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Three Days of Archie: A Short Muscle University Story


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Following on from my "Ozzie & Deano" story, I've written another short spin-off featuring characters from my Deano and Muscle University stories. This one focusing on Deano's dad's girlfriend's geeky, regular sized son, Archie. 

It's in three chapters/parts and set over the same weekend as "Ozzie & Deano" so it ties in with events of that story.




Things I must not do today:

        1) Stare at Deano Junior’s pecs

        2) Stare at Deano Junior’s huge arms

        3) Stare at Deano Junior’s arse (even if he’s wearing those ridiculously tight skinny jeans like last time!)

“Are you actually going to TALK to Deano Junior today?” my mum asks me from the driving seat of her car.

I screw my face up. “I DO talk to him!” I say defensively. (To be fair - I don’t.) I look in the mirror to see my best friend Callum giving me a knowing smirk from the back seat. 

“Really?" my mum continues. "Or do you just stand there gawping at him looking all intimated?”

I can feel my cheeks getting flushed. 

“He’s not as scary as he looks, you know.” 

Callum leans forward and rests his chin on my chair. “Maybe Archie fancies him?” 

It’s dangerous to jump out of a moving vehicle, right? 

“If you don’t talk to him, I’m going to grab you by the ear and physically drag you over to him.”

Callum laughs.

“God - you would as well, wouldn’t you?”

“Yep!” mum says before she looks at me and smiles. “Just … ask him about uni or something!”

Yeah - because I’m sure my uni course will be very similar to Deano Juniors.

“Is it illegal to fancy your future step-brother?” Callum teases. “If you Google ‘I fancy my future step-brother’ will it flag up with the police?”

I can’t look at my mum right now.

“Do you need dropping off somewhere, Callum?” mum jokes.

Callum is right, of course. I DO fancy my mum’s boyfriend’s son. Otherwise known as Deano Junior (the boyfriend is Deano Senior). I mean - how can I not? He’s fucking massive! His chest. His arms. His shoulders. His arse. (Christ that arse.) And he’s only two years older than I am. It’s madness. Literal craziness. I guess that’s what happens when a) your dad’s an ex-competitive bodybuilder who owns the most notorious bodybuilding gym in Brighton (“Deano’s Gym” - I promise I’m not making this stuff up!) And b) you’re a student at Montgomery University of Bodybuilding & Fitness.

Literally ALL of those Montgomery guys are huge. I once went down a rabbit hole on Instagram checking out all of these bodybuilders who study at Montgomery with Deano Junior. Most of them massive. Some of them really fucking cute. All of them hot as hell.

This whole bodybuilder attraction thing is actually all my mum's fault. She used to compete in shows as a fitness competitor and me and my grandad went to a couple of her shows. So there I was, young and impressionable, hormones raging, trying to work out whether I fancied girls or boys and I was watching all of these obscenely huge bodybuilders strutting around in nothing but tiny posing trunks flexing their ridiculous biceps and showing off their crazy abs and I was sat there wondering why I’d never been more turned on in my life.

I mean - what did my mum THINK was gonna happen? 

It’s not a crush though. This thing with Deano Junior. Okay - maybe it’s a bit of a crush. But it’s not like I stalk him on Instagram or anything. I mean, I barely see him. This will be, like, the fourth time we’ve ever met. But when I DO see him, I usually spend the following few days thinking about him. A lot. My imagination usually starts getting a bit carried away. I start imagining all of these potential scenarios. 

Like - what if we started talking and found out that we actually had loads in common? That it turned out he’s a massive fan of the Marvel universe. And loves horror films. And then we became friends. And started hanging out. And then what if our parents split up, eliminating any weird potential future step-brother vibes? And me and Deano Junior stayed friends. And something started happening between us. And it turned out he was secretly gay or bisexual and was really into regular-sized ginger-haired geeky guys and not only did we have wild and mind-blowing sex but he also loved to cuddle for ages afterwards.

