Cole and Jake, part 4 - part 5 added 12/20/23

[Psuace]

The first 3 parts can be found on my page or in the Storyverse section.

 

I sit in the comfortable deck chair on the patio of my 2^nd story condo and watch the dull yellow disk of the sun rise up over the tall naked trees and mountains to the southeast of town.  I am wearing a grey Champion sweatshirt and dark blue sweatpants by Champion as well.  I also have on my soft fur-lined comfortable Eddie Bauer slippers.  I tossed on some ankle socks and my dark blue Duke baseball hat.  Jake had given the hat to me as a present 5 months ago for my birthday July.  The weather now is chilly bordering on cold.  The condo is warm, but I want to feel the chill, and experience a real late fall Saturday morning.  Clouds are gathering to the west and will eventually block the sun.  Precipitation of some sort is going to follow by mid, to late afternoon.  I’m not sure if it will be wet or frozen until it starts to fall.  The leaves are gone from the trees, leaving a naked landscape for me to look out over.  The park my patio overlooks is desolate.  I see a bundled jogger or two, but not many people are out so early, if 7:30AM is considered early in upstate NY, in early December.

I stare at the sky and feel a tear build in my left eye and roll out. It slowly slides down my face, along the side of my nose, to the top of my upper lip.  I reach my tongue out and wipe it away.  I can taste the sharp salt in the drop.  I check my phone again, even though it’s sitting face up in my lap.  I touch the side button and it comes to life.  I check the text icon, but do not see any new messages.  The phone icon does not show any missed calls.  I click it off, put it on the table in front of me, face down.  I extend my legs to the other chair on the patio and put my arms behind my head, interlocking my fingers.  I lean my neck back and feel some bones crack.  I sigh with satisfaction. 

I close my eyes and start to rethink what went wrong.  I feel another tear building, but focus on my thoughts and it subsides.  I was so happy.  Jake was happy too.  We were two peas in a pod; talking, laughing, and planning our future together, then it slowly fell apart.  I’m not sure if was really either of our fault, but it may have been both of ours. 

**

For three months after I moved here to be with Jake, life was great.  I lived with him and Nona. I worked remotely for 6 weeks for the old company, then was done, as I had agreed with my old boss, Chuck.  I had money socked away, so I could afford a little time off to find a new job.  Jake and I found the condo and I started to rent it.  Jake wanted to help, but I pointed out that he still lived on the estate and it may be a financial burden on him.  He wasn’t upset with me, but I could tell it didn’t sit well. 

I put my resume together and with Jake and Rose’s help, spread it around town.  I didn’t want another high-pressure financial consultant job, I wanted a lower stress job, but one that would keep my challenged.  Several offers came my way.  Jake and I discussed each of them, then I decided on a property management job.  It was perfect for a number of reasons.  Jake had finished his degree and wanted to get into the same field. We talked about working together, then eventually branching out and starting our own firm.  With his hands-on experience taking care of the mountain house and my business knowledge, we were sure we had it nailed down. 

Jake graduated from college in August, after finishing his summer classes.  I was so happy for him.  His family had a party and all his friends were there, including some of his ex-boyfriends.  I had met most of them, and was friends with quite a few of them thru our gym membership.  There was no jealously or hard feelings with any of them.  It was mid-September and Jake was all set to stop working at the estate full time and start his job at the same company as me.  Nona was excited for him and was actively looking for a replacement.  Jake’s parents had asked his brothers, Steve and CK if they were interested.  Neither really gleaned to the idea of working there.  CK had a nice full-time job in town and Steve was doing well with his part-time work as a contractor and EMT. 

Several local people applied for the job at the estate and Nona, Jake, and Jake’s dad conducted the interviews.  They had it narrowed down to three people and were set to make offers, then it happened. 

Nona had her first stroke.

Jake called me at the office.  He was at the hospital with her.  His emotions were running high and he was panicking, something I never thought I’d see him do. By the time I got there, the rest of his family was there, except for Jen and Tiny.  With Tiny, or Tim, being so young (7 yrs old), they did not feel it was right of him to be there.  Jen was watching him.  I had offered to watch him so Jen could be with the family, but she declined, saying they wanted a family member to stay with Tiny, just in case something happened. I understood.

I didn’t crowd the family.  I gave them what I thought was appropriate space.  I spent time with Jake when he wanted, or needed me.  If he said he wanted to be alone, I let him be, figuring he had stuff to work thru. When we were together, we’d go to the pond, usually late at night, and watch the moon and stars.  We’d hold hands and I would squeeze his to let him know I was there for him.  Normally I would put my head on his broad shoulders and he’d wrap his long muscular arm around me and pull me close. After the stroke, it was reversed.  I’d feel his head on my shoulder.  I’d wrap my arm around him and pull him close, reassuring him everything would be ok.  I’d kiss his mess of dark wavy hair and rub his thick thigh with my hand.  He’d cry, I’d cry, then we’d sit.  I’d carefully talk about Nona and ask if he needed anything.  Sometimes he’d answer, most of the time he did not.  I accepted it. 

I’d only known Jake for 6 months.  I didn’t know everything about him.  This was the first real test in our relationship. 

Even though I was not family, I’d been there enough that the nurses let me visit with her, when Jake did.  On one visit, before her second stroke, Jake and I were in the room with her.  She looked different, smaller, frailer, but when she spoke, the fierceness was still there.  I half expected her to climb out of bed, put on her flower print sundress, grab a wool sweater and her scissors, and head out to the flower garden to cut some late summer flowers for the room. During the visit she asked Jake to wait outside for a minute.  I was suddenly petrified.  Jake also had a nervous look on his face.  He slowly left, watching us the way whole until the door shut. 

Nona reached her bony arm out to me.  I approached and gently took it.  Her grip was still strong, but I could feel it failing.  She nodded to a chair and I pulled it next to the bed.  With all the monitors and wires hooked up to her, she looked like some weird science experiment.  She spoke with grit and determination, “Cole, I know I have not always been kind to you.”  I thought back to our first frosty meeting and how we treated each other.  “But I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks.”  She winked at me and I smiled softly. Her tone turned serious, “Be there for Jacob.  He’s going to need you.”  A sense of dread came over me.  She knew what was up, even though everyone else thought, or hoped she was getting better.  She caught the look in my eye and said, “I’ve lived a long life.  Jake’s Pappy is waiting for me.  I don’t want to go yet, but my body isn’t what it used to be.”  I squeezed her hand and felt a tear form.  “None of that Cole Patterson.  You need to be the strong one now.”  I saw a tear in her eye.  “Jake helped you when you needed it most.  Now, you must help him.”  I sniffed back a tear, but felt more welling up.  “He’s a Fischer, strong, proud, obstinate.  I think he gets it from me, but I’m not sure.”  I cracked the barest of smiles and so did she. “He will push you away.  You need to push back.  You need to push back hard and do what it takes to make sure he’s ok.” I nodded in understanding, not realizing the full extent of what would be needed. “Timothy was right about you.”  I looked at her not understanding what she meant.  She saw my confusion.  “Tim said, ‘You were the one’.  He means, you are the man for Jake.  You two are meant to be together.”  I blushed.  “It’s funny that Jake hasn’t figured out what he meant, whereas the rest of the family knew it the first time we heard him say it about you.”  I slowly nodded.

“Nona…” I went silent trying to think of the right words.

“Cole, it’s fine.”  Strong and resilient as always. “Just promise me you’ll be there for my baby.”  I nodded and leaned over to give her a kiss.  She gripped my forearm in gratitude.  “Please send him in.  I need to have a few words with him as well.  Maybe I’ll explain what Tim means.  Clear the fog from his head.”  She cracked a smile, as did I.

I left, found Jake, and sent him back in.  He was there for a long time.  I waited in the waiting room with Rose, CK, and their dad.  Rose gave me a hug as did their dad.  CK just nodded to me.  When Jake came out, his face was red and puffy.  Tears were still fresh on his face.  I jumped up and went to him, but he brushed past me and walked outside.  I turned to Rose and she immediately went after him.  Ten minutes later she sent me a text, ‘He wants to be alone.’   I reluctantly sent back an ‘ok’, knowing I should have pushed the issue, like Nona had told me to.

I drove home, waited a few hours, then sent him a text.  I asked if he wanted to meet.  He didn’t reply.  I sent another saying I’d be at the pond around 9pm.  I didn’t tell or ask him to meet me.  I just wanted him to know I’d be there.  It was our way of letting the other know we were there for them.

I pulled into the caretaker’s house around 8:30 and saw his pickup in the driveway. Knowing he was at least home, I started to walk to the pond.  I got there around 8:45, but he was not there.  I sat and watched the moon rise and arc overhead.  I listened the night critters sing their songs, hunt their meals, and talk to each other.  I drowsed, woke, then drowsed again.  When I woke a second time, I checked my phone and saw it was 10:30.  I was still alone.  He wasn’t coming.  I walked back to the house and saw his pickup was still there.  I let myself in and called his name.  No answer.  All the downstairs lights were off.  I moved slowly, turning lights on as I entered each room.  He was not downstairs.  I headed upstairs and started to check the bedrooms.  All were empty.  I even checked Nona’s.  As I stood there, I moved on a hunch and checked the hall bath.  There he was, sitting in the dark, in the shower, knees pulled up to his chest.  His face was still puffy and red from tears he recently cried.  I left the light off and moved toward him.  I opened the door, squeezed in, and sat next to him.  I didn’t say a word.  I put my arm over his shoulder and pulled him close.  He sniffled back some tears, then choked up, and the floodgates opened.

No words passed between us.  I let him work thru his emotions.  After an hour, he slowly stood.  I got up with him and we walked to his room.  He got on the bed and rolled onto his right side.  I got on next to him and wrapped my left arm over his body.  I spooned him and rubbed his hairy chest thru his shirt.  After a few minutes his breathing eased and he feel asleep.  I listened to him for a while, then drifted off as well.

I woke the next morning, still tired and worn out, but pushed it aside to be there for the man I loved.  Jake was facing away from me and his breathing was still measured.  I put my left hand on his left shoulder and softly patted him.  I didn’t want to wake him, but I wanted to make sure he knew I was there for him. 

I rolled out of bed, showered, cleaned up, and went downstairs to make breakfast.  About 20 minutes later I heard his boots clomping down the back steps.  I turned and waited for him to come into the kitchen.  When I heard the garage door open and shut, I didn’t know what to think.  I moved quickly to the door, pulled it open, and called to him, “Jake, I’ve made us some breakfast…if you’re hungry?”  He paused, didn’t turn, but shook his head ‘no’.  I felt a lump in my throat and a weight in my chest.  I walked out to him as he headed to his pickup.  He got in and had it started by the time I got to him.  I put my hand on the door and he slowly rolled the window down.  His eyes were puffy and red.  His face was pinched.  He had taken the minimal amount of effort to get ready for today.  He hadn’t showered or shaved.  I could smell a healthy dose of Old Spice body spray on him. 

He quietly said, “I have work to do at the big house.”

I stuck my right hand thru the window and put it on his left bicep.  He turned to look at me.  “Jake, I think the work can wait for a few minutes while you eat.”  He had a dull look in his normally bright green eyes.  I squeezed his arm.  I pleadingly said, “Please, just come in and have a bit of something to eat and drink.”  His chest expanded and contracted once or twice as he considered it. 

He reached his hand for the key and I held my breath hoping he’d turn the pickup off.  Instead, he reached for gear, shifted it into reverse, and started slowly backing up.  I quickly pulled my hand off his arm and watched as he backed up, turned the vehicle around, and headed up to the house.  The weight in my chest grew heavier.  I tried to sniff back a tear, but failed miserably. I stood there for a while, then went back inside.  I salvaged what I could of breakfast, even though I was no longer hungry, and put the rest in the fridge.  I went upstairs, straightened up his room, cleaned up the bathroom, and went back down to the kitchen. 

I grabbed a notebook, tore out a piece of paper, and found a pen. Knowing he would not respond to a text; I sat at the kitchen table and wrote a note to him.

Jake,

I cannot imagine how hard this must be, but I am here for you.  I want to give you the space you need, but please allow me to help you, the same way you helped me. 

I love you and always will.  Please reach out to me.

Cole

I read it twice, felt a tear form, and saw it drop on the page toward the bottom.

I left the note in a place I knew he’d see it and went out to my car.  As I got in, I sent Rose and his dad a text asking if I could meet with one of them.  I said it was about Jake.  His dad said he was at the hospital with Nona and could not get away.  Rose wrote back saying she could meet. 

We met in the park near the diner.  She looked a bit better than Jake, but not by much.  We hugged and sat.  She put her hands on top of mine and squeezed, the same way Jake would.  I felt more tears welling up. I softly said, “I don’t know what to do…”  My voice faded as tears started rolling down my cheeks.  I glanced up and saw the same thing with her.  “I know he needs some space…to deal with everything…but…”  She squeezes my hands again. “I don’t want to lose him.” I whisper. 

“Oh Cole…”  I glance up to see her eyes are moist, but she’s smiling.  “You’re on is list of the most important people in the world to him.”  I scrunch my face a bit.  “I’m sure you know the two people ahead of you…” I think to myself, ‘Tiny and Nona’.  I sigh heavily, grateful to hear this. She softly continues, “He got like this when Pappy passed away, but not this bad.  Nona is our last grandparent and Jake; well, he loves her fiercely.  I’ve tried to talk to him too, but he only gives me quick, simple responses.”  I nod knowingly.  “Tiny is asking for him and if he’ll come over to visit.”  I feel my body tremble with anxiety.  I look up and see the tears streaming down her face, smearing her make-up.  She cautiously asks, “I know he loves you, and is trying to deal with his pain, but could you try…to get him…to visit Tiny?”  She rubs her eyes with the heels of her hands, smearing the make-up even more.

I gather myself up, sit up straight, and confidently say, “Yes Rose.  I will go back to the estate now and force him to come with me.”  Her eyes brighten.  “Where is Tiny, at your parent’s house?”  She nods ‘yes’.  “Ok, give me an hour or so.  I’ll drive or drag him over, preferably the first.”  I shoot her a quick smile and she gives me one back. 

I get back to the estate and head right to the main house.  His truck is still there and has a load of branches in the bed.  I get out of my car, walk to it, then wander around the house.  I go around the side of the house, thru the flower garden, and out to the pool area.  I don’t see him.  I check the pool house and exercise room, not there. I continue around the backside of the house, to the dining room patio area and spot him.  He’s sitting in a wrought iron chair, staring off into the clump of evergreens that surround the 20 by 20 area for privacy. 

I walk up to him from the side, so I don’t shock him.  I put my right hand on his shoulder and squeeze.  He doesn’t move.  I move to the front of him and purposely get into his line of sight.  I squat down so we are eye to eye.  I use my left hand and lift his chin up so he has to look at me.  His eyes are still red and puffy.  I gently use my left thumb to wipe away a tear.  His look does not change. I mull over what type of approach I should use.  I make my decision.  While still looking at him, I forcefully say, “Fischer, get your ass up.  We’re going to your parent’s house.” He blinks a few times at my tone, but makes no effort to move.  I know I cannot move him on my own, due to his size and strength, so he has to want to come.  I continue, “Jake, Tiny wants to see you, and probably needs his Monster right now.”  That makes him look at me.  He sniffs back some tears, and sits back in the chair.  ‘Progress’, I think to myself.  “Come on big guy, this isn’t all about you.”  I wave my hands around.  “There are quite a few other people who love Nona and you, who want to help you, and” I emphasize the next part, “Need…your…help…”  I see him sigh. “Listen Fischer, we can do this the easy way, where you get up and get in my car willingly, or the hard way, where I get a fucking crane and lift your ass out of that chair and into my car.”  He almost smiles. “What’s it going to be?”  He sighs. “I promised Rose, I’d have you there in…” I check my Movado, “thirty minutes.  I doubt I can get a crane here that fast, so there is only the first option.”

He rocks forward and back in the chair.  On his next rock forward, he stands up.  I get up as well and reach for his hand.  He takes it and give it a squeeze.  He softly says, “A fucking crane?”  There is the slightest bit of sarcasm in his voice. 

I drive us over as quickly as I can.  My hand on top of his, squeezing it, and softly rubbing it.  He just looks out the window at the passing town. He barely says two words to me, but as we pull into his parent’s driveway, I hear him whisper, “Thank you.”  I smile. 

He squeezes my hand, then opens his door and gets out.  I stay in the car, hoping he’d turn and ask me to come in with him.  He doesn’t.  As he approaches the house, the front door flies open and I see Tiny come running out.  At the last second, he leaps up and into Jake’s waiting arms.  Jake pulls him in and hugs him.  I see tears in Tiny’s eyes.  He carries him back to the house.  I see Tiny look in my direction with tears still in his eyes, but a smile on his face.  I wink to him, not knowing if he’ll see it.  He waves back, and then is gone as the door shuts.

I drive back to my condo.  I get a text from Rose asking why I didn’t stay.  I respond with, ‘This is family time.’  She sends back a frowny face and says, ‘You’re family too.  You should come back.’ I ponder her statement.  I really want to see Jake and be there for him, but his family needs him more than I do.  If he wanted me to stay, he would have asked, or at least I hope he would have asked.  I begin to doubt myself and my instincts.  I write back, ‘Tomorrow.  Give everyone my love.’  I send the note and a heart emoji.  Within seconds she sends back, ‘Thank you.’ And a heart emoji as well.  A few minutes later I get another text from her, ‘I told Jake he needs to talk to you tomorrow. If he does not, I told him I’m going to go full Nona on him.’  There a winky face with the note.  I laugh to myself and hope he does contact me.

A day later, she had her second stroke.  His parents were there when it happened.  Word spread quickly and everyone was soon back at the hospital.  I offered to watch Tiny, but his parents said Tiny needed to be at the hospital.  I knew what that meant. 

Two days later, she passed away, after a third stroke. 

The funeral was four days later. 

I moved back to the caretaker’s house to be with him.  I wanted to share his bed, to be close to him, to help him in any way I could, but he quietly asked if I could sleep in one of the other rooms. At the funeral, I was holding Jake’s hand the whole time.  I would squeeze and hope he’d squeeze back, but he didn’t.  I could sense him drifting away, getting lost in his grief.  A week later, I found a note from him on the kitchen table.  It was lunchtime and he was still out working on the estate.  The note was short, but unfortunately, to the point.

Cole,

I love you so much, but right now, I need some space to work thru my feelings. 

I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me.

Please understand when I ask, but could you move back to your condo.

Jake

 

I read it again, then again. On the third time thru, tears were splattering the note, smearing the ink.  I wanted to scream, to ball the note up, go find him, and tell him to fuck off.  But I knew it would not do any good.  He had made his mind up.  I cried.  I packed my bags, and cried again.  I drove back to my condo and got there around 2pm. As I opened the door and turned the lights on, I could smell him.  His body spray lingered in the air.  His scent was in the carpet and pillows and towels.  I started to well up again, but forced myself not to. 

I was worn out.  I pulled a blanket off the bed, went back into the living room and lay on the couch.  I stared at the ceiling.  I picked up my phone and sent a quick note off to Johnny, “Hey, wanted to let you know, Jake’s grandmother passed away a few days ago.  He’s not taking it well.”  I hit send. 

A few minutes later my phone rings.  I hope it’s Jake, but see it is Johnny. “Hey Johnny.”

“Dude, you should have called sooner.  How are you doing?”  His concern is as clear as a church bell on a Sunday morning.

Of course, my emotions get the better of me now. I start to well up with tears, but manage to choke out, “Not good brother, not good.” 

“How’s Jake?”  Just as much concern for a guy he’s met a few times.

“I’m not sure…”

He cuts me off and angerly shouts, “What?!?”

“He’s shutting me out, Johnny, and I don’t know what to do…”  My voice fades to a whisper and the tears start flowing again. 

“Fuck this.  I’m on my way up.  Send me the address.”  He’s adamant.

“No, Johnny. It’s too far and by the time”

He cuts me off again, “Shut up Cole.  Just send me your fucking address.  I’m leaving in twenty minutes.”

I choke out a laugh and say, “Ok.  Be warned, it’s 4-hour drive.”

“Yeah, that’s what you think.”  And he’s gone.

I send him the address and get a thumbs up a minute later.                  

I recline on the sofa, turn on some soft music and pull the blanket up.  As I stare at the ceiling, I wonder what I am doing wrong?  I’m giving him his space, not pushing him to talk, not crowding his family, but he’s still shuts me out.  My breathing becomes ragged, I feel tears start to well up again.  I wipe my nose on my shirt.  I take some deep breaths and start to calm down.  I close my eyes and try to think of something other than Jake.    I focus on the soft 70’s music playing and let the sound wash over me.  It starts to carry me away. 

Next thing I know, my doorbell is ringing.  I hear Johnny call my name thru the door.  I slowly open my eyes and remember where I am.  I grab my phone and see I’ve missed three texts from Johnny and a call.  The doorbell again.  I call out, “On my way, give me a sec.”

I plant my feet on the soft beige carpet and put my hands on my knees.  I check the time and see it’s about 5:30. He did make it in record time.  I smile and go to the door.  As I open it, I sarcastically say, “Took you long enough.”  I give him a hug and feel his thin arms wrap around my back and pull me to him.  We stand there, in the doorway for a full minute, in our hug.  He pats me once or twice on the back.  When we part, I feel a bit better.  Some weight has been lifted.  He comes in and brings his overnight bag with him.

He launches into a tirade about the trip up as soon as the door shuts.  “These upstate people have no clue what a passing lane is, do they?”  I recognize this as a rhetorical question and let him continue.  I have a grin on my face.  “Left lane, passing lane; Right Lane, driving lane.”  I nod in agreement as I move to the fridge and grab some beers.  I pass one to him and he twists the top off.  We clink bottles and move to the living room.

I see him glance around.  “Pretty nice Colester, pretty nice…”  I nod.  “You buy or rent?”

“Renting.”

“Ok…Is Jake on the rental agreement?”  He looks out of the corner of his eye at me.

I whisper, “No.”

“Well, that’s something.” He says flatly.  I feel some anger boil up in me, but realize he is being practical and thinking about me first. “Job going ok?”  I nod. “Are you in touch with his siblings or parents?” 

I shrug my shoulders and say, “A bit.  I’ve talked to Rose about what’s up, but no one else.” Now it’s his turn to nod.  “I’m sure his family is asking why I have not been around much.  I’d really like to know what he’s saying to that.”

“Yeah, I’m curious too.” 

“Funny thing about this,” He says ‘hum?’, “His grandmother, Nona, told me he’d get like this and that I’d have to push him hard to get him to open up to me.”  I feel my chest tighten as I remember the conversation.  “I…I…still love him so much.  And, I get he’s depressed right now.  Ok, I was upset when my grandparents died, but I didn’t shut out the people who loved me.”  I take a breath. “Rose said he was the kind of the same when his Pappy passed, but not this bad.”  He lets me ramble.  “He and Nona had turned a corner.  She was accepting him for who he was.  Hell, she welcomed me into her house. Not sure that would have happened a year ago. And he was more diligent about his job on the estate and his classes.”  I sigh.  “He graduated in August.  Did I tell you?”  He nods yes.  “I was so happy for him.  He was getting ready to step away from the caretaker’s job and join me at the Property Management firm.  It was all set.”  I look down and see my hands are trembling.

“Life’s a bitch, Cole” My eyes snap up to meet his. He says solemnly, “’Best laid plans of mice and men…can still go wrong.’ Robert Burns, ‘to a Mouse.”  I roll my eyes at him. “Cole, roll your eyes all you want, but it’s true.  It sucks now, and probably will for a while, until he gets his head straightened out.  But, my friend,” He pokes me in the chest with his empty beer bottle, “you need to live your life.”  Another tear starts to form.  “When Jake is ready, he’ll come back to you, if you two are meant to be.  I just want to be sure you’re not waiting for him forever, cuz if he decides to call it quits, will you be prepared for that?”  He taps the side of my head lightly with his bottle.

I stand there and think about it.  He walks back to the kitchen, and I hear the fridge door open.  “JFC Cole, I know you can afford to buy some decent beer, what’s with this garbage?”  I hear him twist off two more caps and then walk back to me. He hands me a bottle and we sit on the sofa. 

I think out loud, “Jake has been my life for the past 6 months.  What would I do if we broke up?  Would I move back to the city?  Try to get my old job back?  Nah, not going to happen.  Stay here and be forced to see him, or his family around town, all the time?  Can I deal with that?”

We talk thru my questions for the next hour, drinking a few more beers along the way.  I look at the clock on the DVR and see it’s 7:30. I ask, “You hungry?”

“Does a bear shit in the woods?”

“Ok, let’s go.  I gotta place we can grab some good grub at.”  He nods as we both get up.  “You may need to double your run over the next few days to work it off, but the food is worth it.”  I clap him on the shoulder as we head out.

Ten minutes later we’re walking into the diner and I do a quick scan, but don’t see any of Jake’s family.  I breathe a sigh of relief.  Ronnie sees me come and has a big smile on her face as I approach. I make introductions, and she seats us at a back booth.  She leaves two menus and disappears to get some water.  Johnny scans the menu and then he sees it.  His eyes dart up, just over the top of the menu.  He coughs and shrug my shoulders.  He asks, “Is it any good?” 

My mouth starts to water. “You have no idea.”  He nods and folds up the menu.

Ronnie comes back with the waters.  We both order the Monster special and shakes.  She smiles, nods, then puts her hand on top of mine.  She gently says, “I’m so sorry to hear about Nona, everyone here is.  I hope Jake and the family are doing ok.”  I nod.  “Give them our love, will you?”

“Of course.”  I say without hesitation.  She walks away and I turn to see Johnny with a look on his face.  “I may run into one of them at some point.”  He shakes his head from side to side.

He starts talking about life in the apartment building, his job, his conquests (of which there have not been many).  We laugh and joke.  I ask about my apartment and he says it was rented within a week of me leaving.  I figured it would be.  The new people are just that, new.  Johnny doesn’t have a reason to come up to the 6^th floor anymore so he doesn’t know anything about them.   He still running and wants to do a few marathons at some point. 

