their boss is basically a kid. This time loop is a great interview process getting free labor and 3 years of work evaluation. I just record my notes on the employees and memorize them at nineteen. If they are not working out, we do not even have to fire them. Everything just resets and they are not even hired in the first place. We have the perfect employees for the job now. They can get started and then kick it into high gear when I turn seventeen and recall a lot of their previous work. Each time we give them more and more starting information. Any time they come up with a new drug we can test it out for the next pass and then optimize. Unfortunately, because of my size, I have to interact with them remotely. The few times we tried introducing me, they either went insane or just lost themselves in lust for my body.

Pass Beta.
It has only been a few hundred generations since the last time I wrote in this journal. Though, I maintain vigorous notes in my research journals. Mom is still having fun. We've developed a few drugs for controlled release of GH and DHT. Now I have the exact dosage to control how big I grow. We also have localized hormone agonists. This allows me to selectively grow specific parts of my body. Or to be more accurate, I can select where the hormones will have no affect. In addition, we have discovered synthetic hormones that target muscles, bones, brain chemistry, etc. After many trials, I have found where I am happiest. I am six feet tall with an 80 inch chest and 20 inch waist. Normally those proportions would not be possible. However, I start as a frail 5'3" teenager. Though, technically you could say that my waist is 54 inches. My glute insertions are so high and lat insertions so low that they almost overlap each other. Once fully grown, the two muscle groups actually touch. In order to get an accurate waist measurement, I need to bend and roll my hips until the tape measure is wedged in there - good luck getting it out. It is nice having ass cheeks to lean back on when I am contemplating something. I also grow out my shoulder width to get past the 80 inch chest. That allows my arms to maintain full mobility instead of having my 30 inch biceps hindered by my pecs and lats. The wider shoulders allow my arms to hang almost straight down at the sides. My hips also had to be grown out to 70 inches around to allow my 40 inch thighs room to move without having to roll over each other. Normally someone with 28+ inch thighs has to have that bodybuilder waddling stride. I can walk normally at 40 inches.

Now that I am more manageable, I can interact with the employees. I am still a freak, but at a much more believable size than the giant from before. Most of them do not know my age. We, of course, had many trials to test their reactions. Eight of them are told about it and two have actually joined us in the loop. They now come straight to my mother upon reset and gaining their memories to help with creating and administering the drugs and raising me. They too have reaped the benefits. Both are rich beyond their wildest dreams and have the freedom to take off a cycle to go crazy whenever they want. From the stories they have told me, they make my 19Ef pass seem like I had a vow of chastity. The other employees are a little bit less productive when those two are not around, but we have time. We always have more time. We of course figured out their physicals and made sure that they do not die during those years. We do not know if dying is a permanent physical change and none of us want to find out the answer. Both they and my mom have taken the drugs (having a localized agonist is even more amazing for women). The hormones do not affect adults as much as teenager, but the three of them can pretty much choose their look each go. Three of the other employees learn about the time loop each pass and decide to take the drugs. It is crazy that the other 27 select not to do it. When we have convinced them to try it, they all request not to do it in the next cycle. The timeloop then resets and they never have to hear about it again. Ignorance is bliss for some people. As long as they keep producing results, it does not bother me one way or the other.

Pass Gamma.
It has been many thousands of generations. From what I can figure out in the research notes, possibly upwards around 350,000 years since the personal log - pass Beta... I have around 40 Ph.D.'s and Masters degrees. I have at least 10 M.D.'s in different specializations. I lost all generic memories a long time ago. I spend my brain's storage capacity on memorizing notes dating back a half a million years ago. It is silly that I write the 19a, etc., each time. It is so ingrained now that it does not make sense to leave it out. Luckily two things have helped. We discovered a wide array of drugs for memory and cognition. It is sad for the world that all of the neurodegenerative and muscular degenerative diseases will not be cured because of this time loop. Anytime we discover something, it vanished a few years later and has to get reinvented again. Even if we cured people with what we know, they would all reset to their previous state each time.