I’m not sure if I’ll be having those sorts of thoughts on this occasion though. Whether I’ll be thinking those things for the next few days, not least of all tomorrow. Because - well … I’ve kind of met someone. A guy online. Who I’m going on a date with and meeting in person for the first time tomorrow night. And you’ll never guess what? While he might not exactly be a bodybuilder, he’s not far off! 

“All right, Archie, mate?” Deano Senior says to me as I step inside his house. 

I won't lie - he’s a scary-looking bastard. And yes he’s got some muscle on him but his age and the fact that he’s my mum’s bloody boyfriend prevents my thoughts from going to certain places. (Because that would be REALLY fucking awkward.)

I’ve never quite known where I stand with him. He’s always been really nice to me, but I’m not sure if that’s just because he’s shagging my mum. Put simply - I’m not quite sure whether Deano Senior actually likes me. 

Terry introduces Callum, who she says Deano Senior might remember from his ex-wife’s wedding back in the Easter holidays. That time Deano Junior was wearing that suit. God - he looked so fucking hot in that suit.

“All right, mate?” Callum says cheerfully.

I smile and shoot a look at my best friend. In all the years I’ve known Callum, I’ve never known him to use the word mate. 

“Deano’s got one of his bloody mates from uni staying,” he tells us in a wary tone.

Wait - WHAT?

“I’m apologising to all of you now!”

My mum laughs. “Sounds ominous!” she says. Deano Senior shoots her a look and shakes his head.

Did I hear that right? One of Deano Junior's uni mates is here? Right now? There’s ANOTHER bodybuilder here from Muscle University? Who’s no doubt massive. Possibly one of the cute as fuck ones I’ve seen on Instagram. Most definitely one of the hot as hell ones. (Because they’re ALL hot as hell.) I need to fucking lie down right now.

I suddenly feel nervous as I follow Callum through the house and out to the back garden. My heart is actually thumping in my chest. How ridiculous is that? I spot the oldest son first. The one who looks like a Love Island contestant (and nothing like the two Deanos). And then … HOLY SHITTING FUCK. Those arms. Those bare shoulders. Those thick fucking pecs spilling out of the olive green vest he's wearing. Even the face is bloody hot. 

I’m suddenly staring at a pumped up, huge as hell, bonafide bodybuilder. And his name is NOT Deano Junior. This must be the friend from university. Jesus fucking Christ. 

“Shall we go and say hello to Deano Junior?” my mum asks pointedly with her eyes wide after Deano Senior disappears back inside the house to get the three of us drinks.

My stomach tightens as I follow my mum but, for once, it’s not the prospect of talking to Deano Junior (who’s looking both hot and adorably cuddly in a bright blue Montgomery University hoodie) that’s making me nervous. It’s the prospect of talking to his hot as fuck friend with the huge pecs, massive arms and purple mohawk (even THAT’S weirdly hot). 

Mum says all right to Deano and he introduces his mate as “Ozzie” and straight away I realise that I’ve probably already seen this guy on Instagram. Because that name sounds familiar. And now that I’m close up to him and his bulging mass and hot face I realise that he himself looks familiar.

“Yo, yo, yo!” he says in a thick Welsh accent. Jesus! As if he could get any hotter. Welsh accents are my number one weakness.

“This is my lad, Archie!” mum says.

“All right, Archie!” Ozzie says, his mouth curling into this sexy, teasing grin. It’s like he knows! Oh God. How does he know? 

“Archie’s off to uni in September.”

God, mum. Just stop. 

“Cool, cool, cool,” Ozzie says. He talks like a bit of a dick, but I’m SO fucking into it. With that Welsh accent, he can say whatever the fuck he likes to me.

Deano Senior comes over with our drinks. Mum asks Ozzie how long he’s staying in Brighton.

“Just until tomorrow.”

“How many hours exactly?” Deano Senior jokes, checking his watch. 

Ozzie just laughs. “Me and Papa D have got this banter thing going on. He loves me really!”

Papa D? What the fuck. I look at Callum who smirks at me. 