The food arrives and we start to eat.  The burger is excellent as I expected.  The shake is thick with just the right amount of Oreo’s and chocolate.  Ronnie also left 2^nd cups with the extra’s from the mixer.  We are silent as we eat.  Johnny looks up from his burger, smiles, and nods with satisfaction.  15 minutes later we’re picking at fries and scooping the last few chunks of cookie bits from our shakes.  Ronnie pops by and checks on us.  I ask for the check. 

We pay and head out.  I take a meandering path back to the condo.  I show him the town, as much as there is to show.  We drive past my office, the gym, the local bar, and the park.  I decide to show him the estate.  I drive up to the gate, enter my code, and the gate still opens (thank God for small favors).  I take a slow drive up and point out all the features.  Johnny whistles and nods with a smile on his face.  He asks in his most mocking voice, “You spent a month here, and didn’t think to invite me up for so much as a weekend?”  I crack a grin, “Some best friend you are.”  He claps me on the shoulder. We pass the caretakers house, but Jake’s pickup is gone.  We near the big house and Johnny whistles again.  I pull to a stop at the front door and we take a quick tour.  He is impressed and checks out everything.  The view in the fading light is wonderful as usual.  He pulls his phone out and snaps off a few pictures. 

We head back to the condo. 

We talk some more, have a few more beers, and I can sense Johnny is veering the conversation away from Jake.  I feel better.  He’s still on my mind, but talking about other stuff helps.  After a while I let out a huge yawn and Johnny follows suit.   I get up and lead him back to the spare bedroom.  He drops his bag and opens it to unpack.

I head to the kitchen, put my phone in the charging station, and look up to see a photo on the fridge of Jake and I from his graduation party.  I run my fingers over his face, then pull it off the fridge, and put it into my junk drawer.  One less reminder, at this point. 

I head to bed.

The rest of Johnny’s stay flies by, but he helps me immensely. I feel the weight is lifted and I have regained some resemblance of control over my life.  He takes off three days later and makes me promise to call him, not text, but actually call him every Monday and Thursday, just so he can make sure I’m doing ok.  I nod.

A day later, I’m back at work.  I’m getting back into my groove, reviewing files, and setting appointments to have work done at locations.  If feels good.  When the day ends, I head to the gym for a workout.  I get changed and head out to the floor. It’s about 4:30, so there are quite a few high school and college aged kids.  They’re all on their phones and yakking it up.  I weave in and around them, getting on machines when I can.  I do a mish-mash workout of chest and shoulder, with some light leg work.  After an hour and half, my body is hating me, but my brain is on fire.  I’ve been listening to some Cage the Elephant and Linkin Park, just letting the lyrics wash over my body.  I decide to call it quits and head to the locker room. 

Then I see him.                        

CK is there getting changed for his workout.  I knew I’d run into someone from the family at some point.  I take a deep breath and when he sees me, his face lights up.  “Colester…dude, how’ve you been?  Miss you buddy.”  I smile and nod.  We bro-hug and his face scrunches.  “You’re kind of sweaty…Just finishing up?”

“Yeah, first workout in a few days, so I really went at it.  I’m sure I’ll be sore tomorrow.”  He gives me a knowing smile.  “But it was good.  Worked thru some stuff, so…”  I see his smile waiver.  “Not putting you on the spot, CK, don’t worry.” 

He sighs and says gently, “Not sure what’s up with Monster.  We’ve all been asking for you, but he is eerily silent.”  Now I feel uncomfortable and shift my eyes from side to side.  He catches it.  “What are you doing Friday night?”  I shrug my shoulder as I don’t have plans, but have a feeling I may in a minute.  “Ok, I’ll talk to Rose and Steve and see if they want to meet up for a beer.”  I fidget a bit.  “Don’t worry, Monster won’t be invited.  But the rest of us still want to see how you are.”  I sigh and think it may be a good idea. I nod ok.  His smile becomes wider and he claps his hands together.  “Great.  I talk to them tonight and get it set up.”  We come together for another bro-hug and he says, “We’re on your side and don’t want to lose you as a friend.”  I hug him a bit tighter.

For the rest of the week, I concentrate on work and working out.  I get back into a routine, and it becomes natural again. 

Friday comes and goes.  Meeting with Rose, Steve, and CK was nice.  They were all very happy to see me and wanted be sure I was ok.  I assured them I was.  I remember to tell them Ronnie from the Diner says Hi and passes on her condolences.  We had a few a beers, talked, and enjoyed each other’s company. Jake did not come up a whole lot, much to my surprise.  Rose said Tiny was asking for me.  She said she told him I was away for a bit, but would visit when I got back.

**

Days turned to weeks. Weeks passed and the normalcy of living without Jake became…normal, but not comfortable.  I still met with Rose, Steve, or CK every so often, just to keep in touch.  I kept in contact with Johnny too.  I went home for Thanksgiving and visited my parents, brother, and sister.  They were woefully inept about not talking about Jake and my move. 

**

The chill has definitely turned to cold.  I get up from the deck chair and my body feels frozen.  I go in and get a quick shower before heading out to meet Steve and Tiny for lunch.  I asked we not meet at the diner, just for something different.  And because Ronnie knows something is up between Jake and I, and I don’t want to have to rehash it.

As I let the warm shower water wash over my body, I’m happy to see I’ve kept off any depression weight and am still making gains in the muscle area.  I’ve made a few friends in the gym and several have mentioned how fit I look.  I’ve checked out some guys and talked to a few.  I’m not sure what the proper protocol is with this.  Am I allowed to go out on a date with another guy?  Am I holding on too long to the thought that Jake is coming back to me?  It’s been 4 months and nary a peep from him.  His family says he’s been really depressed, but has gotten better.  I want to blurt out, ‘then why hasn’t he called or at the very least, texted me, to let me know he’s doing ok?’, but hold my tongue.  This may be a Johnny conversation on Monday.

I get to the restaurant and see Steve’s pickup in the lot.  I head in and see them in a corner booth.  Tiny sees me and his face immediately brightens.  Mine does as well.  He gets out of the booth and runs over to me.  He doesn’t jump up, like he does with Jake, but grabs me around my waist and hugs me fiercely.  I pat him on the back.  He releases his hug.  I squat down and we hug again. He whispers to me, “I’ve missed you a whole lot, Cole.”  I pat his back a few times. “I wish you’d come over.”

“We’ll see Tiny.” Is all I can manage.

We head to the table and Steve and I shake. I sit and glance over the menu.  Although I’m hungry, nothing on the menu jumps out to me.  I’m still studying it when the waiter comes back.  I ask for an iced tea and a few more minutes with the menu.  He nods and heads off. 

Tiny smirks at me and says, “Tough to decide when there’s no Monster Special listed.”  I snort and nod in agreement.  He then innocently asks, “What would you say if there was a Monster here?  Would you get it?” 

I look over to him because the way he says this is just a bit different.  I see him look past me.  I freeze suddenly grasping what he means.  My body shakes with nervousness.  I slowly turn my head and spot him out of the corner of my eye.  He’s just coming thru the door with CK.  I freeze again and quickly turn back to Steve.  He has a half smile on his face and nods down to Tiny, indicating it was his idea.  I realize I’ve been holding my breath and exhale. 

They’re half way to the table and my sense of ‘fight or flight’ kicks in.  I could get up and walk out, and nobody would probably blame me, but then, I’ve waited for this day for too long to let it pass. 

Jake and CK get to the table.  I can see Jake is just as surprised as I am.  The twins start to move away and motion for Tiny to come with them.  Tiny doesn’t move.  They begin to reach for him and Jake gives them a look letting them know Tiny can stay.  They quietly move to a different table to give us some space. 

Before Jake or I have a chance to say a word, Tiny speaks up and his own way spells it out to us, “You two need to talk.  I tried and Nona tried, but you just wouldn’t listen.”  We both glance at him, then back at each other.  He looks the same, but has probably dropped a few pounds.  His face looks slightly gaunt.  I can see the beginnings of dark circles under his eyes.  His beard is not trimmed, nor is his chest hair.   His hands are under the table and he’s not making eye contact with me.  I lightly place my hand on the table.  The waiter comes back with our drinks, but sees the situation has changed.  Tiny politely says, “Monster will have a water and I’ll be over there” He points to Steve and CK “when you come back with my water.”  The waiter seems flustered for a moment, but nods his head, and walks off.  Tiny stands up, looks at both of us, and quietly says, “You were meant for each other.”  He walks over to Steve and CK and sits with them.

Well, here I am.  The man I love is right in front of me.  We won’t be allowed to leave until we’ve talked.  He’s still looking down.  He’s wearing his baseball cap, backwards, as normal.  There are a few tendrils of his wavy dark hair sticking out.  I want to reach over and curl them around my index finger and tug on them gently.  His boulder shoulders are sagging a bit.  He moves his hands from under the table to the top.  He sighs and I see his fingers are shaking.  I reach over to him and put my hand within reach of his.  I softly ask, “How are you?”  He shrugs and I hear him sniffle back a tear.  “Jake…” I hope he’d look up, but he doesn’t.  With a bit more force, I say, “Jake, it would help if you looked at me.”  He slowly lifts his head and his face is puffy and red.  I instinctively reach for his hand.  He does not pull away.  My thumb rubs against his knuckles tenderly.  He lets out another sigh and glances up to me.  I crack a smile.  “Hey, how are you?”

He quietly says, “Well, you know…”  then fades to silence.

“Um, actually…” I whisper the next part do I don’t sound too much like a douche, “no, I don’t.”  I grip his hand a bit firmer.  I lean to him and say, “You see, my wonderfully great, outstandingly funny, monster of a boyfriend is going through a really rough patch, but he won’t talk to me or let me in to help him.”  His eyes glisten over.  “I’ve tried calling, texting, yelling, cuddling, waiting…but he…” now it’s my turn to well up.  “I don’t know if he loves me anymore…”  I feel a tear roll down my cheek. 

I glance away, then look back. He’s looking at me, his green eyes sad and forlorn.  I feel him put his other hand on top of mine.  “He does.” Is said very quietly. “And he wants you back, but isn’t sure if he’s ready…or if you’ll have him given everything that he’s done…or not done.”

I grip his hands, rub them again, and am determined to make some headway with our situation.  He’s still…‘fragile’ doesn’t seem accurate, but I cannot really place his emotional state.  I’m happy to hear he still loves me, but am not happy with being shut out at a time when he needed me most.  I get that everyone deals with the loss of a loved one in different ways, but excluding your boyfriend, who only wants to help and support you, is upsetting.  There are other choice words, that I’m sure Johnny would use, but those won’t help me right now.  I look at Jake, he’s worn out, exhausted, depressed.  I roll an idea over in my head and decide to toss it out and see what he says.  I squeeze his hand again, and begin, “Hey lover-boy,” He looks up into my blue eyes, “what say you and I blow this popsicle stand, and go to the pond for a bit?  I raise an eyebrow to him.  I see the slightest of grins.  “You, me, the wildlife, and the chilly wintery afternoon.”  A slight nod.  “There is one thing…and you must agree to this, or it’s off.”  He pulls back just a bit, but I grip him and don’t let him move further. Now for the make-or-break condition, “You need to talk to me.  I want to know what’s going on up in that pretty head of yours.”  He sighs.  I react and quietly say, “Jake, man, I love you.  I want to help, but you gotta let me in.  I’m not asking for full access in our first sitting, but let me help you…please…”  my voice fades and I release his hands.  I keep mine on the table, because now it’s his move.

He sits back, slumps in the booth, and turns to look out the window at the encroaching gray afternoon.  His chest expands and contracts with his heavy breathing.  A minute later, he turns to me and softly says, “Ok.”  My face brightens and I want to lean over and kiss him, but I keep my hands where they are and sit still.  I need him to make the first move.  He slowly moves his left hand to my right.  He turns his hand over and slides it under mine, we join them together and I feel him apply some pressure.  I smile and return it.  He smiles a bit.

I turn to the table with Steve, CK, and Tiny.  They all look at me with smiles and hope.  I nod slightly.  They all exhale at the same time.  Steve and CK ‘high-five’ each other.  Tiny slips off his chair and comes over to us.  I raise a finger of caution and he comes to stop.  I slip off the bench, walk to him, and squat down. “Tiny, I’m very happy you got Monster to come.” I give him a hug.  As I lean back, I continue in a more serious voice, “He and I have a lot of stuff to work thru.  It’s going to be a long road for us.”  He nods with understanding, but I hope he knows what I mean.  I look over the twins and give them a nod.  They nod back.  They get it.  I stand and lead Tiny to Jake.  “Jake,” He turns to look at me.  I see some color has returned to his face. “I’m going to head to the condo and put on some warmer clothes.” I check my watch and say, “The pond in an hour.” He looks at his, turns back to me, smiles and winks.

I turn and start to head out.  I see the waiter coming towards me.  He frowns and asks, “Everything ok?” 

I clap him on the shoulder and happily say, “Yes sir, I think I just got my boyfriend back.”  I turn and see his brothers are in the booth with him, but he is watching me.  I wink, turn, and walk out.

I get home, check the forecast, and decide on some winter boots, a heavier coat, gloves, and a knit hat.  I also fill a Yeti thermos with some hot water and grab some tissues. 

As I head over, I’m singing along to a Death Cab for Cutie song on the radio.  I take my time and don’t speed thru town.  I know where the local speed traps are.  I get to the entrance to the estate and enter the code.  The gate slides open and I slow drive up the road.  The view is very different from the spring.  All the Maples, Oaks, Willows, and Birch trees have lost their leaves.  Only the Pines and Yews have foliage.  I can see for quite a distance in all directions, but the pond is out of view.  I see some deer in a meadow on the right side of the drive.  They look so peaceful and at ease munching on the dying grass.  I pull into the caretaker’s house and see Jake’s pickup.  The garage door is open.  I go up to the door and knock.  I don’t want to be presumptuous and just walk in.

I wait for a minute and knock again.  I hear his boots on the steps.  A moment later the door swings open and there he is, my rugged mountain man.  All bundled up in a dark gray Carhatt Yukon winter jacket, which looks snug on him. Matching gloves and Brown Timberland Greenstride original Waterproof boots, size 13.  He’s got a knit scarf and is pulling on his ever-present baseball cap, brim to the back, a few tendrils of his wavy dark hair sticking out the front.  He’s shaved and trimmed up his beard.  I smell his Old Spice body spray, through all the layers of clothes.  I feel a twitch and want to jump him right now, rip everything off him and well…, but realize that won’t happen for a while.  We have too much baggage to work thru.  I feel underdressed in my Under Armour Legacy Sherpa jacket.  But I did put on a pair of long underwear to keep everyone nice and warm down below.  Guessing Jake did the same.  He’s got a backpack slung over his right shoulder.  It’s bulky, so I guess he has a blanket in it and some other stuff.

He catches me staring and winks.  I blush.  I jokingly say, “Just like the first time, in the woods, so long ago…”  He smiles and I can tell he is thinking back to the day.  He nods and moves to join me in the garage.  He pulls the door shut and we head out of the garage.  He punches the code in and shuts the door.  I lock my car and we head out. 

As we head across the road to the path, I stretch my left hand out and he takes it in his right.  I just hold it and let him make the first move to squeeze.  He does and I sigh to myself.  We walk the beaten path and watch rabbits, field mice, deer, and birds scatter as we near them.  We get to the pond about 10 minutes later and the one thing that strikes me right away, is the lack of critter noise.  If this were summer or even early fall, we’d be hearing frogs, crickets, owls, and doves all singing their songs.  Now, it’s just the wind blowing thru the bare trees.

We sit on the wooden bench, Jake to my left, as usual.  I sit close to him, but leave some space.  I pull out the thermos and pour some warm water into the lid.  I offer it to him and he takes a sip.  I do as well.  We sit for a bit and I feel the cold breeze at my back.  It tickles the exposed portion of my neck. 

He starts off by very quietly saying, “I’m sorry.  It’s the best I can offer right now.”  I let the words flow over me.  He squeezes my hand.  “Nona…was everything to me…even when we were not getting along…”  I think back to the first time I met her.  Her presence and demeanor would make the strongest person quiver.  She ruled the estate with an iron fist and Jake was definitely intimidated by her.  He cowered and submitted to her demands, even though he has one of the strongest personalities I know.  “For a number of years that I worked at the estate with her, I was not living my life as I wanted, and I resented her for that.  I thought she was embarrassed by my being gay, but it went deeper than that.”  I sit and listen to him open up, gaining a profounder respect for his relationship with Nona. “You know, it wasn’t until I met you and saw how open and…free…you were with being gay, that I decided to have a talk with her.” 

I turn to look at him and see his misty green eyes looking at me.  I see gratitude and a hint of a smile.  I gently say, “Everyone’s situation is different.”  He nods. “I was out for years, like you, but was not…hindered…by my family.”  He gives me a little shrug of his shoulders.  “Not to say, you lived in a cave, but from what you’ve told me, you kind of kept being gay to a ‘need to know’ basis cuz you lived in such a small town.”  He looks at the ground and nods.  “Jake…” He looks at me again.  “You saw were I lived.  Nobody gives a fuck if you are gay, straight, bi, or painted green with bright blue hair.”  He laughs at the image. “I dated hot men, ugly men, women who dressed like men, men who dressed liked women, and some other very weird people, but you know what we all had in common?” 

He nods his head up and down and says, “You didn’t give a rat’s ass what people thought.”

“Exactly.”  I squeeze his hand.  “I get small town life, even if I never lived it.  Everyone knows everyone.  Everyone is in everyone else’s business and won’t hesitate to gossip and spread rumors, just for fuck’s sake.”  He cracks another smile. 

He says, “I had to live the ‘I’m gay, everyone knows it, but we don’t talk about it’ life, and I think that’s what bothered Nona so much.”  He sighs. “When I confronted her, we had quite a stare down and I let it out that I’d been with plenty of guys in town and there were quite a few who nobody suspected were gay, or at least like to walk on the ‘wild side’ every so often.”  I raise an eyebrow with a ‘do tell’ look.  He sees it, cracks another smile, and shakes his head.  “Maybe later.”  I smile.  “That’s the day we really turned a corner, gaining a deeper respect for each other.  She said she’d try to be more accepting of my lifestyle, and quite honestly…”  he goes silent and I see a few tears form, he whispers, “she was…”  He sniffles back some tears and snot.  I pull a tissue out and hand it to him.  He turns and blows. 

I put my hand on his muscled thigh and give it a squeeze, not making a dent, but getting my point across.  “At least you had the chance to clear the air with her and start a new chapter.” 

He smiles and says, “The dinner you came over for,” I nod, “was the first time she’d allowed me to bring a ‘friend’”, he airs quotes the word, “over.  She went out of her way to make you feel comfortable.  I knew she still wasn’t crazy about the idea, but after dinner…” I remember how that night ended, “she could see how much we cared for each other, and she told me as much.” 

He goes quiet and looks out over the partially frozen pond.  I look as well and see snowflakes have begun to fall.  It’s very light at this point.  Jake reaches into his backpack and pulls out a dark green blanket and spreads it out over both our legs.  I pour more warm water into the Yeti lid and offer it to him.  He takes another gulp and so do I. 

He reaches his right arm around my shoulders and lets it sit there.  He’s letting me know it’s now my turn to make a move.  He’s made the effort and has opened up to me, more than I expected, for which I am grateful, but I know we still have a way to go.  I inch closer to him.  His arm comes down on my right shoulder and I feel him pull me a bit closer.  He can feel his body relax and he sighs.  I rub his leg again.

We sit and watch the snow start to fall a bit harder, but make no move to go back to the house.  He says, “Nona loved the winter.  Decorating for the holidays, having family parties, and just watching the seasons turn.  She’d sit in the sunroom on a snowy day for hours, just watching the snow accumulate.  I’d want to go out and plow and shovel, but she’d say, ‘There’s no one at the estate, it can wait, come sit with me.’  We’d sit and she’d talk about my Pappy and the life they lived.”  He’s smiling and just looking out over the meadow. “This place was their life for so long…” his voice cracks.  I rub his leg as he pulls me closer to him.  “I knew it was, but to me, they were a maid and a gardener.”  I sigh knowing where he's headed.  “When my dad asked me to help out when Pappy died, my first thought was, ‘I’m a glorified gardener and my life is over.’”

“Oh Jake…”

“I know now…but five or six years ago…man, I wanted to finish college, get my degree, continue to work out and do fitness competitions, but it was put on hold, again…”  I hand him another tissue.  “I guess that’s where I started to rebel a bit against Nona…meeting guys as I did jobs around town.  I’d have some quickies during the day when I should have been working.  She knew.” I laugh, knowing he’s right, “She always knew.  When we had the talk, she brought it up, not throwing it in my face, but letting me know she knew and how upset she was that I took advantage of my job to do it.”  He leans back, tilts his head back as he looks up into the snow.  “I guess that’s when I realized what the job really meant to her and to Pappy too.  People in town didn’t think we were better than they were, but we were the ones who took care of ‘the estate’.”  He snorts and laughs.  “Nona always called it ‘the estate’.  It was never the big house or anything else, always ‘the estate’.  Now I get it.”

He goes silent.  There is a calm with the snow falling and the fading light.  We continue to sit. 

After a while, he hugs me again and asks, “Ready to head back?”  I nod.  We get up and shake the snow off ourselves.  He folds up the blanket and puts it back in the backpack.  He reaches his left hand out to me and I take it. 

We get back to the caretaker’s house, I guess it’s his place now, and shed our wet, snow-covered coats and outer wear in the garage.  We head inside and he turns on the TV and flips to the local news, looking for the forecast.  It comes on and they say the storm should dump 8 to 10 inches overnight, then be gone by morning.  He turns and asks, “Want to stay here?  It may better than trying to drive home over partially plowed roads.”

I know he’s only concerned for my safety, which I appreciate, but I need to take a stand at this point.  I mull it over for another minute and say, “Yes, I’ll stay, but on one condition.”  He raises an eyebrow and gives me a snarky smile.  I see it, let out an audible sigh and sarcastically say, “Just the opposite big guy.”  He gives me a confused look.  I take his hands in mine and explain, “The condition is, we stay in separate bedrooms.”  I wait for the fallout, but he is silent, just staring at me. “I still love you, Jake, but I don’t feel right about sleeping together at this point.”  I whisper, “I hope you understand.”  I release his hands. 

He immediately pulls me into a hug.  His big strong arm clenching my body to his.  I can smell his sweat and body spray.  I force myself to think other thoughts so I don’t pop a woody.  After a minute he releases me.  We look at each other and he tenderly says, “Cole…given all I’ve put…” he pauses, thinks, and quietly says, “I understand.” I breathe a sigh of relief.  He then says with the confidence I know him to have, “I hope one day, we can get back to the way we were.” I smile.  “I know it will take time, and that you have set up boundaries to protect both of us.  I respect that.” 

He hugs me again. He leans back and has a sneaky smile on his face.  “Who’s making dinner?”

I laugh, pat his muscular chest, and say, “Your house.  I’m just a guest.”  I turn and head to an oversized wing-back chair with a yellow and red floral print on it.  I sit, grab the remote, and casually say, “Let me know when dinner’s ready Monster.”  I look at the TV, but shift my eyes toward him.  I see him smile, shake his head, and head to the kitchen.  I turn the sound up a bit as he starts to rattle some pots and pans. 

Twenty minutes later, I smell some very flavorful aromas wafting thru the air.  I hear him pull out some plates and silverware.  I get up and go help.  He gently pushes me away and says, “No, no, no…you’re the guest.  I’m the host.”  I put my hands up and take a step back.  “Dinner will be ready in 5 minutes.  Not sure if you’d like to go freshen up.” I see him give me the once over.  I nod and head to the bathroom.  I run some warm water, dampen a cloth, and quickly wash my face, neck, and hands.  I emerge feeling relaxed.

Jake’s moving platters and pots to trivets on the table.  I help and he does not stop me.  We sit to eat.  I ask, “May I say a few words of thanks?  I know we’re not the most religious guys in the world, but I’d like to get some things off my chest.”  I see some tears forming in his eyes.  He nods slightly. 

I close my eyes and say, “To whatever omni-present being is watching over us, I want to thank you for bringing Jake into my life. I also want to thank you for bringing Nona and the rest of his family into my life. The pain I was going thru before I met this man was palatable. I didn’t want to continue.” I feel Jake’s maw of a hand cover mine and squeeze. “You stepped in using Chuck, who allowed me to come to this Eden of a sanctuary to heal myself.  The month I spent repairing my body and mind, and finding real love for the first time, changed my live and my direction.”  I sniffle a bit. “Jake’s family has been wonderful to me.  My relationship with Nona grew and flourished.  I’m a bit upset you took her away from us.”  He squeezes my hand again. “I’m hoping she’s found peace and is with Pappy.”  I open my eyes to see tears spilling down his face.  “Did Nona tell you what she said to me when I was alone with her in the hospital?”  He shakes his head ‘no’.  “Oh…”  I quietly say, “She told me to be there for you, regardless of hard you tried to push me away.”  I glance up to him.  “I tried Jake. I really tried…But you pushed me away harder.  For weeks, I…”

He quietly interrupts me and says, “Cole, it’s ok…”  Tears well up in my eyes and start to fall.  “I know I pushed you away.  I’m sorry.”  He squeezes my hand again.  “You want to know what she told me that same day?”  I smile and nod.  “I know she told you she’d clear the clouds from head and explain what Tiny’s message meant, you know, ‘He’s the one’.”  I nod.  “Well, she also told me she approved of you and thought you were the perfect guy for me.”  Tears just flow down my face. “She also said she knew she was dying and there was nothing anyone could do to stop it.  That hurt me…so…much.”  He gets choked up.  He takes a sip of water and a few deep breaths.  “Like you, I’ve never been the most religious person out there, but I felt that God, or who-ever is in charge, yanked a rug out from under me for absolutely no reason, but to fuck with my life.”  Now it’s my turn to squeeze his hand and let him know I am here for him.  “I looked down at her that day and knew she was not coming out of that room…alive…Cole, it killed me.  Here I am, 6’1”, 230lbs of muscle and bravado, but I couldn’t help my 95lb grandmother in her time of need. I felt…useless…I retreated and…”

Now it’s my turn to interrupt, “Jake, it’s ok.”  We’re both flushed and red.  “I know it’s no consolation, but she knew her time was coming.  I think…she had made…peace with it.  And, we’ve started on our path back to each other.”  He quickly nods in agreement.  I look to the sky and jokingly say, “Well, omni-present being, what else you want to throw at us?”