These drugs have converted our brains into super computers for the loops. We can all recite the countless research notes. And when I say we, there are now 34 of us in the loop - various people found during our travels. The lab is an entire campus with well over 2,000 employees. In that environment, even the original 27 that didn't want to know now accept the truth. Funny how people change their tune when things become commonplace. Get enough people to believe something and everyone will start to believe it. Every single one of the employees takes at least one of the drugs we have discovered. The entire process has become so streamlined that we have most drugs in production before I even become aware of the memories. The second event that helped was a drug that controls maturation. I am able to grow to 17 within two years after my mother regains her memories and starts the company. This unlocked a new memory year. I regain my memories as usual at 17 and all of the physical changes happen at the same time. My mother was able to memorize things in her 4th year, which is now when I turn 19. I am able to memorize things in that same year now. My mother's seventh year was when I was chronologically 19, but my accelerated maturation makes me 22. I am still able to memorize things during that year. I believe it is just a coincidence that my age is 19 during a memory year. Instead it seems like those years specifically within the time loop are significant as opposed to how old I am. Hormones affect me at age 21, still, which is chronologically my 18th year. The only difference is that I can remember that year now. Since I also grow at age 17 instead of the specific year, it seems like physical years affect you are a certain age and mental years affect you during a specific year. Now having 2 years to work in the lab before having to memorize research notes and then another 3 years of work before a second memory year has been tremendous for production.

I am now four feet tall and six feet wide. If I use my hands instead of my feet to hold myself up, I am instead 6 feet tall. I found out that legs expend a lot of energy and choose to halt their growth. I can squat a few tons with these short suckers, so don't think that they are completely unused. There is a huge benefit to having a 15 foot arm reach. I can basically operate an entire room of my lab without moving. Again, don't discount my arm strength because of the torque. I could lift a car with one hand and do one-armed pushups with the other stretched in the opposite direction. See, we developed a drug that condenses muscles. Say you had a 22 inch bicep. It would be condensed down to a six inch arm. You would look like skin and bones, but actually have more strength than you did before because of the super dense muscle. A 250 pound bodybuilder would weigh 75 pounds afterwards and be able to beat any strongman in a strength competition. My long arms are 32 inches around at the center of the bicep. Considering the 22 inch bicep condensing down to 6 inches, you can imagine how much strength a condensed 32 incher has. There was one time that we let me go for full growth. I obviously died within a few days from the intense physical changes. The next cycle, we tried it with a slower growth and extra drugs for bone and muscle elasticity. I did not reach my full potential, but the notes say that I topped out at 14 feet tall. I was completely immobilized at 45,000 pounds with 0.0002% body fat. My body was in such pain that they had to euthanize me. It has become comical when we die in a time loop. In the next cycle we all have a good laugh. Sometimes I feel bad that death means so little to us, but it has allowed us the freedom to experiment to our heart's content.

Using the condenser drug on my long arms, the biggest I have attempted is 80 inches around. By condensed, I mean they would be close to 250 inches if at full size. The strength was phenomenal, but the 80 inch size was cumbersome. I found myself knocking over things constantly in the lab. Obviously, we stunted the growth to over 100 inches before condensing down to 32. Like I said, with my arms completely stretched in opposite directions, I can do one arm pushups while holding a car. My condensed 100 inch arms could do much more than that, but there aren't many things around to test without possibly destroying them.

Pass Delta.
I have decided to attempt to die during a physical year. I am well over a million years old now. I have done all that I feel that I can do. One time I was leader of the world. One time I was 130 feet tall, weighing 5000 tons, and went around toppling cities. If you want something for comparison, I would be around 1,000 pounds at 6 feet tall and the same proportions. Another time I jumped to the moon. With advancements on our muscle condensing drug, we brought my 120 feet circumference thighs down to a measly 14 inches. My thunder thighs were bigger than a redwood tree, quite literally. The 14 inch version of my legs was more for the sake of mobility. I needed the quick burst of power to achieve escape velocity. I succeeded, of course, but it wound up collapsing California into the ocean and creating a tsunami that wiped out Australia from the force of the leap.

I have degrees in everything - and even a few degrees in fields that have not been invented, yet. I have a few thousand children that do not exist anymore. Even though I still remember it clearly, I never learned French again to translate 8d. I also never figured out what happens at chronological ages 23 or 24 in my timeline. I also haven't found out what happens in the missing years before my chronological 17th birthday other than the 2nd year after the maturation drug being a memory year. It is finally time to answer the age old question, if you die in a physical year, do you die permanently?

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If Dark thought me something is that he needs to break the cycle on his world meaning there is the origin world and what happened tehre to created this loop.

Amazing work. my Man

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I admire how this is a very interesting concept that hasn't really been done before, plus the descriptions of the growth was awesome. Overall, just got me thinking which is a cool change of pace! 

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