“First I’ve bloody heard about it!” ‘Papa D’ says. Deano’s mum arrives and Deano Senior and my mum disappear, leaving the four of us alone. Oh God. It’s me and Callum standing next to these two pumped up bodybuilders bulging out of their skinny jeans. How do they even get into those things?

“What uni are you going to?” Ozzie asks me.

Oh God. He’s actually TALKING to me.

“Oh. Ummm … Durham.”

“His first choice was Montgomery,” Callum jokes. Ozzie laughs in response. And Deano Junior smiles too. Deano Junior who I haven’t actually spoken to yet.

“Callum's going to Leeds,” I tell them, my stomach twisting. 

Callum bites his lip and nods. I still haven’t gotten used to that idea. I don’t tell them that Callum didn’t get into HIS first-choice university. That we were supposed to be going to Durham together. That that was the plan all along. For the both of us to go to university in Durham. Except … Callum didn’t get in and I did. All of this happened months ago and I still don’t think I’ve managed to wrap my head around it.

“What are you studying?” Deano Junior asks. But he’s not looking at Callum. I feel a flutter in my stomach. Because Deano Junior is ACTUALLY talking to me. 

“Oh, erm … English Lit.”

“I did a few Shakespeare plays at school,” Ozzie tells us. That completely throws me.

“What, like - acting in them?” Callum says, surprised. 

This guy in a school play? I can't see it. 

“Who were you in THAT?” Deano Junior asks.

“Romeo!” he says, with a shrug, like it’s obvious. Deano Junior rolls his eyes and smirks. I get the impression these two are really good friends. I feel a weird pang of longing and I don’t know why. 

“Huh. I don't remember Leonardo DiCaprio having arms like THAT,” Callum jokes.

God - I’d love to have Callum’s confidence. That ability to laugh and joke with lads this huge and hot like it’s no big deal. I envy Callum for his confidence. I guess I always have. 

Ozzie laughs at his joke. “I was a bit smaller back then, dude.”

“You were still a bodybuilder though,” Deano says.

“So - do you guys just get stared at wherever you go?” Callum asks.

Ozzie laughs again. How is Callum doing this?

“Pretty much!” Ozzie says.

I notice Deano looking at something across the garden. He’s doing this thing where he’s poking the inside of his cheek with his tongue. I turn around to see my mum and his dad embracing. My first thought is “gross”. But actually - it’s kind of sweet. I look back at Deano and he’s giving me this sort of knowing smirk. Like Jesus - how embarrassing are our parents? I smile back. It feels like a moment. 

And now I’m suddenly wondering how good it would feel to cuddle up to Deano Junior in his blue Montgomery University hoodie. Nope. Get that thought OUT of your head right now, Archie. This guy could be my step-brother one day. And now I’m thinking about someone ELSE I could be cuddling up to tomorrow. If all goes to plan. A thought which makes my chest expand.

I retreat inside the house to use the bathroom. When I’m done, instead of going back out straight away, I perch on the edge of the bath and get my phone out. I load up Deano Junior’s Instagram profile. And oh shit. There's Ozzie. In the very first video. It’s a retweet from seth_ozzie_osman’s profile. It’s him flexing topless on Brighton Pier. Bloody hell! It’s so fucking cocky and outrageous. I love it. And Ozzie. God - he’s so fucking hot. But I know it's a fantasy. That I could never get a guy like that. Not least of all because he’s no doubt straight. And even if he weren't, he wouldn't go for someone like me. My stomach feels heavy at that thought.

And now I’m on the Instagram profile of someone who’s NOT a fantasy - billy_baxter_biceps. The cute “wannabe bodybuilder” (according to his bio) who I’ve been chatting to for the past couple of months. The wannabe bodybuilder who I’m meeting tomorrow!

He’s uploaded a new picture since I last checked. He’s in his bedroom, wearing a white vest. His modestly sized biceps flexed (FUCK). His head tilted to the side. His tongue flat out. He does this pose a lot. It’s kind of a trademark thing I guess. It’s kind of douchey, but whatever.