The lights go out.

Jake says, “Really Cole.  You just HAD to challenge him?”  He starts to laugh as do I.               

 

** Two weeks later ***

 

It’s a few days before Christmas and I’m debating on whether to travel to Philly to spend the holidays with my family or stay in upstate NY with Jake. 

Over the past few weeks, he’s really opened up and talked about how Nona’s death impacted him.  We are back to talking every day.  We’ve taken quite a few trips to the pond.  This seems to be the best spot for him.  We’re away from prying eyes and he can let his feelings come out.  I always bring extra tissues and a thermos of warm water.  The snow has continued to accumulate and there is a good 2 feet on the frozen ground. Gratefully my Volvo is AWD and his pickup is front wheel drive. 

I’m back to work and back to the gym.  He’s back to the gym and has been interviewing people to help him out at the estate.  His parents sit in on the interviews.  Jake wants to get someone on board before the New Year, so he can start the training.  He’s still looking to step away but knows it’s his job until suitable replacements can be found. 

He heard from my old company that a family will be up for the holidays, from December 21 thru January 2.  We both know this means a lot of his time will be spent preparing the big house and making sure everything is in tip top shape.  I’ve offered to help, but he declines, and lets me know he appreciates my offer.

I have not moved back in with him, nor has he moved in with me.  We are ‘okay’ with still living apart.  We’re closer, don’t get me wrong, but until we both feel the time is right, we agreed to live apart.  This also means we have not slept together.  Trust me on this on, it’s getting tougher for me to keep my thoughts and hands off him.  His body is back into his normal shape: muscular, toned, and hard as granite.  He keeps his hair and beard trimmed. The dark circles are gone from under his eyes.  We are back to working out together and sometimes Steve, CK, or Tiny will join us. 

With Tiny’s pee-wee football over, Jake makes special trips to his parents’ house and takes Tiny out on Saturdays or Sundays to give his parents a break. Usually, it’s just the two of them doing stuff, but occasionally they will invite me along.  These days almost always involve snowball fights, building forts or snowmen, or sledding down the larger hills on the estate.

If I’m not invited, I will try to explore the surrounding area, for both work and personal knowledge.

It’s December 19^th and my mom has called for the third time in two days to see if I’m coming down or not.  I keep putting her off but know a decision will need to be made.  I send Jake a text and ask him if he’ll be free tonight.  I want to talk to him about it, prior to making my decision.  I don’t hear from him right away, which I take to mean he’s busy cleaning and getting the big house ready for the guests in a few days. I get back to work.  Funny how busy we’ve been in the last few weeks.  Lots of work to be done on the properties we manage.  Gratefully, our maintenance staff does a wonderful job.

Around 2 I get a text from Jake.  He says he’s sorry and that he’s been running around the estate getting last minute items cleaned up.  He says he can meet up for dinner, if it’s at the caretaker’s house and doesn’t take too long.  I respond, “Ok, I can grab some food from the diner?  Want me to bring a change of clothes and help you out?”  I look at me response once I’ve sent it.  I wonder if I’m over-stepping any boundaries wanting to help?  A minute later he sends back a thumbs up and smiley face emoji. He then says all the work will be around the house and pool area.  This gives me an idea of what to grab, clothes-wise.

5:30 later I’m pulling up to the big house.  His pickup is parked in the circle.  I see debris in the bed and some boxes near the front door. I go in and hear the vacuum running in the dining room. 

I see he has decorated the house for Christmas.  He’s got lights on the indoor plants, Poinsette’s, and Christmas Cacti spread around the floors and table.  There are nick-nack decorations on tables and the stairway going up to the bedrooms has a couple large Nutcrackers.  There is garland wound around the banister.  I step into the kitchen area and can see a twenty-foot Vermont White Spruce in the sunken living room.  It’s completely decorated and has white lights on it.  I see a 6-point star at the top.  I walk over and see it’s a real tree to boot.  There is a dark green apron around the bottom of it with a silver interwoven pattern along the edge.  I whistle to myself and think, ‘I came up at the wrong time of year.’

I see a mop in the kitchen and rags on the granite countertop.  I grab a rag, a can of dust cleaner and move to the sunken living room.  I start wiping down the end tables, leather sofa, and pictures.  I grab a dry mop and sweep the hardwood floor.  I also dust the walls and corners, removing any cobwebs.  I move to the kitchen, wipe down all the counters, clean the glass cabinet doors and the brass pulls.  I wipe the refrigerator, stove, and microwave.  I see the dishwasher has been run.  I put everything away.  I check the inside of the fridge and freezer and they look fine. 

I hear the vacuum turn off, but Jake does not come out.  I’m guessing he’s dusting and cleaning all the furniture in the room.  I yell, “Hey Jake, I’m here.  I cleaned the living room and am now in the kitchen.”

He yells back, “Thanks.  Be down in a bit.”

I continue to clean.  I move into the pantry and check the food for expiration dates.  Everything seems ok. I wonder if the guests sent a list of food items they’d like to have.  I make a mental note to ask Jake. As I’m bent over sweeping some dust bunnies into a dustpan, I hear a sexy growl behind me.  Jake says in a low tone, “Nice ass.  Bet you could bounce a quarter off it.”  I flex the cheeks just to hear his reaction.  He whistles. 

I stand up, turn, and see he’s wearing black nylon exercise shorts, a skintight dark green tank top, and Asics sneakers. There is a sheen of sweat covering his body.   I feel a tingle down below but try to put those thoughts out of my mind. I stumble over my greeting, “Hey…”  I see him give me the once over and smile.

He takes a step closer and runs the fingers of his left hand thru my shaggy blonde hair.  I’ve continued to let it grow out. Can almost put it into a ponytail but may need another month or so.  His fingers feel good.  The touch is not the same but hoping we can get back to it.  “Nice to see you.”  I nod.  “Thanks for your help.  I knew how much work there was to get the house ready for guests, but never really knew 'how much work there was’.”  I pat his muscular forearm in agreement.  “Not sure how she did it all by herself.”

“Well, she had a fantastic grandson to help her.” I wink and he blushes.

“Yeah, be that as it may, but it’s still a lot.”

“Do you have much more to do tonight?  I’ve got the food in the car.  Wasn’t sure how long you’d be.  I can run out and grab it if you want to eat here?”

He waves me off, “No, no. Just about done in the house.  The pool is closed, but the hot tub is still open.  The workout room is good to go.” I can see him doing a mental checklist in his mind. 

He pauses and I say, “The house looks really nice.  I love the tree and decorations.” He smiles and nods.  I ask, “You do it all yourself?” 

He flinches a bit.  “Well…” I think, ‘Here it comes.’.  “Truth be told…Nona always had a service come in and do the decorating.” I chuckle. He smiles again and says, “Why mess with a sure thing?  It only took them a few hours to get it all done.  They also left me a set of instructions for the tree and a number if anything happens.”

I pat his steel pecs and say, “I’m with you on that one.  Anyway, they do a great job.”  He nods.  “If you’re good for the night, want to head down and have dinner?” 

“Absolutely. I’m starving.”

We head out.  He locks up the house and we take the short drive down.  After we park, he opens the garage door, and we head in.  I stop dead in my tracks.  He takes a few more steps then, stops and turns to me.  He has a puzzled look on his face.  I quietly say, “Jake, you have not decorated?”  He sighs a very heavy sigh.  I walk to him, wrap my arms as far around his back as I can, and give him a hug.  He easily wraps his arms around me and hugs me back. 

I hear him sniffle a bit.  His voice is trembling, but he says, “I wanted to Cole, I really did, but…I couldn’t.”  I hug him tighter. “The memories of her are in each ornament, wreath, or string of lights.  I had gotten a box or two out of the basement and was looking thru them, but…”

I try to console him and gently say, “You should have called someone, Rose, Steve, me?”  I take a chance tossing my name in the mix.  “Any of us would have been here in a heartbeat to help you.”  I hear him sniffle again and he breaks the hug.  I look at his reddened eyes.  “Jake, you’re not alone in this.”  He nods.  “Ok, you get the dinner ready.  I have to use the men’s room.  Give me a few minutes.” 

I head to the hall bath and shut the door.  I quickly send Rose a note asking if she’s free tonight and can she come the house and help Jake do some decorating.  I wait a minute or two and she responds that she’ll be there in half an hour.  I send a thumbs up and heart emoji.  I flush the toilet and wash my hands. 

I head to the kitchen and see he’s plated up the food.  We sit and begin to eat.  He asks, “So why did you want to meet up?  You had a question?” 

Now it’s my turn to be tentative.  “Well…my mom has been texting me to see if I’m coming to Philly for Christmas…”  I glance at him.  He eyes look sad.  I say, “I haven’t given her an answer because I didn’t know where we were…” I move my left hand between the two of us “and I didn’t know if you wanted some alone time with your family.” 

I look away, but when I look back, he’s still staring at me.  I see a few tears on his cheeks.  He reaches his right out to my left one and softly says, “You’d give up Christmas with your family…to stay with…me…after everything?” I shrug my shoulders with indecision. “Cole, I don’t know if I have the right to ask you to stay.”

I say, “That’s just it…If you asked me to stay with here with you…I would.”  We both go silent.  “I know this year will be hard for you.  I want to be here for you…if you want me to be here…for you.”  I’m rambling and repeating myself.  I need to shut up.

He sniffles again, then says, “If you’re asking…then, yes, please stay.  I’d love for you to be here.”  I feel his hand grip mine tighter and a weight leaves my heart and shoulders. He lightens the mood by saying, “Plus, I’m sure Tiny would be very upset if you were not here.”

I roll my eyes and sarcastically say, “Yeah, I’m sure.”  Knowing he is probably half right. 

The rest of dinner takes a much lighter tone.  He asks me about how my family celebrates the holiday.  I go into detail about some of the Patterson traditions.  Some he enjoys, some make him cringe.  I laugh at both and say, “Ok, wise guy.  I’ve told you mine, you tell me some of yours.”

Just as he’s about to begin, we hear some cars pull into the driveway.  Doors open and shut.  There’s a half knock at the door from the garage and it opens.  Rose steps in with Tiny and CK behind her.  Tiny is all bundled up in his dark gray winter jacket and knit hat.  He starts shedding layers as he walks toward us.  CK puts a hand on his shoulder and pulls him to a stop.  He says, “Oy, Tiny, what do you think you’re doing?”  He motions to the dropped winter outerwear on the floor.  “Pick it up.”  Tiny lets out a heavy sigh and does what he’s told.  Rose and CK just shake their heads. 

Jake looks at me with suspicious eyes and asks, “What’s this about?”

I forwardly say, “You need to decorate this house.  These guys know how it should look.  Ergo, I asked them to come over.”  Jake looks sad, but excited.  I move to him, put a hand on his shoulder and quietly ask, “I hope I did not overstep.” 

He mists up, wraps his arm around my waist, and pulls me close as he softly says, “No.”  He watches his siblings mill around the kitchen getting glasses of water and a few beers.  “Thank you.” 

He walks out of the kitchen toward the hall bath.  While he is gone, I clap my hands together and say, “Ok kids, let’s get some boxes out and put some holiday spirit into this room.”  They all smile and nod.  “CK, tree, real or fake?”

He looks at me with a dull expression, “Look around Colester.  Do you think Nona would actually allow a fake tree into this house?”

I concede the point, nod to him and say, “Ok.  You’re on tree duty.”  I check my watch.  “You have 45 minutes to get one.”  He looks at me blankly, “Don’t care how, don’t care where…get a move on CK.”  I jokingly point to my watch, “Time’s a wasting…” 

He gives me a mock salute and heads for the door, picking up Tiny on the way.  “You’re with me little man.”

“But I want to stay with Monster and Cole.” Tiny whines. 

“Yeah, yeah, and I want to be on a beach in Florida.  We don’t always get what we want.”  He stops, collects Tiny’s outer wear and is out the door. 

After they’ve left, Rose comes to me and gives me a hug.  “Everything ok?” She asks.  I shrug my shoulders.  She quietly asks, “Getting better, I hope?”  she has a slight smile on her face.  I put my fingers about a quarter inch apart and nod.  She smiles and hugs me again. 

Jake comes back from the bathroom.  “Where’d Tiny and CK go?”

“To get a tree.”  I respond.  “The three of us will get started with everything else.”  I turn the TV to the holiday music channel and turn it up.  We all smile and sing the refrain to Holly Jolly Christmas with Burl Ives.

We spend the next half hour getting nutcrackers of all sizes and colors out of individual boxes and putting them around the room.  There are strands of garland which line the mantle over the fireplace. Smaller nutcrackers are placed in the open areas as are some blue and silver Christmas balls.  We put a pinecone wreath on the front door and candles in the windows.  Nona was up to date as I see the candles are on timers.  I let Jake mess with that and get them synced up.  As Rose and Jake are getting more boxes out, I heat up some milk and grab a box of hot chocolate mix from the cupboard.  I spy some mini-marshmallows and get them out too.  I get a text from CK that they are on their way back.  I yell down for them to bring up the tree stand. 

The bring it up with a dark blue skirt which has a silver fringe.  Jake and I move the furniture around so the tree can be placed in the sunroom in middle of the window.  Rose is getting the tree decorations ready to go.  I pull out a string of white LED lights and plug them in to make sure they are still working.  Jake gets the outdoor lights out and plugs a few strands in to make they still work.  He sees one or two lights are out and lets out a disgruntled grunt.  We are knee deep in lights and decorations when we hear CK’s truck pull back into the driveway.

Tiny comes bursting thru the door with snowflakes in this hair and on his jacket. He’s dropping gloves and coats as he runs across the hard wood kitchen floor, making a B-line for Jake.  Due to his clothes and boots, he doesn’t jump, but wraps his hands around Jake’s waist.  Jake rubs his head with affection.

CK comes thru the door, looks at me, and sarcastically says, “Lost my elf, care to help?”  I nod and laugh.  I walk out and see the tree in the back of the truck. 

“How much?” I ask.  He waves me off.  “Dude, tell me or I just VENMO you what I think it costs.”  He tells me.  I’m not entirely shocked, but not surprised.  I pull my phone out and send him the money. 

We carry it in, get it into the base, make sure it’s secure, then let Jake and Tiny cut the string holding it bound up.  As the boughs fall and settle, I see the tree is a Northern blue spruce, about 9 feet tall and 6 feet across.  It is still a foot or two from the ceiling, so we’re ok there.  Rose grabs a watering can of water and fills the base.  We get the lights and a step ladder.  Jake climbs the ladder and starts winding the lights around the tree.  CK suggests we just spin the tree.  We laugh but try it.  We’re done in a matter of minutes. 

45 minutes later, we’re done, except for the star.  Rose pulls out a metal silver painted 5-point star which is bejeweled with sparkly do-dads (yeah, real technical terms).  She hands it to Jake, and I see a tear run down his cheek.  I move to steady the step ladder.  He climbs up, put the star on and just looks at it for a few seconds.  He descends and I see some more tears.  I pull him in a for another hug.  He hugs me back.  Then I feel more arms around us.  We’re in a group hug.  I feel Tiny’s hands around my waist and his face in my lower back.  

We break the hug, step back and admire the tree.  I say, “It looks great.  Nona would be happy.” 

Jake slips his left arm around my waist, pulls me to him and gently says, “Yes, she would.” 

Then I feel him turn and he kisses my cheek.  I blush and feel a rush of blood go south.  I want to turn and pull him into a hug and kiss him all over his masculine bearded face and wrap my arms around his neck and hold him close.  But I break his hold, and quickly announce, “Anyone want hot chocolate with marshmallows?”  I don’t know if I’m ready yet. 

I walk to the kitchen with Tiny on my heels.  I carefully pour him a full mug and let him put the marshmallows in.  He grabs a spoon and stirs it around.  He wanders to the table and sits down to let it cool. 

Half an hour later, we dim the lights in the sunroom and admire the white lights as they dance on the windows and glass ceiling.  Rose says the tree is beautiful and we all nod in agreement.  CK speaks up and says Nona would be happy with it.  Jake reaches for my hand, grasps it, and squeezes.  I squeeze it back.  Tiny asks where the presents are.  We all laugh, and Rose explains they will be there Christmas morning.

His siblings pack up and take off. 

Jake and I sit on the sofa and look at the tree and watch the snowflakes fall outside.  I carefully mention, “I hope they all get home safely.”

Jake puts his paw of a hand on my thigh, grips it, and confidently says, “They will.  We all grew up learning how to drive in the snow.  This is nothing for CK and Rose, unlike you ‘city-folk’ who get scared of a few flakes.”  I turn and see he has a grin on his face.

“And on that note, I’m heading up.”

“You sure you don’t want to stay here for just a bit longer?”  I turn to see him looking at me longingly.  His green eyes are both sad and excited at the same time.  He pats the sofa, then rubs the cushion.  I bite my lower lip and look from side to side.  “I promise I won’t bite.”  He cracks half a smile.  I really want to sit and feel his strong, loving arm around my shoulder, but I’m not sure we’re ready.  I don’t know… My hesitation is very clear to him.  “It’s ok Cole.”  There’s a sadness in his voice.  “I understand it will take time for us to get back to where we were.  I was hoping tonight would be a step.”  

I smile, nod, and quietly say, “It has Monster, it has.”  I walk to him, lean down, and kiss his bearded cheek. I inhale his mixed musk of sweat and Old Spice.  I put my hand on the back of the sofa and push off and away from him.  His face looks content.

I head up to my room.  I get changed, finish in the bathroom, and lay on my bed.  I stare at the ceiling.  I wonder to myself, ‘How long is a good question.’  I sigh. ‘We’re taking it slow.  He’s talking to me every day about how he feels, what his emotions are, and the weight of running the estate.’  I turn over. ‘Have I been fair to him?  He’s done what I asked, why am I hesitating to be with him?’  I hear his size 13’s on the stairs, then the hallway.  He pauses at my closed door.  I can almost feel him looking at me thru the door.  I feel a tear in my eye.  I miss him so much, but I want to be sure.  He moves on to his room.  I hear his door shut.  I start to overthink it, ‘What if my not being with him is causing him more pain.  He wants to be with me, he’s made it clear, but how far do I let it go the first time.  All the way, halfway?’

Next thing I know, I’m out the door and down the darkened hallway.  I stand in front of his door and put my hand on the knob.  My other hand is on the wood panel.  I let my head slowly lean to the door and press against it.  I stand there for a minute taking some deep breaths.

I softly knock once, then turn the knob.  His room is dark.  I see him on the bed, under the sheets, but with his arms behind his head as he stares at the ceiling.  He looks to me, his face showing the slightest sign of happiness.  I move to the bed and slide under the sheets next to him.  He slides his right arm around my shoulder.  I lean my head back into his unflexed bicep and smile as I remember the feeling of my head on his muscle.  I put my left hand on his upper thigh and pat him.  We slide down the bed a bit and I turn my body, so I am facing him.  I drape my right arm over his chest, as I have done many times, and let it rest on his hairy pecs.

Our breathing comes into sync.  He whispers, “Thank you.”, then we fade out.

I stir the next morning and feel I have turned away from him.  I am on my right side, but feel his left arm draped over my ribs, holding my body to his.  I slowly open my eyes, but do not make an attempt to move. His breathing is deep and paced.  I stay still and enjoy the moment.  I glance to the clock and see it is still quite early.  I don’t need to be at work for a while. 

I put my left hand on top of his and let it rest, feeling his warm hirsute forearm. His legs twist a bit, and he starts to roll to the other side of the bed.  I release his arm and it slides off me.  I feel him turn over.  I slowly turn to face his muscular back.  I notice he’s letting his hair grow out too.  I put my fingers into his hair and gently play with some of the curls.  I let my fingers run along the nape of his neck and down to his shoulders.  My hand comes to rest, and I start to think, ‘I hope this is the right thing, for both of us.  I hope it’s not too soon.’. 

I awaken again and realize I am flat on my back.  Jake’s arm is across my mid-section, pinning me to the bed.  The covers are strewn around the bed.  There are none on his side and the ones on my side are only covering my legs.  I glance as his body and watch his godly naked body sleep, hoping he will be boyfriend again.

He snores a bit, then slowly wakes.  I watch his eyes flutter open slowly.  He stares at the ceiling, then tentatively turns his head to me.  I wink at him, and he smiles.  I say, “Morning.”, and smile.

“Hey.”  He turns his body toward me and reaches his left hand for my head.  His hand slides along my cheek, then to my ear.  His fingers play with my hair, and he smiles again.  “I miss this.” He says softly.

I nod in agreement. I take his wrist in my hand, pull it from the back of my head, and to my lips.  I softly kiss it.  His skin is soft.  I hold it to my face and let the heat warm me.  He doesn’t make any move to pull away.  We continue to stare at each other.  I wonder what he’s thinking and I’m sure he’s doing the same of me.  I make the first move, and lean up, “I hate to do this, but I need to get a shower and ready for work.” 

He nods, but I see a sadness in his eyes as our moment is ending.  My heart sinks. I slowly lower myself back onto the bed and snuggle closer to him.  I put my arm over his chest and pull him a bit closer to me.  He sighs with appreciation.  I kiss his cheek and intertwine my legs with his.  “Maybe I can call out today, because of the snow.”  He smiles, moves closer, and kisses my forehead. 

I move my right hand from his chest to his face. I turn his face toward me.  When we’re looking eye to eye, I lean to him and kiss him on the lips.  No force, just a simple kiss.  My moist lips touch his warm ones.  I close my eyes and let my mind drift thru all the times we’ve done this.  I can feel my heart beat a bit faster.  I groan to myself.  I’ve missed my man.

I feel him slide his right arm under my armpit and he pulls me closer.  The kiss does not increase in pressure or force, he just wants me closer to him. 

I decide to take the next step.  I release my right hand, break the kiss, and untangle my legs.  His face shows disappointment at my sudden disengagement.  I surprise him by twisting my body around.  I throw my right leg over his waist, then use my arms to pull me up so I am straddling his midsection. 

I look down and see his excited green eyes looking back at my clear blue ones.  He moves his hands to my hips and lets them sit there.  I start to lean down onto his body. I know my added weight won’t cause him any issues.  We are lying chest to chest.  His naked steel plate pecs with pointy, sensitive nipples are poking into the t-shirt I’m wearing. I move my face closer to his.  I take a deep breath and move in for the kill, so to speak. 

We kiss, gently at first, but then I increase the pressure.  I feel his hands move from my hips to my back.  He hugs me to him.  I moan at the feeling I’ve missed for too long.  I exhale into his mouth.  He takes it in, then breaths back into mine.  I move my hands to his hair and let my fingers run thru his curls, feeling the softness of them.  I feel his hands move to match mine.  He runs his fingers thru mine, curling my blonde hair in his strong fingers.  We continue to kiss.  I pull his head up to mine, increasing the force of my kissing.  He reciprocates.  I feel a low groan emanate from his midsection.  As it comes out of his mouth, he squeezes me tighter. 

This sensation causes my unit to twitch.  I’d been very careful up until now, but the feeling of his body warming up and his hands wandering over mine, caressing my back and ass, pushes all the right buttons in me.  A woody starts to form.  I break our kiss and push myself upright, using Jake’s chest as a push off point. He smiles at me, and I can tell he’s felt my hard-on.  As I sit on his waist, I can feel his unit has hardened a bit too.  I give him a snarky smile and think to myself, ‘Well this is a fine pickle you’ve gotten yourself into.  Where do you go next?’  I look down at his green eyes, bedhead hair, neatly trimmed beard, and prominent jawline.  My brain clicks.  Next thing I know I’m shifting my hips backward and forward on his midsection. 

I brace my hands on his pecs and start to move a bit faster and apply more pressure.  He rises to the occasion.  I feel his hands move to my hips and take hold of me.  I scoot back a few inches and am right on top of his steel pipe. 

I slow my pace and lean down again, taking his left nipple into my mouth. I let my tongue slather saliva on his hairy pec and then wrap it around the tip of the nipple.  I lightly wiggle it left and right and feel Jake exhale a deep breath as he tries to calm himself.  I purse my lips and suck his nip and some of the areola into my mouth.  His skin is warm, the nipple firm. I dampen it with more moisture and then suck it off him violently, using my tongue.  I rake my teeth across the area and suddenly feel his arms on my back as he hugs me tighter to him.  He emits a loud moan and his body quivers. I release him and quietly ask, “You ok there, big guy?”

He growls back to me, “Fuck yeah.  Don’t stop!”

I drop my head back to his nipple and start the process over again.  I feel his left hand on the back of my head.  He applies pressure and forces my mouth down onto him.  I nibble him again and he shakes some more.  His right-hand clenches the bedsheet and I know there is no way I can break his hold until he releases it.  I go back to doing my thing. 

I lift my head and slide to the left to give his right nipple the same care.  I also start to gyrate my hips some.  He arches his back and his unit presses into my abs, thru more shirt.  My unit is confined by my PJ bottoms, but is freely spewing pre-cum.  I can feel the dampness and stickiness. As I rake my teeth over his nip and areola for the fourth or fifth time, I feel him move his hands to my lats to push me off him.  His breathing is ragged, his chest is heaving, and sweat has formed on most of his naked body.  I latch on to his lats in a futile attempt to stay connected to him, but his strength is too much.  He just pushes a bit harder, and my mouth comes off him. I give him my best puppy eyed dog look and he winks at me.

“Stand up.” He commands me.  I climb off the bed and stand next to it. He gets up next and moves so we are chest to chest.  He puts his hands on the bottom my t-shirt and lifts it up and off me.  He looks at my bottoms and the obvious tent which has formed, then into my eyes.  He cocks an eyebrow and looks down again.  I get the message and quickly undo the drawstring, maneuver them over my unit, and let the fall to ground. 

He moves in, gives me a kiss, and softly says, “Very nice, Cole, very nice.”  He kisses me again and I feel his left hand move and take hold of me.  His grip is firm, and he begins a slow and steady motion.  I grab him and match his movements.  I one-up him by taking his left nipple in my right and start to twist and tug at it.  He looks upward, closes his eyes, and starts to moan again. I move to kiss his exposed neck.  His soft beard smells like the bed sheets and his musk.  I nibble at his throat and lick this beard, coating him with more saliva.  I feel like I’m marking my territory.  He continues to moan and groan.

I begin to feel pre-cum ooze out of him.  He body tenses.  I jerk him a few more times and try to twist off his nipple.  He lets loose a roar which probably started in his gut.  His body shakes violently, and he grips me a bit harder than he normally does to steady himself. I feel his load travel up his unit, under my fingers, then explode out of him and onto my abs.  It feels like paint gun pellets hitting me in quick succession. 

As his load eases, he lowers his head, then grunts one or two times as I yank him to make sure every drop of cum is out. He bucks his hips to help me.  I feel his warm cum start to slide down my abs toward my crotch.  I glance down at it.  He immediately says, “Don’t you worry buddy, I’ve got this.”  He quickly moves his hands to my hips, squats down a few inches, then pushes upward, lifting me off the ground and tossing me back onto the bed.  I land in the middle and immediately sink into the comforter.  Jake is on me in a flash.  He winks, then moves south.  He grabs my unit in one hand and moves it out of the way. 

I feel his warm tongue on my abs as he licks and scoops his cum from my body into his mouth.  He’s very adept at this and is done in a few seconds.  Feeling his rough tongue on my body sends a shiver down my body.  He feels it and when he finishes with his load, he moves my hardened unit to his mouth.  He doesn’t play games.  He simply opens his mouth and swallows me to the hilt. 

His nose hits my lower abs, and he pushes a bit harder, trying to get more of me into him.  I suck in my gut and feel him move his hands under my ass.  He grips my butt cheeks and pulls them upward, forcing more of me into him.  Now it’s my turn to groan.  I stretch my arms out to the sides and grip the comforter and sheets for dear life.  Jake goes into autopilot mode.  He starts bobbing his head up and down and a quick pace.  His strong fingers kneed my glutes.  I tightly close my eyes, trying very hard to extend this feeling and moment for as long as I possibly can. 

Then he does it.  I didn’t even feel him spread my cheeks apart.  His left middle finger massages my hole once or twice.  I don’t even have time to get used to it.  After the second swirl around the hole, he plunges it into me.  I gasp and thrash my head from side to side.  Now it’s my turn to try to get him off me.  I attempt to squirm away, but he simply crooks the finger in my ass and pulls my body back to him. 

He picks up the pace of blowing my unit, which is now hitting the back of his throat with every downward push.  His tongue is depositing copious amounts of saliva on me.  I can feel some leak out of his mouth, down my hips, and onto the sheet below me.

He plunges his finger all the way into me, swirls it around, buries his nose in my crotch, and sucks for all he’s worth.  I cannot hold it any longer.  I feel the lightning bolt shoot from my brain to my crotch.  My balls feel like they are crawling into my body and my load empties from them.  It travels the distance in what feels like years, but is only a few seconds.  I let out a roar and feel my eyes roll into my head.  My body convulses four times as each shot leaves me.  Jake just keeps his lips attached to my unit.  I hear him suck my cum up like a Dyson vacuum, and swallow it. 

He eases his finger out of my ass and slowly lowers my body to the bed. 

He moves up the bed and lays next to me, propped up on his right elbow.  He smiles and moves to kiss me.  As we kiss, I can taste my cum and the remnants of his on his lips.

Our sweaty bodies lie on the sheets for what seems like eternity, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.  His left hand is softly caressing my left thigh and hip.  I stare at the ceiling.  I turn to the left and look at him.  He smiles and leans over to gently kiss me.  He says, “That was nice.” I smile back.  We kiss again.  “I hope this is our new starting point.”

I reach my right arm over to him and pull his body on top of mine.  We kiss as his weight settles onto me.  I quietly say, “I’ve missed you so much Jake.  I was scared to make the first move.”  He looks at me with confusion in his eyes.  “Then last night, I heard you pause at my door.  I could almost feel you looking at me thru the wall.  My heart ached to be with you, but my brain was overthinking it.”  I move to caress his sweaty back.  “Next thing I knew, I was at your door, then in bed.”  He smiles.  “I want to be with you again, as your boyfriend, but I’m still scared you may shut me out again.”  His face darkens.  “I’m not sure…”  I look away.

“Cole.”  I hesitate to look at him.  He puts his hand on my cheek and with some gentle force, turns my head so I am looking at him.  “I’m sorry for what I put you through.  You saw the grief I was going thru.  I have no excuses for what I did.  I turned a deaf ear to Rose, and everyone else who told me to talk to you.”  I feel a tear form.  “I was scared of being with you, and scared of losing you, at the same time.”  He takes a breath, rolls off me, and stares at the ceiling.  “Nona was my rock, my conscience, my world.” The last part comes out as a whisper.  “Yeah, we did not always see eye to eye, but I knew she loved me.  To then lose her so quickly, and to hear her say she was ready…just…”  His voice fades. I scoot back on the bed and sit against the headboard.  I take his head into my hands and move it to my lap.  I pat his shoulders and chest, letting him know I am here for him.  “I knew you wanted to help, but I did not want you to see me as weak, someone who couldn’t cope with…”

“Oh Jake,” I say pleadingly.  “We all take the death of a loved one hard.”  He takes a few deep breaths, and his chest expands and contracts.  “I’d have been more scared if you hadn’t been mourning her.”  I pat his body again.

We stay silent for a few minutes.  I try not to overthink it.  ‘I’m back with my boyfriend, he still loves me as much as I love him.  Christmas is around the corner.’ “Shit.” I say out of shock.

“What?!”

“I need to call my mom and let her know I won’t be down.” 

“Is that going to be a problem?  If it is, I think you should go.” I caress his hair.  “I’ll be here, waiting for you.”

“No, I made my decision to stay with you.  I’m sticking with it.  Explaining it won’t be an issue, but the guilt she’ll try to put on me, will be.”  I groan in my head and about the conversation and how it will go.  I pat his shoulders and say, “Ok, now I really do need to get up and get moving.  I’ve got a lot to do, and only a few days to get it done.”

“Or…we could stay in bed and enjoy this snow day with some really hot sex.”  He says as he turns over and takes ahold of my stiffening unit.  He wiggles his bushy eyebrows and rolls his tongue inside his mouth.

His hand feels great on me, but I need to get moving.  I put my hand on his bearded cheek and softly say, “Later today, I promise.”  He grudgingly let’s go of me.  I slide to the edge of the bed and then off.  I turn to see him watching me leave. 

I flex my glutes.  “Not funny Patterson.  I’ll get you back for that.”

The day flies by.  I made it back to my condo without incident.  I got to work, late, but made it.  I explained I was not used to driving in the snow.  They bought the excuse, this time.  I text Jake a few times to make sure he’s doing ok.  He gets back to me when he’s able.  I’m sure he still has quite a bit to do to get the big house ready for the guests.

At lunch, I decide it’s time to make the call.  I call mom. She picks up on the first ring.  I’ll be she was watching the phone, just waiting for me to call.  “Hey mom.” I say in a cheerful voice.

“You’re not coming down, are you?”  She sounds down.  Not sure if it’s my news or holiday stress in general.

I go thru my explanation. She ‘um’s and hmm’s’ a few times but does not interrupt.  When I finish, she condescendingly says, “Well, if you think it’s best to stay with Jake, I understand.”

“Thank you.” I say thru partially gritted teeth.  In my mind I’m saying, ‘No mom, don’t show any sympathy for the man I love.  You know the guy who has gone thru a rough emotional patch and that I want to be with at a time when he’ll be missing his grandmother immensely.’ “I’ll call Christmas eve and Christmas day and talk to Tommy and Caleb.”

“Thomas.” She curtly corrects me.

I decide not to get into with her.  “I sent their gifts to Michelle’s place a while ago.  She let me know they arrived.”

“Yes, we rec’d your packages too.  So did Alexander.”

We are silent for a few seconds.  The ugly pregnant pause.  It drags.  I know she’s waiting for me to speak first so she can get a dig in.  I quickly say, “Ok then, I’ll call in a few days.  Love you.  Bye.”  I hang up, not waiting to hear her response. 

I get back to work, feeling good that I will not be around her drama.  I reinforce my mood by going online and finding a few gifts for Jake and Tiny.  I’ll get gift cards for everyone else.  I pay extra for the rush delivery, but I’ve got the money, and they’re worth it. 

As I’m leaving at the end of the day, I get a text from Jake asking how my call to my mom went.  I send back a quick note saying, “Fine.”

He replies, “Liar.”  I laugh to myself.  He knows me.  “Want to meet for dinner and talk about it?  I can listen as well as you can.”  A smile creeps across my mouth.

“Ok, but I want to hit the gym first and work off some tension.  Say 7, at the diner?” I get a thumbs up response a few seconds later. 

730 later.  Dinner was good.  I need to take a break from the Monster Special.  I can feel the weight in spite of my exercising.  He looks me in the eyes and slowly says, “So…”

I roll mine.  “I’ll have to take you to meet her at some point.  Then you’d know why I hardly go back.”  He lets out a chuckle and reaches his left hand to my right.  His thumb caresses the top of my hand.  I take some breaths.  “She said she understood why I didn’t want to come down for Christmas, but I know she feels I’m snubbing her, for you.”

“Aren’t you?”  He asks cautiously.

I think about it for about 2 seconds, then look him in the eyes.  With all seriousness I say, “Jake, you’ve just been thru 4 of the roughest months of your life.  We’re just starting to get back on track.  I think my family can cope with me not being there for the annual Patterson family Christmas snooze fest.”  He grins and grips my hand.  “Trust me, the money I spent on their gifts will smooth over any sore feelings pretty well.”

“Ok then.” He says in an uncomfortable tone.

I relent and ease off a bit.  “Jake, I’m sorry.” 

He half smiles and asks, “Has it always been this way?  This bad?” I shrug my shoulders.  “How do your siblings feel about it?” 

“Michelle and her husband deal with it.  Mom dotes on Tommy and Caleb, so Michelle is pretty much stuck where she is.  If she tried to leave, the grief she would get for taking ‘the grandchildren’ away would shame her into staying.  Zander, well, he’s kind of like me.  I got away.  He’s trying.  If he had a better job, not saying that being a carpenter is bad, but if he could move away, he would.”  I sigh heavily.  “When I was in the city, I offered him a bed and told him there were so many opportunities for a guy with his skills, but he could never make the move.”

“What about now?”  Jake asks.  I raise an eyebrow.  “Well, we are still looking for a caretaker.  Do you think he’d be interested?”

I roll it over in my head. ‘Would he jump at the chance to get away, or would he feel inclined to stay?’  I slowly say, “I could ask him at some point.”  Jake nods to me. 

We finish, pay, and leave.  In the parking lot, Jake wraps his right arm around my waist and pulls me close.  We get to my car first.  I pull out the remote car starter, click it, then turn to him.  I lean back onto the car, and he moves in for a kiss.  Our warm breaths mingling in the chilly air.  I feel his hands move to my ass and grip me firmly.  I put my hands on his boulder shoulders and squeeze his muscles thru his winter jacket.  The kiss goes on.  He pulls my hips closer to his.  I feel his boner thru his jeans.  I’m sure he can feel mine.  Then his phone rings.  We break our kiss.  He pulls back, pulls his phone out, and checks to see who’s calling.  He whispers, “I have to take it.  It’s dad.”  I nod and he moves off a few feet.

3 minutes later, he comes back over.  He has a sad look in his eyes as he says, “I need to head over to mom and dads.  Tiny’s acting up and they think I can help.”  I nod. 

I lean in for one last kiss.  “Call me later, I’ll be up for a while.”  He nods.  “I hope Tiny is ok.”

“Me too.”

An hour later, I’m at the condo paying bills when my phone beeps. I look to see a message from Jake.  Tiny’s in a bad way and he’s going to spend the night to try to help out.  I send back a thumbs up and ask if he needs anything.  He writes back that’s he’s fine and we’ll talk in the morning.  I send another thumbs up back to him. 

I close my eyes, lean back in my chair, and put my hands behind my head, weaving my fingers thru my hair. I massage my scalp softly and think about the last few days.  I think to myself, ‘I’m hoping we’re back on track.  It seems like it.’  I’m still hesitant to move back in with him or have him move in with me.  Just something in the back of my head is poking at me.  As far as getting back in the sack with him, ‘It would be fun, but would it send the wrong signal? But I can’t be wishy-washy for too long, can I?  I know he says he understands, but is he saying it to placate me, or does he agree that we need to take it slow?’ 

My phone beeps and I come out of my thoughts.  I see Zander has texted me.  ‘Uh-oh, word has spread.  Wonder what he thinks?’  I read his message and it’s just as I thought.  I decide to call.  Texting would lose a lot in the translation.

He picks up on the first ring, “Yo bro!”  His voice is cheerful.

“Dude, what’s shakin?” I give it right back to him.

“So…boyfriend over family?  Is that what it takes to get out of this cluster?”  He laughs as he says this, but I can hear the underlying accusation.  I can also see him spreading his hands and arms out and waving them around his apartment in Media.

“Z, what do you want me to say?  We all know how she can be, especially around the holidays.”  I pause and add, “I am glad I was down for Thanksgiving.  Jake and I were not in a good place, and seeing you, Michelle, and the kids was nice.  It really helped.”  I hear him grunt.  “But we’re just starting to get back on track and it’s going to be rough.  I mean, he’s still living in the house and she’s everywhere.”  I pause.  “We decorated a few days ago.  It was very emotional for him, and his siblings.  If I hadn’t pressed the issue, I doubt he would have put anything up.”

“Oh.” He says quietly.  “Yeah, mom really didn’t say too much about that.”  Now it’s my turn to grunt, but with disapproval.

“I’ll call Christmas morning.  Guessing you’ll be having breakfast with them?” 

“Yeah…then presents…then the long afternoon until dinner.”  I groan at the agony of the long day it ends up being. 

“I wish I could say ‘I’m sorry I’ll miss it’, but…not really.”  I say with just a hint of sarcasm.

“Yeah, yeah, rub it in Cole, rub it in…”  I can hear the sadness in his voice. Not that we’ve been best buds over the years, but at Christmas, we put it all aside and we have fun. 

“Ok, ok, sorry.” I say with all sincerity.  “Hey, on a different topic, how’s work?”

“Eh, you know…ebbs and flows.” 

“You every think of looking for something more stable?”  He grunts. “Jake’s looking for a new caretaker at the estate, someone with a good head on their shoulders, knows how to do stuff, and can work without a lot of supervision.  Now, I know you fit all but the last one…”

“Keep it up funny boy.”

“Honestly, would you be interested?  I can get Jake to call you and talk details, but he really needs someone reliable and pretty quickly.” 

I go silent and let Z think about it.  “I don’t need an answer right now.  How about I start a text thread with the three of us.  That way you’ll have each other’s number. You can then figure it out between the two of you.”

He’s still silent, but he quietly says, “Yeah, I think that may be best.  I make no promises.”

“I don’t expect any.”

“But a change may be what I need.”

“I’ll send him a note tonight and make sure it’s ok.  If it is, I’ll send the text.  If you don’t get it tonight, definitely tomorrow morning.”

“Ok.  And thanks Cole.”  I can feel him smiling and calming down.

“What are big brothers for…Don’t answer that.”  We both laugh. After a few more minutes of catching up, we hang up.  I check the time and see it’s not too late.  I send Jake the note and get back to paying bills.

I wander to the kitchen, grab a beer, and sit to read a book on my Kindle.  As I start to doze, my phone buzzes.  I see it’s a note from Jake.  He sent a big smiley face and a row of ‘thumbs up’.  I smile to myself. I start a new text thread as promised. 

***

December 24^th.  Christmas eve morning.  Gratefully it’s Saturday.  I was able to sleep in a bit.  Now, finishing wrapping presents, watching ‘The Year without a Santa Claus’, then off to Jake’s for quick trip to the pond, with him and Tiny.  Tonight, dinner at his parents, back to Jake’s, then on to Christmas day.  My overnight bag is already packed and the bulk of presents in bags, ready to be delivered.

As I’m finishing up, I get a text from Jake asking what time I’ll be over.  I write back, ‘About ½ hour, if that’s ok?’  He writes back, ‘Perfect!  Tiny is excited to see you.’  He adds winking emoji. I think to myself, I hope he isn’t the only one.  I laugh and put all the wrapping supplies away.  I quickly clean up, check my bags, then carry everything to my car.  I see a dusting of fresh snow on top of the two feet we already have.  Never got to see too many white Christmas’ in the Philly area growing up.  Glad I get to see one now. 

The drive over is quick.  Not too many people out.  I pull into the estate and drive right to the caretaker’s house.  Jake’s truck is there.  I see small and large footprints all around.  I grow a bit suspicious.

As I get out of my car, Jake comes out of the garage with his jacket on, but not zipped up.  He jokingly says, “I thought you’d be here sooner, given how you city folk drive.”  He’s got a huge smile on his face as he walks up to give me a kiss.  After we kiss, he doesn’t let go.  His grip loosens but he whispers to me, “I’ve got a little surprise for you…”

I whisper back, “I thought we didn’t call him ‘little’. As I squeeze his ass.

“Oh, he’s not little, but the guy behind you is…” and with that, he spins me around to face Tiny who has a hand full of snowballs.  He starts throwing them at me from point blank range.  I struggle in Jake’s arms to get out of the way, but he holds me in place with ease.  Tiny laughs every time one hits me.  Once he’s out, Jake let’s go of me.  I reach for Tiny and pull him to me. I pick him up and toss him in the air.  I catch him on the way down.  He’s still laughing, almost crying with joy. 

I set him down, squat down in front of him, and ask, “Was this your idea or Monster’s?”  He looks past me to Jake, then back to me and giggles.  He points to Jake, and I wink at him.  I lean close to him and say, “Maybe we should toss some at him?”  I raise an eyebrow and scoop up some snow.  He does the same.

I hear Jake say, “Careful there Cole…be sure you want to do what I think you’re going to do…” 

I wink again to Tiny with a huge grin.  I mouth ‘three, two, one’ to him and we turn and throw the balls at him.  Tiny is laughing again and running around the driveway scooping up more snow.  I sidle up to Jake, pull in him for another kiss, and say, “You know, I will have to get you back for this.” 

He kisses me and sarcastically says, “I’m expecting some sort of payback.”  He winks then kisses me. 

Tiny comes up, pelts us with some snowballs and says, “Come on you two, we need to get to the pond.  The best snow is out there.”  He grabs Jake’s hand and starts tugging him. 

“Ok, little man, ok.”  He says with exasperation.  “Just let Cole take his stuff inside and let me get my hat and gloves and we’ll be on our way.”  Tiny rolls his eyes and wanders off to make some more snowballs. 

As I take my bag inside, I comment, “You’re trying to wear him out for tonight, aren’t you?”  He gives me a knowing nod and a half smile.  “Hope it works.”  I lean over and kiss him again.

We make our way to the pond, build some snowmen, make some snow angels, and drink some warm cocoa.  Jake and I add a splash of bourbon to ours.   

After about 45 mins, Tiny seems to be slowing down.  He is sitting on the bench while Jake and I build another snowman. Jake nudges me and I nod in agreement.  We gather everything up and head back to the house.  Jake checks to see if the guests have called.  They have not.  He picks up the phone and gives them a call to let them know he is heading out for the evening.  He gives them his personal cell phone number in case of an emergency.  When he hangs up, I stare at him.  He sees my confusion and calmly says, “Cole, not everyone comes up for a month of rest.  Some people actually like to stay connected to the real world while they are here.”  I sigh and shake my head. 

I wander to the sunroom and see the tree still looks nice.  I see some presents under it.  I see some bigger ones as well.  I peek and see they’re for Tiny, naturally.  Tiny comes to my side and quietly says, “I tried to lift this one,” He points to the biggest one with his name on it, “but I couldn’t budge it.”  He tugs on my sleeve, and I lean down.  In his best ‘whisper’ voice, he asks, “Can you lift it and shake to see what’s in it?”  His eyes dart around the room making sure Jake isn’t watching.  He pushes me toward it.  I play along and try to lift the box, but find it is rather heavy, heavier than I expected. 

Jake’s booming voice comes across the room, “What are you two up to over there?  I hope you’re not trying to get a sneak peek at what Santa left.”

I casually respond, “No, not us, we’re just admiring the quality wrapping job on the gifts, isn’t that right Timothy?”  Tiny is giggling and tugging my sleeve, trying to hide behind me. I look down to see him nodding his head up and down.  “See, nothing to worry about Jacob.”

Jake gives us a sly look and says, “Ok, we need to get cleaned up and ready to head over to dinner.  Tiny, you get to shower first.”  He walks over to us and shoos him up the steps.  “Keep most of the water in the shower, please.  The bigger the mess you make, the longer it will take for us to get to dinner.”

Once he’s up and we hear the shower turn on, I pull a couple Stella’s from the fridge and hand him one.  We clink bottles. I say, “The night will go fast, probably too fast.”  He nods and sighs.  “You’re thinking of Nona, aren’t you?”  He slowly nods again.  I move around the island and pull him into a hug.  I wrap my arms around him and pull him to me using his lats.  I can smell the sweat and perspiration on him.  I feel a tingle down below, but quickly stop it from becoming more.  I kiss his cheek and say, “I’m here for you, Jake.  Remember, everyone is here for you.  If you’re sad, I’m sure someone else is too.  Talk about Nona.  Remember her life and the fun Christmas’ you had with her.  It’s the best way to honor her.”

He nods again and quietly says, “Thank you Cole, for everything.  For being here, staying here, staying with me.  It means the world to me that you’re here with my family today and tomorrow.  I will not forget this.”  He leans over and gives me another kiss.

We hear the water turn off and the shower door slam shut.  Jake rolls his eyes and starts for the steps.

A few minutes later Tiny comes down, ready to go.  I hear the shower turn on.  I watch over Tiny til Jake’s done.  When he comes done, I head up.  I quickly shower and change.

We head over.  Tiny is chatting away in the back seat.  He’s gotten his second wind.

As we pull up, we see we’re the last ones to arrive.  Once the car is parked, Tiny jumps out and runs to the house.  We get out and wander up.  I admire the lights on the bushes and trees.  White lights on the low bushes and colored lights wrapped around the fir trees in front of the house. At the front door, there are a stack of fake wrapped gifts with colorful paper and bows.  I also see two 4-foot-tall Nutcrackers.  One is in a bright red uniform and is holding a sword, the other is in gold uniform with a black shield with yellow decorations. We enter the house and see it is decorated expertly.  There’s a small live white pine tree with just white lights in the foyer.  It is surrounded by pink and white Poinsettia’s. In the hallway to the kitchen, garland is strung over the pictures on the wall.  In the kitchen, not too many decorations, but what is displayed is very nice and fits the decor perfectly.  I wander into the dining room and see a festive runner on the table with pine boughs around the white and red candles.  On the buffet table are holiday plates and dark green cloth napkins.  There is also a different set of silverware out.  I see wine glasses and an impressive selection of white and red wines.  The lights are low, but it is still bright enough to see. 

In the living room is the main tree.  A real 8-foot blue spruce.  White lights and an assortment of classic ornaments and ones that have been made by 6 children thru the years. There a 5-point silver star on top and a full manger set-up under the tree.

Over the fireplace are a row of stockings.  I count nine and pause.  There are names on all of them and I see one for me.  My breath catches and my hand reaches out for the wing-back chair I am standing next to.  Colleen (Jake’s mom) comes in and sees me.  She walks up, wraps her hand around my waist and says, “Of course you have a stocking.  Jake insisted we put one up for you.”  I feel tears well up in my eyes.  “What he didn’t know is I had already gotten one for you.”  I turn to her and see her eyes are as misty as mine.  “Oh Cole, don’t act so surprised.  With everything you’ve done for Jake over the past few weeks and months, while I know it wasn’t easy, the fact that you stuck to him, did not go un-noticed.”  I sigh and squeeze her back.  “All the times he was here trying to sort thru things and we’d ask if he had talked to you, and he hadn’t.  Well, let’s just say, Nona wasn’t the only one who could go all Nona on him.”  She breaks into a sly smile.  The smile fades a bit as she continues, “I know it took a long time and some trickery to get him to meet you…but, I’m glad it worked.”  Now it’s my turn to smile.  “Now he just chatters away about being back with you and how supportive you are.”  I let out a huge sigh and look towards the ceiling to keep the tears from falling.  “You’ve made my baby happy again, and for that, I’m eternally grateful.”  She leans over and kisses my cheek.  “Now, I need to get some food in you, you’re just skin and bones compared to everyone else.”  I let out a chuckle as she takes my hand and leads me back to the kitchen. 

Everyone is gathered around the island or in the sunroom having snacks and drinks.  Rose comes up and takes my hand and leads me to the hallway.  “You ok?”  I shrug my shoulders.  “Yeah, Fisher family Christmas is an event.  Just wait ‘til you meet all our cousins.”  My eyes go wide.  She lets out a raucous laugh and says, “You didn’t think it was only us, did you?”  I slowly nod my head nervously up and down.  She laughs again, grabs my arm, and says, “Oh, just wait for the family picnic next spring.  It gives a whole new meeting to the phrase ‘family gathering’.” I’m at a loss.  “Well, dad is the oldest of 5, with each of his siblings having more than 3 kids, and mom is one of 4, where each sibling has at least 2 kids.” I shake my head.  “Quick math puts us at 30 cousins, ranging in age from 32 to 5.  Yeah, Jake’s not the oldest and Tiny’s not the youngest.”  I whistle. 