He’s no Deano Junior. And he’s definitely no Ozzie. But he HAS got a bit of muscle on him. He’s got a decent physique. Toned. Pretty lean - but still built. His biceps are awesome. And he wants to meet ME! I still can’t quite believe it. But he thinks I’m cute. And seemed impressed with the fact that I know the Deanos from the infamous Deano’s Gym. And (as he’s written a number of times in his DM’s) he loves (and I quote) - “small, geeky lads like you (winky face emoji)”. “Like you”. Like fucking ME!

And I’m meeting him tomorrow night. I could potentially be kissing this cocky “wannabe bodybuilder” gym lad tomorrow night. Maybe even be feeling his flexed biceps. A thought now causing my dick to swell. Maybe (and I know this is my imagination REALLY getting carried away with me) even end up having my own wannabe bodybuilder boyfriend. Who’s cute. And funny. And makes me laugh. Someone I have loads in common with. Someone I can have film nights with. And cuddle up to while watching horror films. My very own secretly geeky wannabe bodybuilder boyfriend.

I go to the Messages app on my phone and compose a text.

Hey! Just saw the latest Instagram post. Nice guns! You never told me you go to the gym? 🤔😝

As soon as I hit send, my stomach crumples with regret. Ugh. It seemed cute and funny at the time I was composing it. But now I’m not so sure. Now I don’t think it’s funny at all. I stare at my phone, waiting - no, willing for Billy to reply. But nothing comes. He’s probably busy. He’s probably talking to a guy who’s smaller and cuter and geekier than me.

I lock my phone, compose myself and go to head back out, but something catches my eye in the bedroom next to the bathroom, to which the door is open. Oh shit. I step closer to the open door. This must be Deano Junior’s bedroom. And lying on his bed is a pair of the shiniest purple posing trunks. FUCK. 

Okay - so posing trunks are what bodybuilders wear on stage. Literally the ONLY thing they wear on stage. They’re so fucking hot. I can’t really explain why, but they are.

I know what I’m doing right now is wrong, but I can’t seem to stop myself. I’m stepping into Deano Junior’s bedroom and walking towards the shiny purple trunk material casually lying on the bed. Are they Deano’s trunks? Something tells me they’re not. I’ve never seen him wearing anything like these on Instagram. His trunks are always pretty boring.

I’m thinking these trunks belong to Ozzie. Purple to match the colour of his mohawk. Which makes me feel slightly less wrong for being so turned on by them. I can’t help wondering why he’s even bought them with him in the first place. To wear while Deano Junior films some content for Instagram maybe? Or do all bodybuilders just carry their trunks around with them wherever they go?

I’m now standing over the bed. Deano’s room has this kind of sexy smell to it. But these trunks. Bloody hell these trunks. So shiny. Sparkly even. It’s almost like they’ve got glitter on them. Do bodybuilders realise how gay these things are? I can't resist. I know this is wrong. So, so wrong. But I can't help it. I pick up the trunks and hold them in my hands. They even FEEL sexy. The straps. The pouch.

“What are you doing?”

FUCK! I practically jump out of my skin and drop the trunks on the bed. I spin around to find my best friend standing behind me. Thank GOD it’s just Callum. 

“Jesus, Cal!”

“What are THESE?” he says, casually picking up the shiny purple posing trunks. He looks so baffled. But he’s smirking too. Oh God. 

“Ummm. Bodybuilders wear them,” I say. I can feel my cheeks burning. “When they compete!”

Callum pulls a face. “Fetching!” he jokes. And then … what the fuck? Callum’s put the shiny purple posers on his head and I’m laughing in response. It’s such a Callum thing to do. “Take them off!” I cry, looking anxiously at the door.

He obeys, smiling and looking smug with himself. “What a boring bedroom!” he says, looking around and walking to the window. I follow him and look down to see everyone in the garden. The suspected owner of the sparkly purple trunks I've just been holding still looks unspeakably hot from this angle as he bulges out of his olive green vest. 