She continues to chatter away about the family as we make our way back to the kitchen.  Jake sees me and walks over.  “What did you tell him, Rose?  He looks paler than normal.”

“Oh, I just mentioned we have a few cousins.”

Jake rolls his eyes, “Really?  That couldn’t wait until after the holidays.  I just got more boyfriend back. I really don’t want to see him running out of the house before dinner.”  He slides his hand around my waist and pulls me in for a kiss.  “Don’t worry, it’s not as bad as she probably made it seem.”

I studder out, “She said there are 30 cousins?”

“Ok, when you say it like that, I guess it could be a bit…over-whelming.?” 

I roll my eyes and say, “I need a beer, or maybe something stronger.”  We walk to the sunroom and see one more tree.  This is their fake Ficus. It has pink lights and is decorated with small nutcrackers and some strands of beads.

I make an orange crush and start to sip it.  Once I feel the alcohol start to warm my belly, I begin to relax.  I have a few snacks and wander around the room chatting with everyone.  Dinner is ready about 20 minutes later.  I’m on my second drink and decide to switch to water. 

As we gather in the dining room and get in line for the buffet, Jake’s dad shushes everyone and leads us in a prayer.  After that he says a few words, “First, I want to welcome Cole to our Christmas celebration.  I’m very happy he stayed decided to stay and spend it with our family.  With everything our family has gone thru, having you around means a lot to everyone, not just Jake.”  We all smile, and I feel Jake’s hand around my waist.  He gently tugs at me.  I feel his nose in my hair as he kisses my head.  “Nona is missed and will be missed for a very long time.  She…was…a force…”  He pauses to sniffle back a tear, “and I know she’s looking down on us and the rest of the family and making sure we enjoy this night.”  Colleen steps next to him and pulls him into a hug.  “Now, if we could all raise our glasses, I’d like to propose two toasts.” Glasses are raised.  “The first to Nona, may she and Pappy be having a very Merry Christmas, and the second to our new guest, Cole.  Thank you for everything.”  All glasses go up.  I blush as everyone says, “To Nona and Cole.”  Glasses clink all around.  Everyone hugs everyone else. 

Jake turns me to him and whispers, “I love you.” 

I smile and feel a tear form.  “Love you too, big guy.”  We kiss.

I hear CK call out to us, “Cut the PDA lover boys.”  I giggle thru our kiss.

Dinner is a blur.  Too much food, lots of talking, plenty of stories about Jake when he was younger.  A few hours later, I’m nibbling on a Ricotta cheese Christmas cookie, listening to Jen and Rose sing songs.  I turn and see Tiny nodding off in Steve’s lap.  I wander to Jake and slip my hand into his.  He looks at me and nods, knowing it’s time to go.  We make our rounds and discuss what time to be over tomorrow.  Seems like 10am is going to work for everyone.  Steve takes a sleepy Tiny up to get changed for bed.  We head out. 

We take our time driving thru the neighborhood, enjoying all the lights and decorations.  I stare out the window in awe.  Not that we didn’t have similar set-ups in Philly, it’s just, they look some much more in place with snow on the ground and a light round of flurries falling. 

We get back to the caretaker’s house.  Jake takes a quick run up to the main house with his tractor to clear the dusting of snow off the driveway.  While he’s gone, I send texts to my family and hopes everyone had a nice dinner.  I turn the tree lights on and turn on the TV.  I put the holiday music station on and turn the volume down.  I pull two beers from the fridge and wait for him to return.

A few minutes later, I hear his tractor coming down the road.  He opens the door while shaking snow off his hat and jacket.  He sees me on the couch and smiles.  He peels off his boots and makes his way over to me.  Before he sits, he leans down and kisses me.  “Merry Christmas, Cole.”

I put my hand on his bearded cheek and say, “Merry Christmas to you too, Jake.”  We kiss again, and he sits.  The cushion compresses due to his weight, and I slide to him.  He puts his right hand on the nape of my neck and gently massages the area.  I moan at the feeling.  I twist my head around and his fingers continue to work their magic.  My left hand moves to his right thigh, and I rub his muscular leg thru his pants.  I feel him turn my head to him.  He takes his baseball hat off and tendrils of curly dark hair fall over his face.  I use my hand to gently move them, then move closer.  His right arm slips down my back and he pulls me closer. 

We start to kiss again.  I close my eyes and enjoy the moment. His breath is warm when he exhales, but his lips are moist as they press against my chapped lips.  I use my right hand on his left cheek to keep our faces together.  The kiss becomes more intense. I stretch my tongue out and push it inside his mouth.  We jockey for position, and I think he lets me win.  His right hand moves up and down my back, with his fingers raking my skin thru my shirt.  I feel my unit start to tingle.  I continue to put pressure on his lips and move my right hand to his hair.  I run my fingers thru it and massage his scalp.  My hand comes to rest on the back of his skull, and I apply some more pressure, pushing his face to mine.  I realize I’m breathing hard and feel a light sweat breaking out.

We come up for air.   He smiles and winks, and says, “I’ve missed you.”

I wink back at him.  I stand up, slip my shoes off, and turn to face him.  I reach my left hand out and he takes it.  I pull back, trying to pull him to his feet.  He gets the idea and stands up.  My right hand moves up and down his left arm, feeling his bicep and forearm.  He instinctively flexes his arm as my hand passes over it.  I feel the hard muscle underneath and allow my unit to become engorged with blood.  It starts to expand as I continue to feel him up.  I move my left hand to his chest and find his right nipple thru his polo.  I gently grab it and twist.  He moans with gratitude.  He looks me in the eye, slips his right hand around my body, and gets a firm grip on my ass.  I clench my cheeks as he squeezes harder.  I twist his nipple and grab his bicep with more force.  My unit feels like a hot metal rod and I can feel it pointing upward.

He growls, “Someone is ready for some action…”  He moves in for another wet, moist, warm kiss.  My hands continue to work his body over.  His left continues to squeeze my ass cheek.  I moan at the pressure. 

We break and I move to lift his polo off his body.  He sucks in his gut, I wrench the shirt out of his pants, and pull it up his body.  He lifts his arms and once it’s free, I toss it to the side.  I place the palms of my hands gently on his hairy pecs and let them rest, just feeling his chest expand and contract as he breaths.  His body is warm.  I slowly rub my hands thru his silky chest hair, closing my eyes, enjoying the feeling of our bodies touching.

He moans again and moves a step closer.  His hands reach for my blue and white striped button-down shirt.  He winks at me, then quickly moves his hands to the center of my shirt.  He grabs it and yanks his hands side-ways.  Buttons fly in every direction. The shirt rips open, exposing my hairless chest. Now, it’s my turn to growl.  He pulls the torn shirt from my body, takes a long look at me, then rubs his hand over his crotch.  I can see is hardening unit thru the fabric of his pants.  I move to him and grind by waist to his.  Our units rub against each other, causing them to expand more.  He growls again and puts his hands on my ass, forcing me even closer. We bump and grind for another minute or two.  I feel myself start to sweat.  I put my hands on his chest again and push, separating us. 

I take a few deep breaths, cooling myself down.  Jake tenderly rubs his massive left hand up and down my right arm, caressing my bicep and forearm.  He looks my in the eye and quietly asks, “Ok?”  I nod yes.  “Good.” And with that, he crouches down a bit, wraps his hands around my waist, pulls me to him, and stands up.  I let my body fold in half over his shoulder.  He easily moves to the steps and takes us both up without hesitation.

Into his bedroom, he squats down again, my feet hit the floor.  I stand up and so does he.  We slip our pants and underwear off. I stare at him.  His muscular hirsute body on display for me.  Shaggy dark hair, deep green eyes, full beard on a squared off jaw.  I start to salivate, and my sagging unit perks up. 

I see him taking me in as well.  Long blonde hair, blue eyes, swimmers build body, with a bit more muscle.  I inhale and my chest puffs out.  He grins, reaches his hand over to me, and caresses my right pec.  He flicks my nipple and I smile.  His warm hand feels nice. 

He moves close and wraps his arms around me again.  We back up to the bed and he falls backward.  I fall onto his chest and scoot up his sweaty body, so we are face to face.  I lower my body and let my weight settle on him. I bring my lips to his.  A sheen of sweat covers his forehead.  I move my left thumb to his head and wipe some sweat onto my finger.  I bring it to my lips and lick the moisture off.  I can taste the salt. 

He growls at me, “Enough of this taking it slow crap. Either you get your dick into me, or I plow you like I’m moving 4 feet of snow with my tractor.” 

I push my body up from his, look down into his hungry eyes and punch his right pec.  He laughs it off.  I slide off his body, move to the end of the bed, pat the mattress and say, “Get your ass down here big man.  I’m going to make you see Christmas lights every time I ram myself into you.”  I start to giggle at the statement and the fake toughness I said it with.  Jake has a huge grin on his face and immediately slides into position.

I yank my unit a few times and line up my tip with his hole.  I see him peering over his inflated chest to watch the action.  I grab his muscular thighs and pull my body into his.  I quickly slide into his loose hole. I sigh at the feeling, remembering what it’s like.  I close my eyes and tilt my head upwards, which pushes me in just a bit more.

I start to pound his ass with everything I’ve got.  After a few minutes, I hear him go ‘umph’.  I open my eyes, look down at him, and casually ask, “Too rough for you?”  I withdraw a bit, then thrust forward.  He grunts again. “I can always…” withdraw/thrust/grunt “Go a bit easier on your…” withdraw/thrust/grunt “Delicate body…”

He lets out a loud roar and yells, “Give it to me little man.  Don’t you hold back!”  I push into him 3 times in quick succession.  He grunts and moans at the same time.  I feel sweat beading on my face and arms and rolling down my chest.  I keep my grip on his thighs and continue to pound him mercilessly.  

I slow for a bit, pull out until my tip is showing, then slowly move it back in.  It disappears into his furry ass.  He clenches his hole, to keep me in, and to stimulate me more.  When I bottom out, I grunt and use all the strength in my arms to pull on his thighs to get deeper inside him.  It works.  We’re both breathing heavily.  I pant out a few breaths to recuperate some of my strength.  He looks over his chest and says with sarcasm, “You get started yet?  I haven’t felt anything…” 

A sneer comes over my face. I get on my tiptoes, withdraw a bit, then piston into him.  I bottom out again.  Our skin smacks together. Driblets of sweat go flying. I do it again, then again.  We’re both groaning and moaning.  He reaches his hands to the comforter and balls his fists.  I feel my load churning.   

His body tenses.  He suddenly screams with pleasure and ropes of cum fly out of his body, covering him and the bed. I continue to pound him until his load slowly abates. 

Mine is at its peak.  I thrust into him one final time and my load erupts from me.  He quickly maneuvers his mammoth legs around my waist and pulls me to him, locking my body to his.  I convulse three or four times. I feel my cum travel up my unit and pour into him.  I close my eyes again and feel all the tension and pain release from my body.  I become weak in the knees.  They start to shake, I feel like falling, but Jake’s legs keep me from moving. 

Once my load is spent and I begin to soften, I slide out.  He unlocks his legs but sits up and reaches his hands to my forearms.  He steadies me.

He stands, pulls my body to his, wraps his hands around my lower back, and says, “You ok?”  I nod ‘yes’.  He smiles, crouches down a bit, then scoops me up into his muscular arms.  We kiss.  Long, slow, and deep.  He walks us to the bathroom, and he sits me down on the edge of the tub.  He turns the shower on and sits next to me, waiting for it to warm up.  We kiss again and he softly says, “I’ve missed you, Cole.  I’m…sorry…”

I shush him.

I see a tear fall from his eyes.  I wipe it away.  I turn his head to mine, and whisper back, “Merry Christmas Jacob Daniel Fischer, the third.”  I kiss him again.  

He lets out a heavy breath, stands up, reaches for my hand, which I give him.  He pulls me up and to him.  He leads us to the shower and says to me, “Merry Christmas to you, Cole Edward Patterson.”

We kiss as we enter the warm shower.

[Ro20316]

What a fantastic read my man.

 

On 9/30/2022 at 10:21 PM, Psuace said:

He lets out a heavy breath, stands up, reaches for my hand, which I give him.  He pulls me up and to him.  He leads us to the shower and says to me, “Merry Christmas to you, Cole Edward Patterson

Such a sweet end 

[Wrestlejock646]

WOW.  This was an epic ride!  I loved the story and the characters you brought to life. Not sure if this is going to have more additions, but if so, I'm in for the ride. If not, it's great knowing Cole and Jake got to a happy place again. 

[Psuace]

Cole and Jake, part 5, The Cute Disc golfer.

 

Jake’s point of view.

 

Things I do for my boyfriend.  Cole and his insane ideas of having fun. 

I remember his sales pitch for it.  He looked at me with his big clear blue eyes and shaggy blonde hair while we were relaxing in bed, after an afternoon of sex, “Come on Jake, it’ll be fun.  It’s good exercise, and it gets you out into the fresh air.” 

My response with some exasperation, and sweat rolling down my hairy chest, “Cole, I’m 6’3”, 230 pounds.  I’m not the most flexible guy around.”

Cole pats my left pec, squeezes my nipple and comes back with, “Hmmm, you seemed pretty flexible a little bit ago when I pushed your legs to your chest.  I didn’t hear any groans of pain, just moans of enjoyment.”  I blush at his accurate recollection of the events.

“Fine,” I cave to his request, “But on one condition.” He smiles and nods. I run my thick fingers thru his hair and pull his face close to mine.  I whisper, “I go by myself the first time out.” And kiss him. He pulls back and rolls his eyes at me.  “Dude, I don’t need, or want, you to see me trying to throw a frisbee.”

“Um, disc golf disc.”  He says as his right hand wanders down my torso, raking my abs and stopping at my semi-hard dick.

“Fine, whatever.” I roll my eyes right back at him. “That’s my condition.  Take it or leave it.”  I put my proverbial size 13 foot down.

Cole pats my pec again, smiles, and says, “Have it at Monster.  I’ll loan you some of my discs.”  He kisses me again as his hand gets a firm grip on my unit.  I sigh with pleasure.

 

A few days later and here I am.

I head to the first tee box on this beautiful April Saturday morning.  Not a cloud in the sky, temps in the mid 60’s.  I have the discs in my hand.  I’m still hesitant about this.  I’m more used to throwing around some heavy weights, not discs which weigh a few ounces.  My brown hair is slicked back and under my dark blue baseball cap.  My Maui Jim’s sitting upside down over the brim of the hat.  The dark green mesh t-shirt snug over my broad chest and thickly muscled arms. Black mesh workout shorts hugging my thighs, and size 13 Asics on my feet.

I scan the first few holes, but do not see any other golfers. I’m grateful and surprised that Cole didn’t sneak out to watch me.  I watched a number of online videos on the proper technique to throw both a forehand and backhand for a leftie.  I’d gone to the local high school soccer field after work for the past couple days and practiced for a few hours, getting the position and motion down.  

I stand at the first tee and do some light stretches to get some blood flowing thru my arms.  I grab the dark red Beast driver Cole lent me, toss the others to the ground, and walk onto the tee pad.  The disc is medium weight at about 175 grams, but feels like nothing in my hand.  I curl my index and middle finger under the disc and grip the edge.  Thumb on top for support and stability.   I move into position.  I turn sideways, so the hole is to my right and my body is parallel to the hole.  I twist my head to the hole which is 240 feet straight away, then back.  I take a couple practice throws to get the memory motion going.  I close my eyes, take a deep breath, slowly exhale.  Open the eyes, flex the knees, pull the disc back past my left shoulder, take three steps forward, and whip my left arm across my body. 

I watch as my forehand shot sails into the air at a greater upward angle than I had anticipated. ‘Damn’, I think to myself.  The disc starts climbing, flying straight down the fairway.  About halfway into the flight, it fades to the right, the right edge tilts up, and it catches the light breeze.  The disc careens to the left, flies over the fairway from right to left, and lands in the rough, about 50 yards from the tee box.  Out loud I say, “Shit!”. 

I squat down, pick up my other discs and head down the fairway. 

I reach the disc, look at the hole, 30 yards away, and decide to toss the gray mid-range Shark.  This time I turn so my left side is facing the hole.  I pick up some dying grass and toss it in the air.  It floats down to the left, but not very quickly, indicating the breeze is light. I hold the disc with the same grip, but hold it lower on my body.  I’m going to purposely throw it at an angle so it curves from left to right toward the hole. 

Again, I take a few practice throws.  I relax my body, flex my knees, pull my left arm across my waist, then quickly pull it from right to left, but not with my full strength.  Just about 70%.  The disc sails into the air again.  The height and angle look good. The light breeze does not impact the flight.  The disc comes down about 15 feet from the hole on its edge.  It rolls around a few times, moving a few feet closer.  I smile to myself; grateful I have one solid shot in my arsenal.  I gather my discs and walk to the hole.  I think to myself, ‘Keep practicing that shot.’

I reach the hole and see I’m about 8 feet away.  I drop my driver and keep my light blue putter in hand.  I move to the disc, stand over it, spread my legs so it is right below my crotch.  I look at the basket, hold the disc at my chest, and practice my toss, moving my hand from my chest outward.  I look at the top of the basket and imagine I am throwing to a point 3 feet past the hole.  I take a deep breath, flex my knees, then exhale, push off from my heals, and toss the disc at the top of the basket as I come to a standing position.  I don’t use a lot of power, but just enough that the disc soars from my hand. I panic as it seems to be a bit high, but then gravity takes over and pulls it down, clanking into the chains in the basket.  I smile to myself. 

I collect the discs and walk to the next hole. One down, 17 to go.

Second hole, a bit different from the first, 20 yards longer with some pine trees on the right side of the fairway about 150 feet from the tee.  The basket is hidden by the trees.  I decide to throw a forehand shot as it will start left and fade to the right at the end, hopefully past the trees. I stand on the tee box and get my bearings.  I do some practice throws, then get into position.  I suck in my gut, pull my left arm over my chest, glance at the hole, then back.  I take my three-step approach and whip my arm across my body.  The disc sails out of my hand nice and level.  It starts floating left, goes past the trees, then starts to fade right.  I lose sight of it.  I collect my other discs and start to walk up the fairway. 

Cole is right about this course, so far.  The first few holes don’t seem too bad.  He said most courses make them pretty easy so people can get warmed up.

I hear some chatter behind me and I turn to see a threesome step up to the first tee.  I realize I may need to move a bit quicker, or let them play thru if they catch up.

I find my disc in the rough about 50 feet from the hole.  I grab my Shark and get in position to make my approach shot.  I make the same throw as the first hole and the disc lands 10 feet from the hole.  I get in position for the putt, make the toss, and it clangs into the chains.

I walk into the woods to the third tee.  No box, just a dirt patch with a plastic pole in the ground to indicate the end of the tee box.  This fun hole is great for lefties, as it has a 90-degree dogleg to the right.  Fairway goes out 30 yards, turns right, then 40 yards to the hole.  Not very long, but there are a myriad of trees, shrubs, and brush on both sides of the fairway. It also gradually slopes downward about 15 feet from tee to hole.  Given that’s it’s April, most the trees still do not have their leaves and the brush is just getting them.

I decide to throw my driver like I throw my Shark. I’m going to throw a backhand shot with a hard angle so it flies out and hangs a right, hopefully where the fairway turns.

I get into position, play with my grip and stance, then imagine the flight path.  I readjust my footing.  I pull my arm across my body, waist level, then pull back and up.  The disc sails up at a 60-degree angle.  It flies down the fairway, narrowly avoiding some trees on the right. I know right away it’s too far right.  It starts to fade too early and slices into some high branches on a maple tree, then into a birch tree. I hear it hit branches as it falls, but it does not ricochet or bounce off a tree trunk. 

I grumble to myself and start to walk to where I think it landed.  Since the disc is dark red, it may be harder to find in the leaves which litter the ground. 

I find the tree it hit and start to scan the area, not immediately under the tree, but about 10 feet from it.  I scan in an arcing motion from left to right.  There are quite a few leaves on the ground so I use my feet to shuffle them around.  I see a dying pricker bush and step on the stem to make sure it does not scrap my leg.  I expand my radius and keep looking.  I move some forsythia branches and see the disc.  It is tucked into the bush, close to the center.  I crouch down, use my forearms to spread the branches and scooch into the bush as much as I can.  Branches are rubbing my biceps and thighs.  I stretch my right hand out and my fingertips brush the disc.  I grumble and lean in.  Branches creak at the pressure.  I reach again and grasp the edge of the disc. 

I slowly back out.  I stand and brush the dirt and leaves off my shorts and shirt.  I take a deep breath and look for the hole.  It’s off to my left.  I turn to face it and see nothing but brush, weeds, and trees in the way.  I roll my eyes with frustration.  I cannot go through the mess.  I glance up and see some space between the trees.  I grab my Shark.  I decide a hammer-throw would be best.  I recall what the video says about how to throw it. I flex my arm backwards and the disc hits my left shoulder blade.  I extend my arm to get a feel for the motion.  I practice it one or two more times. 

Once I feel comfortable, I plant my feet, flex my knees, and make the toss.  As my arm extends upward, the disc flies out perpendicular to the ground.  As it gains altitude, it starts to twist so the top of the disc is the bottom, and the bottom is the top.  It levels out for a few feet then begins to descend.  It flips over again and I lose sight of it. I hear it hit the ground.

I make my way out of the brush and toward the hole.  I scan the area and see the Shark about 10 feet from the hole.  It is next to another tree.  I move to stand behind it.  Not the cleanest shot due to the tree, but I can plant my one foot where the disc sits and extend my right leg out, but no closer to the hole.  I do, and realize I have an easy shot.  I take my time, flex my knees, and aim for a few feet past the basket.  The baby blue putter comes out of my hands softly and clangs into the basket. 

I hear a voice behind me say, “Nice toss.”  I swivel my head around and see the three guys behind me have caught up.

I become embarrassed and shyly say, “Thank you.” 

I quietly say, “If you guys want to play through, please do.  I’m moving kind of slow.”  A cracked nervous smile comes across my face.  “I’m new to this and am taking my time practicing.”

The guy who spoke says, “Ok.  We knew you were in front of us, but could not tell how far.  We didn’t want to throw our drives for fear of hitting you.”  He smiles warmly to me and I nod in thanks.  They head back to the tee box.  The same guy turns and says, “We could use a fourth, if you’re interested.  Nothing serious here, just out for a bit of fun.”  I watch him as he checks me out from head to toe.  He smiles again, and heads back with his buddies. 

I watch them leave.  He seems pretty nice, but then Cole says most disc golfers are pretty laid back.  He’s about 5’ 7”, 165lbs, with dirty blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail.  Couldn’t see his eyes due to his sunglasses, but he has a slight build, typical of some disc golfers.  I walk to the next tee mulling over their offer.

I squat down and see the fairway in front of me.  Trees litter the path to the hole.  This hole is a dogleg to the left, with a Mando.  A Mando means you must throw your disc past that point before it can be thrown at the basket.  It keeps players from taking an easy straight shot at the hole and makes the hole harder by forcing them to make a harder shot.  The Mando is 40 yds from the tee.  The hole is only 15 yards to the left of the Mando.  But with all the trees in the fairway, getting to the Mando will be hard.  Looking at the trees, I can see all the knicks and buts in the bark from where discs have hit them and careened off to the sides. 

I’m lost in my thoughts when I hear a disc clang in the basket of the 3^rd hole.  I stand, mull over the offer one more time and decide to take them up on it.  They seem to know what they’re doing and I could use any tips they offer.

They walk over as a group, pull off their sunglasses, and introduce themselves.  The one who spoke to me introduces himself as Luke.  His buddies are Mark, and Parker.  I introduce myself and say, “If you want to play thru, that’s fine, but I wouldn’t mind playing with you.”  They all smile.

Luke comes to my side and says, “He can play with me.  I need the help.”  Mark and Parker roll their eyes, and put their glasses back on. 

Mark says, “Fine, you picked teams, we shoot first.”  We all nod ok. 

Parker adds, “The team not winning the hole, we’ll call them ‘losers’, he air-quotes this, “gets to choose tee box or basket on the next hole.” We all nod.  I pray I don’t hold Luke back. 

Luke chirps at the guys, “Ok kids, let’s get this going, we’re losing sunlight.” 

Mark and Parker step up to the tee, take a look at the hole, and talk between themselves.  Luke turns to me and quietly says, “Ok, they’re both pretty good.  Mark has the drive and Parker is the putter.  Their mid-range and approach are, how should we say, ‘lacking’.  So, if they aren’t in the fairway, or get stuck behind a tree, we need to be on point and take advantage, especially in the woods.”  I nod.  He looks me over again and says, “I watched your drives on the first two holes.  Not bad.  You’ve definitely got the power to make the disc sail, but on this hole, we need finesse to avoid the trees.”  I nod again.  “When Anthony designed the course,” Guessing he’s friends with the guy, “he really wanted to have some fun.  Some of the holes are flat out easy, others, like this one, you need to use a gentle hand.”   He winks at me. 

We turn back to see the others looking at us.  Parker says, “You guys done plotting?”  We all chuckle. 

Parker steps up, looks up the fairway, goes back to his bag, and pulls out a neon yellow driver.  Luke calls out to him, “Really?  I’m not helping you find your Firebird if you bury it in a pile of leaves.”

Parker replies without looking, “Don’t you worry, Lukie Luke, this is my lucky disc.”  Luke turns to me, rolls his eyes and shakes his head from side to side.  I grin cautiously.

He gets into position, flexes his knees, twists his right arm around his body, then smoothly pulls it across his chest.  The disc sails out, is about 8 feet off the ground, and has a nice straight flight path, right into the fourth tree, about 20 yards out.  It glances off the right side of the tree and then hits another tree, pinballing to the left.  It lands in a pile of leaves and branches.  I feel Luke elbow me in the ribs.  He calls out with a sarcastic tone “I got it.”  Parker turns and gives him the finger.  I smile to myself. 

Mark moves to the tee and has white driver in his right hand.  His stance is a little different than Parker’s.  He’s angled to the right a bit more.  He uses a right-hand forehand drive.  It comes out clean and starts out going to the right.  It narrowly misses a number of trees.  30 yards out it starts to hook left.  It lands about 10 feet from the Mando.  I call out, “Nice drive.”

“Thanks.” Mark replies.

Luke turns and says, “I’d like you to drive first.”  I nod and grab my disc.  I get into the tee box area and check out my line of sight.  The fairway does not favor righties or lefties.  I decide to go with a forehand shot and pray I avoid the trees.  I remember Luke’s advice and don’t go with a full throw.  I flex my knees and inhale.  I glance at my line, then exhale, and throw the disc.  It comes out flat and clean, starts out right, and follows a similar path to Parkers.  The hook starts a bit sooner than I’d hoped and it lands 15 feet behind his. 

“Well done.” I hear Luke say.  I nod. 

Luke gets into the tee area and wastes no time throwing his disc.  It flies out and twists and turns, seemingly avoiding all the trees as if by magic.  It lands past the Mando sign and gives us a clear shot at the hole.  Parker groans and says, “He has all the luck.  Any other time and he’s chopping wood with the rest of us.”  They all laugh.  We head out. 

Luke asks, “What made you want to learn how to play?”

I reply, “My boyfriend plays and said it would be fun and good exercise.”

“I don’t know about the fun part.”  He says with a chuckle, “But I won’t argue about the exercise part.  We normally play two or three times a week.”  I think to myself, that’s dedication, like me being at the gym almost every day. “There are quite a few courses in the area, you just have to look them up.”  I nod.  We approach my disc and I pick it up. 

We stand there as Mark and Parker scout out their next shot.  They still need to get around the Mando to our left, and then around the clump of Birch trees, to get to the hole.  They quickly make a decision and take their shots.  Mark throws a right-handed backhand on a hard angle.  It starts out right, but comes shooting back to the left past the trees.  It lands in the soft ground, imbedding itself into the soft dirt.  Luke cheerfully yells out, “I got it.”  Mark turns and gives him the finger.  I grin.  Parker gets into position to shoot a left-handed forehand, which is basically the same show Mark took, but with the other hand.  He doesn’t use full force, and the shot comes out of his hand at a very nice angle.  It skirts around the trees and lands two feet from the hole.  He turns and bows to us in dramatic fashion.  We all laugh.

Luke and I move to his disc and he says, “The hole is about 30 feet away and there is a small tree in our path.  How is your putting?”

I snort and say, “Dude, remember, first time out.  My putting is atrocious.”  He winces. “I’ll do my best, but I make no promises.” He nods.  I get into position, study the line, and realize, being left-handed is not a benefit right now.  There is a clump of Evergreen trees to the left and a small Maple straight ahead.  I study the area to the right of the Maple and think I can sneak it around.  I grab my Shark, get into a forehand shot position, and take some warm up motions.  I wind up and let my left arm come across my chest with the disc at a 60-degree angle.  It comes out quickly, too quickly it turns out.  The disc shoots into the trees on the right, hits a bunch of branches, and drops down. 

I curse to myself but hear Luke calmly say, “Don’t worry Jake, that’s why you have a partner.”  I feel him pat my back.  I move off and he steps up.  He studies the line, adjusts his feet, and takes his shot. The disc comes out of his hand smoothly and sails around the Maple tree.  He lands right next to Parker’s disc.  I sigh with relief.

We putt out and tie.

We continue to play. I loosen up as we go on and start to get the hang of it.  Once we’re out of the woods, the guys really show me their stuff.  Quite a few holes are wide open, straight fairways, with some rough on either side.  There is a hole which basically goes up a hill at a 50-degree angle.  The next on goes down the hill, but a gentler slope.  This hole also has a double Mando right off the tee box.  You need to drive thru a thin opening in a tree line, then the hole is 100 yards down the slope.  You can clearly see the basket from the tee box, but the narrow opening makes the first shot the all the more nerve racking.

All in all, not a bad round once we finish.  The guys ask me to join them for a beer, but I decline.  I have to get back to the estate to see how Zander and CK are making out.  We have a family coming in for Easter, and I need to be sure the house is set to go.

I make the trip back in about half an hour.  I see Luke in my rear-view mirror. He’s driving an older black 4 door Honda, probably a Civic.  He turns off two exits before I get to town.  Guess he lives in the area somewhere. 

I get back to the estate and see Zander’s pickup in the driveway, but CK’s is missing.  I continue up to the house and see it parked out front.  There’s a load of branches and debris in the bed.  We had a particularly bad winter, with more snow than usual, and a few ice storms.  We lost a few trees and some others dropped branches onto the paths. 

I am very grateful Zander decided to take the job.  Cole’s brother, formal name is Alexander, shortened version is Zander, Cole’s nickname for him is ‘Z’, is a master carpenter and has a great sense of style and business.  He started in early February, after we negotiated terms.  Cole, CK, and I went down to his Media Penna apartment and had him packed up and ready to go in 2 days.  Cole and I spent some time with his parents and his sister’s family.  Michele, her husband, and the boys were great.  We had dinner with them on their back patio.  Burgers and beers.  Relaxed atmosphere, easy conversation.  The next day, we had lunch with his parents at a local restaurant.  Let’s just say, night and day compared to dinner.  His mom was polite, but had an air about her.  She’d look at me, then Cole, then back to me.  I guess she was trying to determine what we saw in each other.  His dad was a little looser, but that was only after a double Maker’s Mark bourbon, neat. She led the conversation and kept it on Zander and Michele.  Questions she asked me were basically yes or no answers.  Once answered, she’d move on the next one.  I now see why Cole doesn’t come home a whole lot.

After lunch we met Zander and CK and helped with the packing.  Once done, we hightailed it out of there. It was a 5 ½ hour drive back to upstate NY from southeast PA. Cole and I in one pickup, CK and Z in the other.  The moment we got on the road, Cole apologized for his parent’s behavior, but I told him, it was fine.  He was upset for about an hour.  Once we got on the Northeast extension of the PA turnpike, his mood seemed to lighten.  He made some jokes and called Michele and told her about the lunch fiasco.  I could hear her groaning and laughing on the other end.

It took dad, mom, and myself to talk CK into working at the estate.  He was hesitant, like I was, but he came around once we indicated that Cole’s brother would be working there as well and that he’d have as much freedom as he wanted to do other things, when the house was empty. 

CK and Z took to each other like elementary school buddies.  Z moved in right away and took one of the spare bedrooms.  CK was still living in town with Steve.  He started spending nights at the estate when he started to redo Nona’s bedroom to his own.  They are slowly replacing the older furniture with more updated pieces.  Some stuff CK asked to keep in the house, just for memories sake.  Zander had no problems with the request.

I wander thru the flower garden, making sure the weeds have been pulled, then out to the pool area.  They vacuumed and shocked it.  The patio is clear of debris and the table and chairs are out and washed. I poke my head into the workout room and see the towels are washed and folded.  The equipment has been wiped down and there are fresh linens in the cabinet.

I wander around to the dining room patio.  Memories of me sitting in the wrought iron chair, depressed about Nona dying come flooding back.  So does the memory of Cole getting in my face and threatening to use a crane to move my ass to go see Tiny.  I feel a tear form, then a smile.  I wipe the tear away and enter the house thru the French doors.  I can hear a vacuum upstairs.  I quickly check the downstairs rooms to make sure everything in done.  I spot one or two little things out of place.  I fix them and make a mental note to let CK and Z know. 

I see the spreadsheet they created on the kitchen island.  It was a great idea and I don’t know why I didn’t think of it first.  Then I say to myself, ‘That’s right, I had Nona’.  She would have frowned at the idea.  She knew exactly what needed to be done, how long it should take, and the best order in which to do it.  I pull out my phone and send Cole a quick text, ‘Things are going well here at the big house. I may be home earlier than I thought.’  I include a few winking emoji.  I continue walking around, make my way upstairs and see CK is busy cleaning the last of the bedrooms.  I look in and give him a nod.  He nods back.  He’s got his earbuds in and I can only imagine what he’s listening to.

As I head back down, I feel my phone buzz.  I see Cole replied with a few ‘shocked face’ emoji.  I head out the front door and see Z coming around the corner with a leaf blower, clearing the remaining debris from the sidewalk and brick paved driveway.  He shuts it off and we talk for a few minutes. 

“Yeah, got the pool, pool house, paths, and pond area cleared.  CK is in charge of the house this time.”

I see him mentally cross items of a list in his head. He adds, “I’m going to head up the back path to the ridge line and make sure there are no branches in the path.”

“Sounds good to me.” We shake and I jump in my pickup and take off. 

I get back to the condo and hustle up the steps, thinking of new ways to entertain my man.  I feel my thickening unit bounce in my shorts and bang against my hairy inner thigh.  I put the key in the lock and when I open the door, I see a brand-new Cole standing in front of me.  I stare at him for what seems like forever, but is only a second or two.  He has a crooked, insecure smile on his face.  His pale blue eyes stare into my deep green ones looking for approval. 

I take the one step to him, to bring us together, and quietly ask, “Why?”  He’s given himself a crewcut haircut.  He had been letting his straight blonde hair grow ever since he got here, over a year ago.  He was at the point where he could put it in a ponytail and actually look sexier then when it hung loose. I gently run the fingers of my left hand up his right cheek and around his ear.  He closes his eyes and sighs. I see all his hair on the floor and cannot believe how much there is.  I move my hand to back of his head and softly massage his scalp. I lean in and kiss him gently on his lips.  He kisses me back.  I back up, but keep my hand on his head. 

He opens his eyes and hesitantly says, “I just felt like it was time for a change.”  He’s shaking. “What do you think?” he asks nervously.

I confidently say, “Dude, I like it.”  He smiles a bit.  “With summer right around the corner, a new shorter look is just what you need.” He cocks an eyebrow at me and I do it right back.  “Just think, when we’re in the middle of our next hot, lust filled, sweaty, pig grunting sex marathon, you’ll no longer have to take a break to tie your hair up, or apologize for smacking me in the face as you thrash around on the bed while I pound your cute, tight pink hole.”

He rolls his eyes and sarcastically says, “Well, since it’s all about you…” he reaches his left hand to my wavy brown hair and says, “We can trim your locks up right now.”  He turns and grabs the clippers from the table behind him. 

“Whoa, whoa, there blonde.”  I take a step back and put my hands up in front of me, palms out.  “I like my hair just as it is.”  He takes a step closer and clicks the clippers on.  The loud buzzing noise is enough to make me take another step back.  I back into the door behind me.  He comes closer, raises the clippers, and moves it toward me.

At the last second, he turns them off. He leans in and gives me a soft kiss.  “Don’t worry Monster, I wouldn’t touch a hair on your head, or the rest of your wonderfully hirsute muscled body.”  I breathe a sigh of relief.  “You’re perfect just the way you are.”  We kiss again.  He pats me on the chest. 

As he turns to put the clippers back on the table, I come up behind him and pull him in to a hug.  I whisper, “I do like the cut Cole.  You look just as sexy as you always do.”  I lick his left ear.  I feel his body shiver.  My unit responds. I tighten my grip around his waist and my right-hand wanders down his rock-hard abs to the top of his dark blue mesh gym shorts.  I whisper again, “What do you say we jump into a nice warm shower and I help you wash off any loose hair?”  I find his expanding unit and give it a soft tug.  He melts back into my arms.  I move quickly, bend my knees, and scoop him up.  My man has added a few pounds of muscle, but is still light as a feather to me. 

I walk us down the short hallway to the master bedroom, then right into our bath.  I set him down and we both quickly strip.  He turns the shower, then turns to me for a quick make-out session while the water warms up.  He steps close and puts his arms on my boulder shoulders.  He intertwines his fingers and pulls himself a bit closer.  We kiss.  Gently at first.  I wrap my hands around his lower back and pull his warm body to mine.  His tongue invades my mouth.  We playfully tongue wrestle, swapping spit.  He continues to kiss me and I feel his unit growing, pushing up against my furry abs.  I sense pre-cum has escaped him.  Of course, it could be mine as I’m just as turned on as he is.  He breaks our kiss, steps back, and pulls his hands off my shoulders.  I release him from my hold.  He takes my hand and leads me to the shower.  The door is fogged up and steam is rising over the top of the glass panels.  He opens it and steps in.  I move in after him. 

It’s a snug fit, but we make it work.  He moves under the shower head and grabs the bottle of shampoo.  I put my hand out and he squeezes some into it.  I smile, lean in, and give him another kiss.  I lean back, rub my hands together to get a lather going, then move them to his head.  I spread the shampoo around, massage his scalp, and gently tug on his hair, to pull out any loose ones. He moves closer to me, wraps his arms around my body and attaches them to my lats.  As I continue to massage his scalp, he slowly moves his body up and down my hairy chest and across my sensitive nipples.  His hairless body feels so smooth and slippery.  I take a deep breath and inhale his scent as well as the shampoo and the bodywash we use. 

My brain clicks and without thinking about it, my hands move down his back to his crack.  I grab a cheek in each hand, spread them, then carefully insert the index finger on my left hand into his hole.  His body moves upward on mine as he is surprised by the invasion.  Once he is used to me being in him, he slides back down.  I wiggle my finger.  He moans.  He tightens his grip on my lats, pulls himself upward again and closer.  I feel his thick unit pulsing against my abs.  I start to maneuver my finger in and out of him.  He leans his head against my shoulder and I hear a low growl of a moan escape him.

My biceps expand to hold him in place. I quicken my pace. Another groan emanates from deep inside of him.  I grope his left ass cheek with my right hand.  I’m feel like I’m kneading dough.  He tries to flex his ass, but my hands are too strong.  I pull him closer, then push another finger into him.  I feel his teeth on my clavicle as he attempts to nibble my shoulder. I alternate moving my fingers in and out of him.  His moans are constant now.  He finally gives in and releases his hands from my lats.  His body comes away from mine and my fingers are pushed completely into him.  As he settles back onto them, his head comes to rest on the shower wall.  His eyes are squeezed shut and his unit is standing straight up. 

I easily hold his weight in my hands.  I wiggle my fingers a few more times in his ass and feel his body tense.  I watch as he squeezes his closed eyes even tighter and then it happens.  His unit jerks as his load explodes out of him.  Four ropes of cum fly out of him. Most of it lands on his wet chest and abs, but some of it makes to my body.

The warm shower washes most of it away.  I sigh, upset that I won’t be able to lick his load off him, but know I’ll get his next one.  After he recovers and his unit softens, I slip my fingers out of him.  He pushes off the back wall, gives me a kiss, then rinses his hair.  He grabs the bodywash, lathers up, then lathers me up as well.  We rinse off, turn the water off, and step out of the shower into the now steamy bathroom.  He chuckles and says, “There goes the water bill for the month.”  I smile back at him. 

He wraps the towel around his midsection, wipes the mirror clean and takes a look at his handy work. He runs hands over his scalp, feeling it for the first time.  He smiles, turns to me, and says, “I like it.” 

I nod and say, “So do I.”  We kiss again.  He takes me by the hand and leads me to the bedroom.

 

We emerge from the bedroom sometime later, after freshening up, and move to the kitchen to figure out what to make for dinner.  I check my phone and see a text message from an unknown number.  I open the message and it says, ‘Hey Jake, this is Luke, from disc golf today.  I got your number off one of your discs.  Wanted to see if you wanted to play again sometime?  Thought we had a good time.  Shoot me a note.’  I consider the message. I had fun, but it may be a one and done adventure.

Cole comes up behind me, wraps his arms around my waist, and puts his head on my shoulder.  “So, what’s the message?  New man in your life?”  He chuckles.

“You wish.”  He laughs again.  “No, just a guy I ran into today playing disc golf.”  Cole releases me and moves around to be in front of me.  He raises an eyebrow, with his characteristic ‘do tell’ look.  “It’s nothing Cole.  Just met up with some guys on the course.  I was hesitant to join them, but did, and ended up having a good time.”  I smile, realizing it wasn’t so bad.  I take a deep breath.  “Luke, the guy I played with, wants to know if I want to play again.”

A big smile comes over Cole’s face.  “That’s great!  Maybe I could come out and play a round too, if that would be ok with you?”  He gives one of his crooked smiles again, hoping I’ll say yes.  I just shrug my shoulders.

We go back to making dinner and making small talk.  Work, Workout, Tiny, the weather, the estate.  He subtly tries to maneuver disc golf back in to the conversation, but I deftly deflect him.  I can see him growing frustrated.  He finally gives up. After cleaning up, we move the living room and pull up a show on the Firestick.  ‘The Expanse’.  We are midway thru the second season. Cole says it’s based on a series of books by the same name. I’m actually enjoying it.  Story is taking off and I’m really enjoying the effort they made to ‘world build’ around the story.  Instead of just some cheap back ground effects, they took the time to build sets to match the descriptions from the books, according the Cole.  The whole ‘proto-molecule’ concept is definitely new ground for me.

We make it thru two episodes and I feel myself start to nod.  I glance at Cole and see he’s out like a light.  Not sure how I missed that.  I turn off the TV.  I carefully get off our three-piece sectional sofa, lean down, and scoop him up.  His eyes flutter open, but only for a second.  I carry him the bedroom and put him on the bed.  I go back to the living room and shut off the lights, make sure the door is locked, turn off the kitchen lights, and head back.  Cole has turned over and is face down on top of the dark blue comforter. Head on his pillows.  I see his back rising and lowering at a steady pace.  My man is out for the night. I strip down to my birthday suit and crawl onto the bed next to him.  I lay on my side and let the fingers of my left hand gently caress his back thru his black mesh t-shirt.  After a moment, I turn over, plop my head on my pillow, and put my hands behind my head, flexing my biceps.  I think about the day and decide to give disc golf another chance. 

A few days pass and I see the weather for tomorrow, Thursday, is going to be very nice, high 60’s, light breeze, and not very cloudy.  I mention this to Cole and ask if he’d like to play a round. His interest is piqued and he says he’ll need to see if he can get some time off in the afternoon on short notice.

I head to the estate to make sure things are in order.  The guests are scheduled to arrive later today and will be here thru Tuesday.  On my way over I give CK and call.  With a chipper tone I say, “Hey bro, how’s it going today?”

He sounds groggy, “Not too bad…” ‘cough, cough’. 

The first thought through my mind, ‘He’s got a cold.’  “You don’t sound so good.  Everything ok?”

He croaks out, “Yeah, fine.”  I groan to myself. “If I need to confess, I spent a bit too much time at the bar last night with Mary.” I roll my eyes.

I think, ‘Ok, I can deal with that.’  I try not to sound to bossy, but say, “Ok CK.  Will you be ok to get everything done and the estate today?  The guests are arriving later and I need to be sure the house it set.”  I pause for a moment and run their list thru my head.  “Just mowing the lower meadow and making a run to the store to stock up on items they requested, right?”

“Yeah, sounds about right.”  He says quietly.  “I think Z is doing the grocery run in a little while.”

“Hmm, can you check with him?”  I’m beginning to feel Nona’s pain when she was dealing with me.

He responds and I can hear a bit of testiness in it, “Yes Monster, I will shoot him a text when we hang up.”

As professionally as I can, I reply, “Thanks CK.  I hope you feel better.”  He disconnects quickly. 

I continue to the estate as there is stuff I need to do anyway.  As I’m pulling in, I see Z coming the other way.  We meet just inside the security gate.  I roll down my window and so does he.  I casually say, “Hey Z, everything ok?”  He rolls his eyes, knowing that I know what’s up.  “Yeah, talked to CK a bit ago.  Guessing you’re doing the grocery run?”  He nods and I can tell there’s a problem.  “I’ll talk to him.”

“I don’t want to cause a problem between you two.”

I chuckle and say, “We’ve had our moments since he and Steve were born.”  Z smiles a knowing smile. “It’ll be fine.  He’ll be pissy for a day or two, then realize I am right, and get over it.”  Z opens his mouth, but I beat him to it.  “There will be no blow back on you.  He may not seem like it, but he is an adult, and will man up in the end.”

“Cool.  You still be here in an hour or so?”

“Not sure.  Depends on what I find.  You guys work well together and your system works well too.  Hopefully I’ll be gone.”  I wink to him.  He smiles back.

I get to the cottage, see CK’s truck is gone, and pull in.  I go to the office on the main floor and turn the computer on.  I run some reports, check the budget, and see if there are any new emails.  Everything looks good.  I pull the reports, send a copy of the budget back to the Cole’s old company, who owns the property, and run the payroll program.  I shut everything down, go to the storage shed and start up one of the UTV’s.  I make a quick run thru the lower paths and around the pond.  Everything looks good.  I make the long trek up the back path to the upper ridge line. I think to myself, ‘How did Nona and Pappy handle a 900-acre estate with so many paths all by themselves?’ The branches and other debris have been removed. 

As I come down the path toward the backside of the house, I see CK on it, clearing the remaining debris.  He looks ok, but then, he and Steve were always able to hide their hang-overs well. 

I hop off the UTV and ask, “Need some help?” He shrugs.  I move to a larger branch, squat down, and lift if up.  I carry it to his trailer and set it in.  I go back, grab some more, and help him load it up.  Five minutes later the path is clear. I scan the area see it’s clear as well.  I turn to him.  “We good?”  He winks.  I climb back in my UTV and head out. 

I get back to the cottage, determine I’m not too sweaty, but run a cool towel over my neck and forehead to get rid of any grime.  I check my phone and see a message from Cole and one from Luke.  I check Luke’s first.  He’s asking about playing, again.  I send a quick note back letting him know I’m going to play tomorrow with a friend.  As I head out to my pickup, I check Cole’s note and see he was able to get some time off.  I smile as I get in.  I send him a smiley emoji. 

The rest of the day flies by, gym, lunch, back to the condo to do some cleaning. 

It’s late afternoon when I get the text from Z.  The guests have arrived.  He drove up to the house and introduced himself and did the standard walk-thru with them.  Unlike Cole, they will have full access to the TV, internet, etc. 

I start to make dinner.  Cole comes home around 5:30 and dinner is almost ready.  He quickly changes and helps me finish. 

We sit and start to eat.  He asks, “So, are you excited for tomorrow?” I smile and nod ‘yes’.  He smiles back.  He reaches his right hand out and I put my left hand on top of it.  “It’ll be fun.  Gorgeous day, gorgeous man, toss some discs around, maybe a bit of fun afterwards?”  He raises an eyebrow to me, then winks. 

I decide to have some fun with him.  I seriously say, “If by fun, you mean hitting the gym for an intense hour-long push work-out, I’m all for it!”  He rolls his eyes and me and just shakes his head. I push my chest out and incredulously ask, “Tomorrow is bench day for me.  Did you mean something different?” 

“No, no.  You have fun with that, getting all hot and sweaty.”  He waves his hand at my chest and biceps.  “I’ll be here…watching ‘videos’” He air quotes videos “…getting all hot and sweaty on my own.”  He pops a piece of broccoli into his mouth.

1pm Thursday.  I meet Cole at his office, soon to be my office too, and we drive over to the course. Some nice foreplay by Cole to put his left hand on my right thigh as I drove.  I could almost feel him squeezing my leg, but kept tensing the muscle to frustrate him.  We arrive at the park and see very few cars there, which makes me happy.  Not too many people to bother us.  We walk to the first tee and do some light stretching and warm ups to loosen our joints. 

Cole says he’ll throw first so I don’t have to deal with the nervousness of it.  I am appreciative. His shot goes sailing down the fairway and lands 20 feet from the hole.  Never knew he was this good, but it is only his first shot.  I step onto the tee box and close my eyes.  I remember the instructions from the videos I watched and what I did last time out.  As I open my eyes, I check my positioning, and then throw the disc.  It sails out and has a beautiful flight path. It is similar to Coles, but not quite as far.  I end up 35 feet from the hole, much better than last time.

He compliments me as we set out, “Very nice throw Monster.  Are you holding out on me?”  I glance over to him and see a sly look in my direction.

“You wish.” I chuckle.  “It was a lucky throw with a favorable breeze from behind us.”

He walks closer to me and slips and arm around my waist.  He gently says, “Jake, you’ll do fine.  It’s not a competition.” I think to myself, ‘Yeah, right’.  “We’re here to have some fun.”  I feel him pat my ass and cop a feel.  I flex my glutes. 

We get to my disc and I pull out my gray Shark approach disc.  I can sense he is watching what I do.  I turn to him and say, “You know, this 6’3” oaf would appreciate and tips and guidance from the young stallion he’s playing with.”

Cole lets out a tear inducing laugh and says through stifled giggles, “Yeah, on it big guy.” I smile back at him and take my approach shot.  I land about 15 feet from the hole.  Cole walks up to me and asks, “Why did you use such a steep angle for the shot?”

“I didn’t want to over shoot the hole.”

“Ok, but now you’re 15 feet short and will be shooting uphill.” I nod.  “Try it again, but ease up on the angle and move your aim closer to the hole.”  He hands me another approach disc.  He stands in front of me to watch what I do.  I get into position and adjust the disc to match his advice.  “Remember, you don’t need 100% of your strength on this one.” I nod again.  “I’d say dial it back to 80 percent and aim for past the hole.”  I give him a questioning look, but he just nods at me.  I get into position again, check my alignment and do what he says.  The disc comes out nicely and floats up the fairway.  With a lower angle on it, it does not fade to the right as much.  With the 80% strength, it flies past the hole. 

I curse to myself, but Cole says, “Not to worry.  I think you’ll be very happy in a few minutes.” 