“So … are you like, madly in love with that Ozzie guy now?”

I roll my eyes. “Shut up!”

We grin at each other before we both look out of the window again. Me and Callum have been at school together for seven years. But we only became friends two years ago when we started the sixth form. I guess it was inevitable that the only two openly gay guys at school would end up being friends. I can’t believe we won’t be together next year. Not that Leeds is a million miles away from Durham, but the plan was that we’d be together. Me and him. Like it’s been for the past two years.

“Do you think they’re, like, together?” Callum asks.

I laugh. “No way!” looking down at the two outrageously hot bodybuilders in skinny jeans. “You don’t get gay bodybuilders like that. It just doesn’t happen.”

But as I say it, I realise that maybe I’m wrong. Because there’s a rumour going around that that AJ Jones guy is gay. And he’s huge. And jacked. And cute. REALLY fucking cute.

“So … excited about tomorrow?” Callum asks, referring to my date with billy_baxter_biceps.

“Ummm. Yeah.”

“Cool,” he says. But his voice sounds kind of flat.

“I mean … I’ll be nervous as hell. But …”

“Just be yourself. If he doesn’t like you, he’s an idiot.”

My chest flutters. I find myself smiling. I can’t seem to make eye contact with Callum right now.

“So … I think I might start going to the gym," Callum says casually. "When I go to uni.”

I smirk, not knowing if he’s joking or not. “Okay?”

“Imagine if I did. And we didn’t see each other for, like, a month.”

The thought of not seeing Cal for that long makes my insides clench.

“And then you came to visit. And I'd gotten, like … really jacked!”

Oh my God. I’m smiling. But I feel shy at the thought of looking at Callum right now. I don't know why.

“We wouldn’t really go a month without seeing each other, would we?”

My stomach tightens as I finally look at my best friend. He’s got this kind of weird but happy little grin on his face. 

“I dunno. I mean … you might make a new best friend in Durham,” he says, still looking out of the window.

I frown at him. But he looks over and gives me a teasing grin that tells me he’s clearly joking. 

I look out of the window again. How the hell DO Deano Junior and Ozzie get into those skinny jeans? 

“Arch …”

Something about the way Cal says my name makes me nervous. There's this seriousness in the tone of his voice. 

I look at him. Wow. He looks nervous. What the fuck is that about? I’m just looking at him. Waiting for him to go on. But before Callum has the chance to continue, we’re interrupted by someone. 

“Errr … what are YOU TWO doing?”

We both turn around to find my mum in the doorway of Deano Junior's bedroom wide-eyed. She looks like she’s in full-on mum mode.

“Get out!” she says in an urgent whisper. “You can’t just wander into people’s bedrooms!”

“The door was open!” I protest. 


“Archie was sniffing Deano’s shiny thongs.”

I want to die.

“Get out!” she whispers again as we file out of the room. As I’m trailing them down the stairs, my thoughts are firmly on what just happened with Callum. What the hell was all of that about? And what exactly was he about to say to me before my mum interrupted us?

When we step back out into the garden, my eyes practically pop out of their sockets. Ozzie, Deano Junior, Josh and his mate, who also looks like he belongs on Love Island, are all standing huddled together as Deano Senior stands in front of them holding his phone up. Oh - and Ozzie has taken his fucking vest off! 

I can’t believe it. I already knew how amazing his physique was from what I saw on Instagram earlier. But seeing him topless in the flesh is something else. His body is nothing short of phenomenal. These beautiful ab blocks that almost look cartoon-like. Like they’ve been moulded out of clay. And the pecs. Jesus Christ. Just so so thick. And striated (a word I don’t think I’d ever be able to say out loud). And they keep twitching. Making little movements. Like they’ve got a mind of their own. Like there’s so big they’re trying to decide what to do with themselves or where to go. 

“At least take your bloody hoodie off!” Deano Senior says to his son. He turns to me, mum and Cal as the three of us approach him. “I swear he bloody sleeps in that thing.”