We get to his disc.  He pulls out a putter, gets into his stance, and putts out, sinking the putt with ease.  As we walk to retrieve his disc, I pick up my first disc and see my second one about 4 feet on the other side of the basket.  I turn to him and he winks at me. 

As we make our way to the 2^nd tee box, I hear a voice calling out to me.  I turn and see Luke jogging up from the parking lot. I sigh to myself.  I was hoping to have a quiet round with Cole.  Luke gets to the tee box and through winded breaths says, “Yo Jake.  How’s it going?”  He sees Cole and I can see him do a quick once over of my boyfriend.  I see a quick frown, then he turns back to me and cheerfully asks, “Room for one more?”

I really want to say no, but I glance at Cole and he shrugs his shoulders with an ‘I don’t care’ motion. I take my lead from Cole and say, “Actually Luke, we just want to play a few holes so I can get some practice in.”  Luke sighs and I want to believe he is actually disappointed, but something tells me he is not. 

His body language changes a bit and he says, “Ok.  Do you mind if I jump in front of you then?” 

Cole automatically says, “Yeah, that may be best.  We’re going to be moving slow.”

“Thanks.”  Luke shrugs off his backpack, quickly pulls out a driver and gets onto the tee box.  He takes a few warm-up swings, then lets his disc fly.  It sails out into the fairway, nearly ¾’s of the way to the hole.  He turns, smiles, and says, “Have fun guys.”  He gets his backpack and walks onto the fairway.  When he gets to his disc, he does his approach shot, and disappears from view.  So after, we hear the chains on the basket clang. 

Cole turns to me, scowls, and says, “That guy has some issues.”  I look at him with a raised eyebrow. Cole, never one to mince words, “He wants you.”  I laugh.  “Monster, it’s true or paint me green.”  I chuckle again.  “Didn’t you see the way he was ogling you, or the distain he had for me?  I saw it in the two seconds he took to check me out.  He clearly wanted me to go away.” 

I reply calmly, “Yes, I did see the way he looked at you.  Not sure he wants you ‘to go away’ as you so elegantly put it.”  Now it’s Cole’s turn to sigh.  “He may be jealous that you have a smoking hot boyfriend, but that’s it.”

Cole rolls his eyes.  He points to the tee box and says with dripping sarcasm, “Would the perfect boyfriend like to tee off first?”

I give it right back to him, “Only if the 2^nd most perfect boyfriend would critique his throw.”  We both laugh.  I lean over and give him a kiss on the cheek. 

I tee off, he tees off.  We walk to our shots and make casual conversation.  He gives me pointers on how to improve my shots.  As the round progresses, we don’t see much of Luke.  When we get out of the woods and into the open area, we see him 2 holes in front of us.  He’s looking in some trees and then in the brush surrounding them.  It would seem he’s lost a disc.  We continue to play, not thinking too much of it.  Cole says it happens quite often and most people usually find the disc, or will put a post on the Facebook page for the course.  He also says most courses have ‘lost disc drop box’.  

We eventually catch up and Luke is still searching for his disc.  Cole leans over to me and quietly says with a serious tone, “I think he’s just waiting for you.”  I quickly turn and look at him, disbelieving. He says, “By this time, most people would have pulled another disc and continued play.  He’s waiting for us, or more specifically, you.”  He wraps his right arm thru my left one and pulls me close.  “We can offer to help, but let’s not take too long, if we do.” 

“Cole, you’re too skeptical.”  I turn to look at him and take his right hand in my left.  I caress the top of his hand with my thumb.  “Yes, I’ve seen the way he looks at me.  It also happened when I met him last week.”  I take a breath and say, “It’s happened to me for most of my life.  I’m a big muscular guy…”  Cole rolls his eyes at me, “I’m not bragging or boasting, but I’ve had to deal with people like Luke on an ongoing basis.  If I say so myself,” I puff out my chest and the fabric on my black Doctor Who t-shirt expands to the breaking point, “I’m pretty good and fending them off.  Or at least I was until a particularly cute blonde-haired, blue-eyed guest at the estate caught my eye while wandering along a wooded path.”  I wiggle both my eyebrows at him a few times.

He puts his left hand on under my left hand and says, “Ok Monster.  Your call on this, but please, let’s find his disc and move on.”  I nod ok.  He smiles and we lean in for another kiss.  I feel his right hand wander up my left forearm, then bicep.  I give it a playful flex and feel him grasp the muscle.  I bounce it a few times, and when we break our kiss.  He playfully says, “I know a way to get your push workout in and we don’t even have to go to the gym.”  I smile knowing what he means.  I nod to him.  

“Ok, let’s go help him and make this our last hole.” He nods to me.  We wander to Luke who is about 50 feet from the tee box area and I call out, “Lose a disc, Luke?” 

He turns and with an angry growl says, “Yeah, my favorite Innova neon green Mamba distance driver.”  Most of what he says just goes right on past me, but I can tell from Cole’s look, it’s a good disc.  I saw it fly into this area, but cannot find it.  Of course, it’s blueish green, so it blends in with everything.”  

We start to look for it.  Cole wanders into the brush under the trees, pushing weeds and pricker bushes away with his legs.  I scan the trees to make sure it’s not stuck in one.  Luke widens the area and checks the meadow on both sides of the tree line. 

After a few minutes we hear Cole call out, “Found it.”  He comes back thru the weeks holding the disc in his hand.  He’s got a look on his face which tells me something is up.  Luke comes around the corner and Cole tosses him the disc and calmly says, “It was under a bush about 10 yards in.  I can see why you couldn’t find it.”  He’s lying, I can tell.  Now I know something is up.

“Oh my God, thank you so much.”  He holds the disc and checks it out to see if there are any scratches or marks on it.  He looks at me and says, “Well, now that you’re here, want to finish the round together?”  He’s good, very mild mannered about it, but Cole’s right, he got eyes for me. 

Cole chimes in, walks to me, slips his right arm around my left forearm, and says, “I think we’re good to finish on our own.”  Luke’s look tells me he’s not happy.  “I’m still showing Jake a few things.” 

Luke quickly brushes it off and says, “Nice.”  He looks at me and says, “If you ever want to play another round, Mark, Parker, and I would welcome you as a fourth.”   I stiffen up.

Luke lines up his shot, takes it, grabs his bag, and wanders down the hill.  He turns one last time and glances at us. 

I quietly say to Cole, “You’re right.  Let’s get our discs and take off now.”  He pats me on the arm. 

We get back to my pickup and drive out of the parking lot.  Cole says out of the blue, “His disc was not under a bush Jake, it was sitting on the path, waiting for someone to find it.” I nod, upset with myself for not trusting Cole earlier.  “He’s got your number, right?”  I nod yes.  “Did he say how he got it?”

“Off one of my discs last week.”  I try to remember back to when he would have had one of them for any length of time to see my number, and memorize it, or maybe get a photo of it.

“…best if you blocked him on your phone.”  I catch the last part of what he says.

I softly say, “Yeah, you’re probably right.”  Cole grabs my phone from the seat, opens it, and jumps to the text message app.  I watch from the corner of my eye as he scrolls thru the list, finds the text, then deftly blocks the number. 

He closes the phone, puts it on the seat, and pats me on the bicep.  “You can thank me later.”  I smile to myself.

 

Luke’s point of view.

‘Not sure why you had to bring your boyfriend.’  I grumble in my head. ‘I could have given you all the help you needed.’  I walk away from them slowly, hoping Jake will change his mind and invite me to play with them.  ‘Maybe I should call Parker and see if he can get here quickly.  He could be Jake’s boyfriend’s partner.’ 

I quickly text Parker and anxiously wait for him to reply.  When he does, it’s not with good news.  He cannot get away from work on such short notice.  I think, ‘Dammit dude, I need you today.’  I calm down and think of another way to spend a few minutes with Jake.  ‘Maybe at hole eleven.  There are plenty of tree and brush.   I could lose my disc and when Jake finds it, he would accept my gratitude and if I asked to play, well how could he say no?’  I can feel a woody develop in my shorts at the prospect. 

‘Just like last week when I got to be close and personal with the muscle man of my dreams.  Mark and Parker were so off base in telling me to leave him be. Jake and I were a natural team.  We played so well together.  He’s still new to the game, but with my knowledge and his size and strength, we could win tournaments all over the area.’ I smile to myself with my simple, yet effective plan. 

I continue to play and keep an ear out for Jake.   I can hear them a few holes back as their discs clang into the baskets. 

I get to eleven and just walk straight to the tree line.  I walk into the brush a bit and toss my neon green Mamba onto the path to the left.  I begin to pace around waiting for them to emerge from the wooded area.  ‘What’s taking them so God-dammed long?’  My frustration builds.  ‘It shouldn’t take them this long to get through the woods.  I don’t care how new to the sport you are.’  They finally emerge.  I quickly turn around and begin to move some branches around as if I’m looking for my disc.

Ten long minutes later I hear Jake call out asking if I’ve lost my disc.  I say yes and they offer to help.  Step 1 down.  I move to the tee box side of the tree line and watch as Jake looks in the trees. ‘Come on you big muscular oaf, why the fuck would you think my disc is in a God-dammed tree?’  I roll my eyes.  A few minutes later I hear his boyfriend call out, “Found it.”  I think, ‘Of course you did, you blonde boob, it was sitting on the path.’  I rejoin them and the boyfriend says the disc was under a bush.  ‘Crap, he’s onto me.’ 

I play it cool and put step 2 into motion.  I thank them again and ask if they want to join me.  They say no.  A voice in the back of my mind says, ‘Leave it alone Luke.’  The boyfriend speaks up and again says they’d like to play on their own.  I decide to agree, for now.  I take my next shot, making sure Jake can get a good look and my ass and legs.  I squat to get my bag, then head down the hill.  I’m about 20 yards off and glance back, hoping he’s changed his mind and wants to play with me.  They’re just watching me go.  ‘Dammit. I pushed too hard.’  I start to run thru what I did wrong.

I take my next shot and put it 5 feet from the hole.  I turn back and don’t see them.  “Oh fuck! Where’d they go?” I say out loud.  The tree line keeps me from seeing them, if they decided to leave, which is what has probably happened.  I pick up my disc, forget about putting out and hurry back towards the parking lot.   I get there too late.  His pickup is gone. 

I get to my black Honda and toss my backpack onto the passenger seat.  I start the car, then turn it off.  I close my eyes and take a few deep breaths.  I need to relax and let this pass.  ‘Jake’s a great looking guy, but so is his boyfriend.  The way they walked hand in hand, kissed, and kept touching each other in a playful manner.  I could do that with him too.’  Another deep breath.  ‘Jake’s taken; you need to back off.’  Another deep breath.  I pull my phone out and decide to send him a note to apologize for my behavior.  I take my time typing it out.  I re-read it two times to make sure it sounds sincere and that there are no spelling errors.  I close my eyes and hit send.  I exhale, not realizing I was holding my breath.  Almost instantly I get a message back saying the number is not valid. “‘What?!?” I mumble.  I pull up my photo gallery and check the phone number on the disc I took a photo of last week. It matches.  I resend the message and stare at the screen.  A few seconds later the same message pops up.

“Dammit Jake, why’d you have to block me?” My anger with him and his boyfriend start to build.  I pound the steering wheel a few times to let off some steam.  I lean my head back on the headrest, close my eyes and put the palms of my hands over my eyes and gently massage my face.  I take another few deep breaths, holding it for a count of 5 each time. 

I calm down.  I drive to the far end of the parking lot, where there are no other vehicles.  I park so the driver’s side if not clearly visible from passers-by. I recline the seat as much as I can and I untie the knot in my black gym shorts.  I grab my phone, open the gallery, and scroll to the pictures of Jake I took last week.  Mark and Parker told me to delete them when I showed them to them.  Now I’m glad I didn’t.

I relax and touch the first photo.  It expands to take up the whole frame.  Jake is bending over to get his disc.  His glutes are fucking perfect.  I can see striations in them, even thru his underwear and shorts.  I feel my unit pushing upward. My right hand slips down under the waistband and thru my coarse pubic hair to my thickening unit. I massage it softly. 

I deftly swipe left and a side portrait of him pops up.  His pecs stick out a good inch over his abs and waist.  I can see he perky left nipple too thru his tight t-shirt. I see the ridges of his 6 pack.  I groan as my hand encircles my unit and tugs it. It continues to grow.  It’s not fair that a man this good looking is stuck with someone so plain as that blonde with a cheap crew-cut.

The next shot is a short video of him on the tee box getting ready to drive.  He does a few practice tosses, then gets his body set.  I’m right behind him and have a clear view of his table-like upper back.  He flexes his knees then quickly rips his left arm from left to right across his body.  Every muscle is flexed and tense.  As he finishes his throw, he’s standing on just his right foot. All his weight is on that leg and I can see his obscenely flexed calf muscle holding him up.  The horseshoe shape is outrageous. I groan again and give myself a few harder tugs.

The last picture I was able to get is of him shaking hands with Mark.  I stare at it for a while as it showcases his best feature, and my favorite, his bicep.  Mark is a skinny 140-lb kid next to Jake.  Jake’s mitt of a hand completely encircles Marks’ hand.  I don’t even think he was trying to flex his ham-hock of an arm; I think it’s just naturally enormous.  His natural smile and furry face make me warm all over.  I can see his dark chest hair protruding from the top of his t-shirt.  There’s some on his forearms and just a bit on his upper arms.  I think, ‘God, I hope he doesn’t shave his groin. How’d l love to bury my face in his pubic hair and inhale his musky masculine scent, especially after a long sweaty round of disc.  I’m sure he’d have a magically smell from there and probably in his arm pits too. 

The thought of my face in his groin area, absorbing his manly odor sends me over the edge.  My load builds and I jerk myself violently three times.  Cum explodes out of me and coats my t-shirt from my chest to my uncovered belly button.  I groan again and my second and third shots spasm out of me. Not as forceful as the first, but still enough to make my shirt sticky as cum is absorbed.

As my unit softens, I smile at the photo of Jake’s flexed bicep.  I run my tongue over my upper lip and close my eyes.  ‘I need to be more careful.  Don’t be so obvious that you want him.  Let him be for a while.  You know he lives in the same town. It shouldn’t be that hard to spot a 6’3” muscle god wandering around. He obviously goes to a gym, just need to ride around town and find it.’  I smile to myself as I bring the seat back up. 

 

Jake’s point of view.

Early Easter Sunday morning.  Cole and I are up at the crack of dawn at his insistence.  He wants to make sure Tiny’s basket is ready to go and the all the eggs for the hunt are filled.  I try to tell him Tiny and his cousins getting a bit old for an Easter egg hunt.  He turns to me with an ashen face and boldly proclaims, “You can never be too old for an Easter egg hunt or dressing up for Halloween, Fischer.” I sigh knowing I’ve lost the battle. He asks, “How many cousins are taking part in the hunt again? I want to be sure there are enough eggs.” 

I say with exasperation, “About 7, Cole.  But please don’t go overboard.”  He waves a hand at me and starts to recount the eggs, for the third time.

I head back to the bedroom and slip into a pair of dark gray sweatpants and navy-blue hoodie.  I brush my teeth and put on some deodorant. As I head back to the kitchen, I feel my phone buzz and I wonder who else in their right mind is up at this hour.  It’s Rose with a quick note, ‘Hey Monster, I know you’re up because Cole is up.  Happy Easter and see you in a few hours.’  I send back a frowning emoji face.  She immediately sends back three laugh out loud faces.  I smile to myself.

“Cole, what would you like for breakfast?”  I ask once I’m back in the kitchen. 

“Just cereal.  Cheerios, if we still have any.  Maybe some strawberries.” 

Simple enough.  I pull the box down and pour two bowls.  I put milk in mine and milk in a glass for him.  I don’t see any strawberries in the fridge.  “You ok with blueberries or pineapple?”

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

“Then breakfast is ready, Mr. Patterson.”

As we sit and eat, we make small talk.  We talk about prior Easter’s and how my family would throw big parties and have lots of relatives over.  “Nona and Pappy would organize all the activities and keep track of who won which events.  There’d be prizes, not just candy, but money for some, and toys for others.” A smile comes to my face remembering those days. “As the family grew and more grandkids were added, they just kept on doing their thing.  Nothing slowed them down.  Then came the ‘big lull’ as all the cousins called it.”  Cole raises an eyebrow questioning what I mean.  I chuckle and explain, “You know how there is an enormous gap between Jen and Rose and Tiny?”  He nods, “Well, it so happens that dad’s siblings also had a ‘dry spell’, if you will, for a few years.  Some longer than others.  In those years, there’d be 15 almost adult cousins and a few younger teens, like Rose and Jen.  Then, like lightening, 10 more kids show up within 6 years.”  Cole lets out a laugh.  “Yeah, I was surprised when Tiny arrived and I was 23, but my cousin Pierce was even more surprised when his parents dropped off Mel and Shannon when he was 25.”

“Jeez dude, how many sets of twins are there in your family?”

“Five.” I say automatically. “CK and Steve, Rose and Jen, Mel and Shannon, who are the youngest. Let me see, Brian and Tommy, and Erin and Jack.”  I watch as Cole let’s out a deep breath.  “How about you?”

He just shakes his head.  “Nothing anywhere even close.  I’ve got maybe six cousins between both sides of my family.”  I smile and try to remember when we were like that.  “You met my parents.  You will understand when I say, we really didn’t do family reunions or parties, unless it was absolutely necessary, like a wedding or funeral.”  Cole looks down at his half-eaten bowl of cereal, the realization of the disparity between his growing up and mine.  He runs his fingers thru it and picks up a few.  He looks up and I see a sadness in his eyes.  He slowly eats the cereal, but his heart is not in it. 

I gently say, “Cole.” He looks up at me. “You do realize, you are part of my family now.”  He shrugs his shoulders a bit. “I know it may seem intimidating and may make you feel like you were missing out with fewer cousins, but let me say this,” He looks me in the eyes, looking for a ray of hope to help pull him out of his unhappiness. “Your family does love you and I’m sure you have tons of great memories of being with Michelle and Z and your cousins when you were together.”  He closes his eyes and a slight smile comes over his face.  He’s remembering a good time.  I add, “Also, you have one up on me…”  He gives me a questioning look, “You have two awesome nephews you get to spoil.”  That brings a smile to his face.

As we travel to mom and dads, Cole is deep in conversation with his sister Michelle.  He’s already spoken to his nephew’s Thomas and Caleb. I hear him say frustratedly, “Yes, I’m sorry you’ll have to deal with them on your own this year, but we did extend an offer for you to come visit us.”  He says some more ‘um’s and ok’s’ before hanging up.

I reach my right over to his left thigh and give it a gentle squeeze. “I’m sorry.” I say gently.

He retorts, “It’s not your fault.”  He then closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.  I let him be.  I just continue to squeeze his thigh. “I’m sorry Jake.  There was no need for me to take my family frustrations out on you.”  I squeeze his leg again.  He puts his left hand on top of my right one.  I can feel him tighten his fingers, needing the connection between us.  I release his leg and flip my hand over, so we are palm to palm.  I tighten my grip on his hand, letting him know I am here for him.  At the next stop light, I lean over and give him a kiss on his cheek. 

We make it to Aunt Mattie’s and Uncle Jack’s without further incident.  Cole puts on a great show, but I can tell his heart is not completely in it.  He watches Tiny and all my other younger cousins scramble about the yard hunting for the eggs he hid.  I stand right next to him with my right arm around his waist, holding him close to me. At one point he leans his head onto my shoulder and quietly says, “I’m so happy to be with you and your family Jake.”  My heart breaks.  I want to turn, scoop him up, and cradle him in a loving embrace, just to let him know I love him without end.

After the hunt is over and prizes are awarded, the buffet is served.  As always, the parents go first, then the youngest kids. After that, it’s free for all.  Cole holds my hand and makes sure we go last.  I don’t mind as there is always enough food.  We sit at one of the empty picnic tables and I try to make small talk.  We talk about work and working out.  I suggest that I join him on his next workout and I can review his progress and see if any changes are needed.  He smiles at that and nods.  From the corner of my eye, I see Tiny and Rose approaching.  If it were anyone else, I’d probably have waved them off, but Cole holds them both in high regard and they are always welcome.  Tiny sits next to me, as always, and Rose sits next to Cole.  I see her wrap her left arm around his waist and give him a side hug.  We continue to eat in silence until Tiny breaks it by saying, “Thank you for organizing the hunt, Cole.  We had a lot of fun and really liked the prizes.”  Cole nods to him with appreciation and a smile.  Tiny then mysteriously says, “Keep an eye on Monster.”  We all pause and look at Tiny, but he just keeps eating his pineapple stuffing.  I look at Rose who just shrugs her shoulders.

A few hours later, we are back in the condo, on the sofa, just relaxing.  Cole has his head in my lap and his feet extended over the side arm. I caress his scalp with one hand and rub his chest and abs with my other.  His eyes are lazily shut, but he is awake as the fingers on his left hand are keeping beat with the ‘Death Cab for Cutie’ song on the streaming device.

I quietly ask, “Any desire to hit the gym or throw some discs around?” I inwardly hope I get the terminology correct.  He slowly opens his eyes and smiles at me.

Next thing I know we’re on our way to the high school playing fields.  Cole wants to do some practice drills with me so I can get my timing and accuracy down.  He states plainly, “We both know you’ve got the power to throw the disc a long distance,” I flex my left bicep so he can see it.  He pats my forearm and says, “yeah, yeah, seen it before.”  We both laugh. “But I want you to practice your release point so it becomes consistent.  That’s one of the keys to getting better.  Also, I want to work on your approach throws.”  I turn to look at him.  I thought they were fine.  “The high arcing throws you like is nice, but not always needed.  Just like throwing at 100% is not needed with every throw.  You just need to read the situation and adjust.” I nod in understanding. 

We come to an intersection and are waiting for the light to change.  I look around and see a black Honda to our right.  I glance at the driver and see it is Luke.  I keep looking at him and calmly say to Cole, “Make a right here.”

Cole asks back, “Why? The school is just a few blocks down this street.” He’s extending his hand and pointing down the road.

I patiently say, “I understand, but Luke is sitting to our right and sees us.”  I continue to watch Luke as he stares at Cole’s burgundy Volvo. I advise him, “Don’t look. Just make the right and we can circle around once we know he isn’t following us.” 

Cole angerly says, “Just fucking wonderful.”

I playfully tease. “Um, Easter Sunday my friend, language.” He turns to me and puts up middle finger so only I can see it.  “You need to be careful with that, it may end up someplace you don’t want it.”

He comes right back and says, “Or maybe it ends up someplace I do want it.”  He wiggles it back and forth a few times.  I turn, lean to him, and give him a kiss, knowing Luke is watching.

Our light turns green and Cole make the right.  I instruct him on the new route to the school.  It takes us another 5 minutes, but once we determine we were not being followed, it is worth the extra time. 

We park in the back of the school, so the car is not in sight from the road and head to a field which is mostly hidden from the road.  Cole scouts out a couple soccer goals and has me stand on the backside.  He tosses a disc on the front side right on the goal line. He says, “The object is to get your disc to the front side within a few feet of the goal line and near the disc, which represents the basket.” I nod.  “You can do it anyway you want.” I nod again.  I study the situation and reach into the bag of discs.  I pull a few out.  I start to toss discs in the air and watch how they move.  Some bounce and roll away, some drop flat. After ten discs Cole stops me.  “Ok, what have you determined?”

I say dryly, “That you’re a cruel teacher.”

He smiles and says, “Ok. Besides that?”

“Not all discs are the same.”  He nods.  I hold up a Gray Shark approach disc. “This one seems to land flatter most of the time.”  He nods again.  

We continue the practice for the next hour.  He sets up different situations and has me throw discs to find the best shot.  If I get stumped, or don’t seem to grasp what to do, he takes the time to explain the shot and throws one or two to show me. Toward the end, I get the hang of it.  Some shots require a lot of finesse, while others are just flat out ‘throw the disc at the basket’.

As the orange sun starts to fade over the school, we gather the discs and head back to his Volvo.  “Thank you.” I say to him.  “This has been a huge help.”  I smile and grab his left hand in my right.  I gently squeeze.  He squeezes back and rubs his thumb over the back of my hairy hand.

We get back to the condo and get cleaned up.  I casually mention while we stand in the kitchen checking out dinner options, “You know, this is the second time I’ve missed a gym workout for you, 2^nd most perfect boyfriend.  Would you care to do an ‘in home’ workout?”  He raises an eyebrow and looks me over with a smile.  He then gives me the barest of nods. I smile back, clap my hands together, and cheerfully say, “Wonderful.”  I take the two steps to him, wrap my arms around his lower back and haul him in for a kiss.  Long and slow.  Wet and warm.  We take our time exploring each other.  Tongues move from mouth to mouth with neither of us pursuing a dominate position. He slips his hand behind my back and moves them to my lats.  I feel his hands latch on and pull us that much closer.  He slowly starts to grind his hips up and down, causing us both to become aroused. 

I start to pull his t-shirt up.  We separate for a second so I can pull it over his head.  I stare at his hairless muscled chest and tight abs.  I softly rub the back of my hand on his warm skin and feel the coiled muscles beneath it.  My hand slides up his chest to his right nipple.  He flexes his chest and I let out a sigh of pleasure.  Cole is definitely getting bigger.  His chest is now pushing over his abs a bit and his pecs have some heft to them.  I cup his pec and gently squeeze.  He flexes both of them and I can feel the muscle beneath.  I apply some pressure just so he gets to feel, what I feel, when he massages my chest.  He inches closer to me.  I gently grab the pert nub with my thumb and forefinger and twist it.  His body visibly shakes with pleasure.  He lets out a low moan and I feel his hand tighten on my t-shirt as he steadies himself.  I release his nipple and quickly shed my t-shirt.  Cole smiles and brings his left hand to my hirsute lower abs.  He rolls his fingers thru the course dark hair and coils some strands around his fingers.  He tugs ever so softly, massages each ab with his loving fingers, then moves on.  Upward his hand moves, over my abs to my lower chest.  He splays his hand out so his palm is flat against my muscled body.  He rubs his hand thru the dark hair and flexes his hand against my unflexed pecs.  I tighten them and he moans again as he feels the striations in the muscles.