Deano Junior rolls his eyes and does that cheek poking thing before whipping off his blue Montgomery University hoodie to reveal a black vest underneath which he’s bulging out of. I feel Callum’s eyes burning into me and I don't dare to look back at him. This whole thing is just too fucking much.

“Right, you bunch of dickheads - front double biceps!”

“Do you two lads wanna get in the shot?” Josh’s friend calls out.

“Don’t be a fucking dickhead, Smithy,” Deano Senior spits. I feel an unexpected warmth that my mum’s boyfriend just stuck up for me. Maybe he does like me after all.

I look at Callum, who’s smirking at me. He’s got this look on his face. And then … 

“I’m up for it!”

What the - before I have time to process my thoughts, Callum is whipping off his t-shirt and kneeling down in front of Ozzie as the group of lads laugh and cheer him on, and Ozzie says something along the lines of, “Get in here, Blondie!” which I guess is Callum. (God knows what nickname he’d give me!)

I can’t believe this is happening. Or maybe I can. This is one of the craziest things he’s done. But it’s still SUCH a Callum thing to do. I’m kind of taken aback at how toned Callum is. I’ve never seen him with his top off before. I’m guessing it’s from all the swimming he used to do.

And now they’re all flexing their biceps. Deano’s are fucking incredible. Ozzie’s are INSANE. The Love Island duo - meh. And then there are Callum's biceps. Okay - they’re not HUGE. But they’re definitely there. Modest little bumps of muscle bulging off his arms. Callum has biceps. How the hell does Callum have biceps?

“Sure you don't wanna join in, Arch?” my mum teases, leaning into me. I nervously look over, shoot her a look and fail not to smirk.

“Smithy - Callum’s showing you right up there, mate!” Deano Senior teases as he relaxes his phone and the guys stop posing.

A still topless Callum shoots me a look, a bashful smile on his face and my stomach does something unexpected. And then my phone vibrates in my pocket and I hear the ping that tells me I have a message. Excitement rises in my chest. Could this be who I think it is?

I nervously get my phone out. And yep. There it is. A reply to my text from billy_baxter_biceps.

Thanks geek! These guns need to be BIGGER. Maybe I’ll flex them for you tomorrow.

And now my insides are really going crazy. DEANO JUNIOR WHO?

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So, when’s Cal going hardcore? 😂

But great start, as always! I’m sensing there might be a long story to come out of our dear Arch in due course 😊

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10 minutes ago, Ozymandias said:

So, when’s Cal going hardcore? 😂

But great start, as always! I’m sensing there might be a long story to come out of our dear Arch in due course 😊

Flexing with the lads...making comments about going to the gym and getting jacked...I wouldn't rule it out! 🤪😅 Glad you're enjoying it so far, mate! 😊

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40 minutes ago, muscleaddict said:

Flexing with the lads...making comments about going to the gym and getting jacked...I wouldn't rule it out! 🤪😅 Glad you're enjoying it so far, mate! 😊

He definitely wants to be a bodybuilder and win Archie’s heart. By 2nd year he’ll be on-cycle, we both know it 😉

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Absolutely amazing start!! I love how we can almost feel the tension and conflict in Archie!! Once again MA, you’ve pulled us in and have us waiting on the edge of our bed for the next chapter! Keep it up! 

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3 hours ago, biggymnast84 said:

Absolutely amazing start!! I love how we can almost feel the tension and conflict in Archie!! Once again MA, you’ve pulled us in and have us waiting on the edge of our bed for the next chapter! Keep it up! 

Thanks for the lovey feedback, mate! 😊 It's only three chapters long so make the most of it (although it still took me a good couple of months to write). You get to meet wannabe bodybuilder Billy in the next one. 😏

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Great start introducing a new character!  I think Deano, Jr. will very  much be an afterthought to Archie, as in "Oh, him."

Good job as usual, @muscleaddict at developing distinctive characters with minds of their own!

With so much time devoted lately to the Deano family, it's been hard to conceive of any other personalities in this world.

Hello Archie and Hello, Callum!


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