I move my left hand back to his nipple and play with it again.  Cole shuts his eyes and lets the moment wash over him.  I can feel his fingers flex again grabbing some hair, as I continue to massage the areola. His fingers find my nipple and he is not as gentle as I am.  He knows how sensitive they are and how I like it when he man-handles them. As his fingers close on the right nipple, they start to pull and twist it.  I let out a groan which starts in my lower abdomen. I see him bite his lower cheek and close his eyes; his enjoyment is growing.

I feel my unit expand in my shorts and they suddenly feel very small.  I reach my right hand down and adjust myself so I have room to expand some more. I cop a feel of Cole’s engorged unit while I’m at it.  He moves both his to my ass, grabs both cheeks, and pulls my body to his and upward a bit.  His head rests on my shoulder and mine on his. Our units mash into each other thru our shorts.  I feel his hands go a bit lower, then tighten again.  As he pulls upward, he lifts me off the ground an inch or two.  His body bends backward a bit to support my weight. My mind goes left as he’s never done this, and I didn’t realize he could.  I kiss him furiously as he continues to hold me up. After a few seconds of heaven, he slowly leans back up and my feet hit the ground. 

I break the kiss, lean back a bit, and slyly say, “You’ve been holding back on me Colester, or should I start calling YOU, ‘Monster’?” 

We kiss again and when we part, he says, “Well, I just wanted to show you that I do listen to you when we train in the gym.”  I smile at him and wink. I caress his chest and then his blood engorged arms. He flexes them and smiles back. “I’ve been meaning to do that, but could never really find the right time.  I mean, you like to be the ‘big muscly guy’ who lifts me up and carries me around.”  I blush at his correct assessment of me being more dominant in the bedroom. “Well, I figured now was a good time as ever.”  I let out a roar of a laugh, put both my hands on the sides of his clean-shaven face, and haul him in for the deepest kiss we can do.  I feel his hands grab my biceps, out of instinct, to steady himself.  I flex them and can feel his fingers dig into the fibers of the muscle.  I feel him groan through our kiss and his warm breath pushes into my mouth. 

When we break the kiss, his hands move to the sides of my face and he gently pushes his fingers thru my trimmed beard, then over my ears, to my mophead of curly dark hair.  His fingers massage my scalp and he pulls us back into another deep kiss.  My underwear is soaking wet from all the pre-cum I’ve released. I reach my hands down, push my shorts and underwear to the floor, and uncage the monster.  My unit snaps back up to my abs, coating them with more pre-cum.  I fumble for Cole’s shorts and push them down as well.  My huge mitt of a hand encircles his iron hard hairless unit and gives it a soft tug.  I feel some of his liquid escape and coat my hand.  He moans, releases his hands from my head and they travel south, raking the hair on my chest, then abs, then find their way to my unit. I shiver at the sensation of his fingers rubbing against my muscles. Again, he is not soft and gentle like me.  One of his hands grabs my unit and starts to tug, while the other cups my balls.  He massages them, then extends his index finger and runs it under my balls, and softly rubs the lightly hair covered area.  I groan and anxiously say, “Cole, keep doing what you’re doing and there’s going to be a mess on your abs.” 

He immediately stops and pulls his hands off my body. He playfully says, “We can’t make a mess here in the kitchen.  Perhaps we should go…”  I move to him, crouch down, wrap my hand around his legs and scoop him up with ease.  He reaches his left arm around my neck for stability.  I take the ten steps to the bedroom and toss him onto the middle of the king size bed.  “I could have walked big guy…”

“I know, but this way I get to outdo you in the lifting category.”  I wink at him.

‘Well as long as your ego is placated…”  He grins at me.  I wink again and move to the edge of the bed.  I start to crawl onto it, staring into Cole’s blue eyes as they watch my approach.  His soften dick starts to harden.  Mine is swinging between my legs and rehardens as well. In the short time it takes me to cover his body with mine, we’re both rock hard again. 

His hands come to the sides of my face and he pulls me down for another kiss.  Our bodies merge and I lie on top of him, pushing his body into the dark blue comforter. He holds my head close, we swap spit, and I feel his tongue enter my mouth and lick my teeth.  He likes to do this and I find it erotic. 

I rub my body against his, break our kiss, lean up, grab his legs, and gently pull them up, exposing his hole.  My unit is covered in pre-cum, so I line it up with his hole and slowly push into him.  He sighs at the feeling.  Once I’m completely in, I release his legs, which fall to my shoulders.  Cole closes his eyes and I can tell they’ve rolled to the back of his head by the moans emanating from him. I start to pull out and stop once the mushroom head of my unit appears.  I slowly push back into him.  Another moan, but longer and deeper.  I push my body forward again, bending his legs back toward his head.  Cole is very flexible and enjoys this position.  His ass comes off the bed with new position.  I put my hands on the bed, by his chest.   He senses them, moves his hands to my biceps and grabs on. 

Once we’re both in position, I begin to increase my thrusting.  I push a bit harder each time and grunt as I bottom out.  He moans as my hairy balls slap against his pale white hairless ass.  Sweat begins to form in his forehead and chest.  His grip on my biceps becomes a bit harder.  I can feel his fingers tighten on my muscles.  I feel sweat on my body as well.  My curly hair begins to stick to my face and I can feel warm moisture coalesce in the hairs on my chest, then drop onto Cole’s chest as my body rocks forward and back.  

I lean down and kiss him.  His eyes snap open and he feverishly kisses me back. His fingers dig in again, and I feel my load build.  I hit the point of no return and furiously pound his ass.  I croak, ‘Cumming…” then my load explodes out of my and into his warm, welcoming ass.  He closes his eyes again and grunts with each shot, with a huge smile on his face. As I slow, he moves his left hand from my bicep to his unit and starts to quickly stroke it.  I untangle my arms from his, carefully pull out, and move my head down his body, lapping up our sweat as I go.  Once I’m at his abs, I move to the side and put my mouth right next to his dick.  He continues to stroke himself.  I move my mouth and swallow his unit, pushing his hand out of the way.  I bob my head up and down, taking him to the hilt each time.  I apply suction and move my right hand to his balls and taint.  I gently caress his balls and that’s all it takes.  He calls out my name, bucks his hips upward, and cum squirts into my mouth and down my throat.  I adjust my right hand and cup his ass and lift his body to my mouth, forcing more of him into me.  I pop a finger into his cum leaking hole and piston it in and out.  Cole struggles to free himself from my grasp, but I push my head onto his abs, pinning him down.  Cum continues to spew from him into my greedy mouth. He starts to slow after his fourth shot, but I suck as hard as I can to make sure I’ve drained my man as completely as I can.

Once he starts to soften, I release him carefully, setting his ass back on the bed and letting his unit slide out of my mouth, and back on to sweat abs. I crawl up the bed, lie next to him, and run my fingers over his still sweaty body.  I quietly say, “That was a nice workout.”

He responds just as quietly, “uh-huh.” I lean over and we kiss.  I turn over to my back and stare at the ceiling as it fades.

 

Luke’s point of view.

‘A fucking Volvo?’. My anger builds as I stare at Jake and his boyfriend to my left at the intersection.  ‘What the hell does he do to be able to afford a car like that?’ 

Jake sees me, I see him.  He turns to the boyfriend, says something and then they kiss.  ‘Of course, they kiss. They’re always kissing, and touching each other.’  Their light turns green and they make a right and drive past me.  I sit there for another minute.  My light turns green and I make a right.  I drive around for a while, just getting my mind off Jake and letting my anger at his boyfriend subside.  As I drive past the high school, I see movement in the back, on the playing fields.  I think to myself, ‘No, it couldn’t be them? Out here…now…on Easter Sunday?’  I go to the next intersection, make a u-turn and do a slow drive by the school. They’re far off and pretty well hidden by the school, but it’s them.  I can tell as I see discs getting tossed around. 

‘So, Jake lives somewhere close by.’  I drive up a few blocks, pull onto a side street, and park behind some vehicles.  Just another parked car on the street.  Of course, I have a view of the school and will be able to see them leave.  I pull out my phone and start to play some games to occupy my time.  I lose track of time, but see it has started to get dark.  ‘They have to be done soon.’  A few minutes later I see the Volvo drive past, from left to right.  I slowly pull out and let a couple cars pass when I get to the stop sign. I pull onto the main road and can see them 4 cars up.  I tail them back to town, with a nagging thought in the back of my head saying, ‘Stop it dumb ass. Just go home’.  I debate with myself for a few miles, when they pull into a condo community.  There’s no way I can follow them in there.  They’ll see my car in an instant.  ‘At least I have an idea where they live.’   I continue to drive around and then make my way home.

I meet Mark Monday afternoon for coffee, as usual. I ask, “How was your Easter?  Family doing ok?” 

He gives me a shrug, “Yeah, same old, same old.  We did have a nice piece of fresh lamb.  Mom broiled it and it came out perfectly.  That with some garlic mashed potatoes and fresh Asparagus, and I was set for the evening.”  I nod as my mouth begins to water.  “How ‘bout you?  You get to your brothers like you were planning?”

I shrug, “Eh, it was ok.  He drank too much. My sister-in-law bitched and moaned at him the whole time.  We had London broil, which actually wasn’t too bad.  I took off soon after that.  They were starting to get into it and I didn’t want to be in the middle, again.”  Mark nods in understanding.  My brother’s marriage has been on the rocks for the past few years and I seem to be there when a grenade goes off. “I did take the kids outside for a while, just so they didn’t have to listen to the theatrics. Dude, not sure which one is the bigger drama queen, Lou or Sheila.”  Mark laughs.  I chuckle too.

Mark mentions, “Supposed to be nice for a few days, want to throw a round or two?  I hear there’s a new course in Groton City.  We could get Parker and try it out.” I nod.

“Yeah, I heard about it on Facebook and checked out their site.  Not too bad from what I could see.  It’s built on some old farm land, but has a bunch of holes in the woods.  Even has water holes.”  Mark nods.

“Cool.  I’ll shoot him a text on the thread today.”  Mark pauses and looks at me kind of weirdly. “Um, how’s work?” He asks quietly. 

I groan knowing this would come up.  “It’s ok.  No suspension this time.  Just a warning to be on time.”  He smiles.  “I get where they’re coming from, but it’s not like I’m an hour late, or even half an hour late, it’s just a few minutes here and there.”  He cocks an eyebrow at me.  “Ok, fine, like 10 minutes, but I’m not prepping for brain surgery or anything.”  I say frustratingly.

He keeps his voice as even as he can, without sounding judgmental, “But Luke, you’ve been warned about being late.”  I shrug.  “I get the job is pretty laid back, but everyone has limits and you may be pushing theirs.  Why not just set your alarm for 15 minutes earlier?  You’d be there in plenty of time.” I sigh.  “Remember, you need this job after the fiasco you caused at the last one last year.”  I frown, remembering what a nightmare that was. 

I sheepishly agree and say, “Ok. But I make no promises.  I like living on the edge.”  He rolls his eyes at me.  “Oh, stop worrying and send the text to Martin.”  He laughs and pulls his phone out.

Thursday afternoon the three of us are pulling into the parking lot of the new course.  The drive over was not too bad.  There are just a few cars in the lot.  I pull my phone as we head to the putting area.  I get a map of the course up and pull up U-Disc so we can keep track of our scores. 

Parker sees me on my phone and asks to take a quick look at the map.  I hand him my phone then notice he is minimizing the map.  He goes into my gallery and starts to scroll.  I reach my hand out and angerly say, “Give me my phone back asshole.”

He turns away and says, “Nope. Gotta check something.”  I put my hand on his shoulder as he turns away.  He stops scrolling, turns back, and flatly says, “Who’s the asshole?" He turns to Mark and holds my phone up, showing that I still have photos of Jake on it.  Mark just shakes his head.

I try to snatch the phone back, but Parker moves quicker.  He points his finger at me and gives me a look to back off.  I take a step toward him and he makes a fist.  I stop, knowing he’d punch me without a second thought. He says with no emotion, “Since you’re not adult enough to remove the photos, I will.” He glances at me, then Mark, who only nods to him. I see him make some movements with his fingers, knowing he is deleting the pics and videos.  I sigh to myself, admitting he’s just looking out for me but not happy with it.

When he finishes, he hands it back to me and cheerfully says, “Shall we get started?” I give him the finger as he winks at me.

 

Jake’s point of view.

I roll over in bed on a lazy Saturday morning.  Cole is still asleep next to me.  His back is rising and falling at a slow and steady pace.  My man is still out cold.  I carefully slide out of bed and as quietly as possible walk to the bathroom.  I close the door and turn the light on.  I brush my teeth and take a piss.  I turn the light off and head back into the room.  I pull on some underwear and sweatpants and a not too smelly t-shirt and head to the kitchen.

I get a bowl of cereal and move to the living room to watch the local news to check the weather.  Going to be a cold one today.  Highs in the mid-50’s with a northwest wind.  I decide to hit the gym, then check on the estate.  The guests left a few days ago.  Nobody coming in until late next week, so no rush for Z and CK to get it straightened up, but no harm in them starting now.

I turn the TV off and put the bowl in the sink.  I head to the second bedroom and get changed in there, so I don’t wake Cole.  I pull on a pair of dark blue mesh shorts, a grey dry fit t-shirt, and my size 13 Asics.  I fill my gym bag with a change of clothes, a towel, and my toiletries.

I get to the gym pretty quickly due to the time. Gym is pretty empty.  I dump my stuff in a locker, get my earbuds and head up to the gym floor.  I open my phone, go the Pandora app, and select the Linkin Park station.  I head to a flat bench and toss on a pair of 45-lb weights. I do some quick warm-up exercises, but probably not enough.  I slide onto the bench and grip the bar at shoulder width, take a deep inhale, and push the bar off the rack as I exhale.  Another inhale as I lower the bar.  Brief pause as the bottom, then push up as I exhale.  They weight feels good.  I do a quick scan of my body and don’t feel anything out of place.  I whip out 10 warm-up reps.  I get up and add another 45 to each side.  Ten more reps, then add a 25 to each side.  Music is pumping, my body is warming up, and I see a few more regulars have joined me.  I nod to some that I know and they nod back.  Body is warming up, chest feels tight, but is loosening.

Back to the bench, swap the 25’s for 45’s.  5 reps, add 10’s to each side, and take a walk around the cardio machines for a quick break. As I sit on the bench the music pauses for a moment, then continues.  I know I just got a text, but figure it’s from Cole wishing me a good morning, so I ignore it.  I pump out 5 more reps, then pull the 10’s and put the 25’s back on.  Last set.  I take a sip of water and another few seconds of rest.  I look around the floor and find Sandy a few benches down.  I walk to him and ask him for a quick spot.  He nods and we walk back.  I lie on the bench, get my hands set, and see Sandy hover over the bar.  I grab it as he places his hands on it as well to help me with the lift-off. 

Once the bar is over my chest he slowly releases and leans backward, out of my view.  I drop the weight to my chest, then exhale as I shove the weight up.  I get 4 good reps in, then the bar seems a bit heavier.  My reps slow.  I push out another 3, then hold the bar up for an extra second or two.  As it drops to my chest, I see Sandy lean forward into my view. The bar rests on my chest for a second, then I exhale and push up at the same time.  The bar moves a lot slower.  It’s ¾’s up when it gets stuck.  Sandy’s hands come into view and slide under the bar.  I grunt angerly and he moves back.  I quickly inhale, then blow out thru my mouth with force.  As I do this, I push the bar and it goes up.  My arms straighten and I move the bar to the rack.  Sandy grabs it and I hear it clang into place. 

I lean up, fist bump Sandy, and he walks off.  I take a few deep breaths to calm myself then I grab my water bottle and phone and take another lap around the gym.  I check my message and see it was Cole saying good morning.  I respond with a smiley face.  Back at the bench, I unload the bar and move to the decline bench.  I go thru the same routine, but with a bit more weight on the earlier sets.  I find I can either push a bit more weight for fewer reps, or less weight for more reps.  I am going for the latter today.  I eventually get the bar up to three 45’s on each side and pump out 7 reps.  As I unload the weights, I can feel sweat forming on my forehead and back.  I twist my neck and feel it crack.  Some tension leaves my body.  I take a deep inhale and slowly let it out.

I move out to the free weight area and see most of the adjustable benches are taken.  I see one at the far end of the row.  I walk to it and toss my towel onto, claiming it.  I squat down and adjust the back to a 30-degree angle.  I search the weight rack and see the pair of 65 dumbbells are still free.  Before I grab them, I get a pair of 15 pounders set them behind the bench.  I walk back into the rack room and grab a 45-lb weight and carry it back to my bench.  I put it near the 15-lbers.  I then get the 65’s and sit on the bench.  As I lean back, I heft the weights up to shoulder level.  I turn them from being parallel with my shoulders to a 45-degree angle between my shoulder and chest. I find this helps concentrate on the pecs a bit more than the normal press.   It’s also a bit harder, hence why I lower the weight.

 I do ten regular reps, then get up and grab the 15’s.  I do ten lateral raises, put them down, and grab the 45’lb.  I move to the astroturf mat, get on my knees, and slide the weight onto my back.  I do 10 push-ups, then stand and do some core exercises with the weight, like twists and lifts with extended arms.

I take a quick walk around the cardio machines as my break, then back at it.  2^nd set.  For the presses, I keep my left are straightened and only press my right one up and down.  I do ten front raises, then the push-ups with the extra weight.  Quick break with a drink of water, then onto the 3^rd set.  Keep the right are straight and only press the left.  15 lateral raises, 10 more push-ups.  Break, then the final set.  Alternate raising left arm then right are, 10 reps each arm.  10 lateral raises, 10 front raises, then push-ups with the 45lbs to failure.  I get 17 push-ups then collapse on the floor. 

My body is burning and sweating at the same time.  I’m gasping for air and my looking around for my water bottle.  I roll over and stare at the ceiling tiles for a moment while catching my breath.  I lean up into a sitting position, then roll over to make it easier to stand back up.  Being 6’3” and 230lbs makes it a bit tougher to get up off the floor. I head back to my bench, grab my water and take a long drink.  My heart rate slows and I try to decide what to do next. 

I want to do cross cable flies, but the machine is taken.  I see a few weighted barbells are free.  I grab the 55lb one and start to do bicep curls while I wait for the cable machine.  I do a quick 15 reps, then move up to the 70lb bar.  Another 15 reps and I start to feel my bi’s burn.  The pump feels really nice.  I move to the heaviest bar the gym has, 90lbs.  I go to failure, which is 18 reps.  I struggle with the last three, but power thru them.  Sweat is pouring down my face.  My arms are filling out the sleeves and my chest feels tight in the sweat-soaked t-shirt.  I flex my pecs and get some stimulation from my hair rubbing against the t-shirt.  I quickly stop as I feel a boner start to form.  I see the cable fly machine is free and quickly move to it.  I get the correct handles and move into the center of the area. I set the weight to start at 40lbs. I reach my left hand to the right handle and pull it across my body.  I lean to get the left handle with my right hand.  Once I have both, I slowly stand up and relax my body, letting my arms falls across my body.  I inhale and as I exhale, I raise my arms and pull the cables across my body, putting strain on my chest, triceps, and shoulders. 

Once I’ve exhaled completely, my arms are straightened to my sides.  I can feel the weight across my body and loosen my knees a bit.  I inhale again and as I exhale, I let the weights pull my arms back across my chest as I resist.  I make it take about 5 seconds for the release movement.  The strain feels great.  All the ancillary muscles in my arms, chest, shoulders, and core and working overtime to keep my body steady.  Once my arms are crossed again, I take another deep breath and start again.  I get ten slow reps done, then ease the weights down, one side at a time.  Sweat is dripping off my head, thru my beard, and down into the soaked shirt.  I grab my towel and wipe my eyes dry then take a drink. 

I move the weight up to 50lbs and do my second set.  Same slow movement.  I really begin to feel my muscles twitch as fatigue starts to set in.  After the set, I take a lap and fill my bottle up. I come back for my last set and bump the weight up to 55lbs.  Last set, reps to failure.  I make it to 12 and hold my arms straight for as long as I can.  It seems like forever, but after checking the clock, it’s only 30 seconds.  I try to slowly release the weights, but my left hand is sweaty and the handle slips out.  The weight crashes down and the handle bangs into the machine. I start to blush.  I sheepishly look around and see some people staring at me.  I put my hand up and quietly say ‘sorry’.  Most of them nod and roll their eyes. 

I wander around for another half hour doing different exercises to hit the supporting chest and shoulder muscles.  After I’m done, I head back down to the locker room, strip, weight myself (about 232lbs), then hit the shower.  I turn the water to warm and step in while it gets up to temperature. 

I let the water soak my wavy dark hair and cascade down my perspiring muscular body, taking the sweat with it.  I grab the body wash, get a huge dollop in my hand and turn the water off.  I lather it up, then scrub my whole body, from bottom to top.  As I near my mid-section, I get more soap and finish up my chest, arms, and head.  I grab some more and get my face completely soapy.  I reach for the handle and turn the water back on.  I again let the water soak my head and spill over my whole body.  I scrub the soap out of every crevice and orifice on me.  Being so hairy, it takes a little extra time and patience to make sure my balls and crack are soap free. 

I like when Cole and I shower together.  We make sure the other is completely soap free before we get out.  This has led to some extended showers where Cole insists I have some soap left in my ass crack and the only way to get it out is to spread my cheeks as far apart as possible so he can scrub the area.  He, of course, runs his iron poker all around the area to get rid of the soap.  That of course that leads to a sticky mess which needs to be cleaned off.

I come out of my reminiscing and see I’ve sprouted a woody.  I turn the water from warm to cool and let it calm me down.  They’ll be plenty of time later today for me to get it back up. 

I get dried off, changed into a new pair of sweatpants and sweatshirt, and head out to my truck.  I start the drive home thinking of what Cole and I can do today. 

As I pull into the condo parking lot, I spot the car and think to myself, ‘Fuck’.

 

Luke’s point of view.

Saturday morning, why not drive around town and try to scout out where the man of my dream’s lives, maybe get a few new pictures of him to replace the ones that fucker Parker deleted.  

I drive past the local diner.  They have an awesome special called ‘The Monster’ that I’ve had way too many times.  The burger is just right, medium with American cheese, curly fries, and the vanilla milk shake with Oreo’s, chocolate sauce, and fudge.  I gain weight just thinking about it.  I pass the local musclehead gym, but don’t see his pickup.  Thought for sure he’d be there.  I drive around for another ten minutes then spot his truck at a hole in the wall gym.  ‘Really, that dump?’ I think to myself.  Thought for sure he’d be at the newer, more up to date one.   I drive back to the diner, get a coffee and a pastry and drive toward his condo development. 

I pull in and drive around slowly.  I look for his truck to see if he beat me back. I don’t see it, but I do see the dark red Volvo.  Boyfriend has it parked in a spot away from most other vehicles and at the end of the aisle to protect it.  So, the boyfriend is rich and not too dumb.  I find a spot a few rows away, but still with a view of it. 

I settle in and drink my coffee and nibble on the pastry.  I pull my phone out and have it ready to get some pictures when Jake comes back.  I flip through the Sci-fi magazine I have in the car to kill time.  I’m half way thru an article on the newest Marvel movie due out when I see Jake’s pickup drive past me. 

I drop the magazine and get my phone.  I watch him park and as he gets out, he doesn’t head toward the building.  He’s coming towards me.  I get excited, maybe he’s forgiven me.  I put the phone down and get out of the car.  When I shut the door, I turn with a smile on my face and he is 5 feet away.  He comes to a stop and stares at me with sad and frustrated eyes.  I think, ‘Uh-oh’. 

He flatly says, “Luke, what are you doing?” He stares at me.

I think, ‘Oh boy, he’s not as dumb as I thought he was.’  I stammer, “Um…just waiting for a friend…”  I cringe at the obvious lie. 

He lets out a heavy sigh and puts his enormous hands on his thick, but muscled hips.  “Really, dude?”  I shrug.  “Ok, since you can’t take hint, let me make it clear to you.”  He closes the distance between us.  When we’re face to face, he puts his hands on my lats and just lifts me up.  My body tingles with excitement as my feet leave the ground, but I know it shouldn’t. He walks me to my car, lifts me higher, and sets my on the roof of my Honda.  I’m a bit higher than he is and have to look down to him.  I feel a boner start to form and it feels nice.  “Now, you see how easy that was for me, right?” I nod, smiling to myself.  My boner stiffens and starts to tent my shorts.  “Ok, next time I see you tailing me or my boyfriend.”

I blink and stutter, “What do you mean?”

“Luke, please treat me with some respect.”  He puts his fists on either side of me and moves so his body is right against the car, pinning my legs to door and window. “We know you’ve been following us around town for a while, ever since Easter Sunday when we saw you at the intersection, then you proceeded to follow us home.”  He raises an eyebrow.

I crack a sad smile, “Ok, guilty.”  Maybe being honest will help.  “Jake, I like you.”  His face tenses. “I’ve liked you since I saw you that first day on the course.  I think we’d make a great disc golf team.”  I carefully wave my right hand at his body and say, “With your muscles and strength and my knowledge of the game, we could tear it up at the local tournaments.” 

He takes a step back, looks into the car and spots the bag with my discs.  He opens the door, pulls the bag out and rifles thru the bag. He pulls out a few discs.  He holds them up between us and casually asks, “Are these your favorite drivers?”  He has my Innova Leopard, the green Destroyer that Parker got for me, and my red Innova DX Thunderbird. I smile and nod yes.  “Great!”  He says happily.  He proceeds to stack them together, looks at me, holds them up, barely flexes his arms, and snaps them all in half like they were dry wood.  I gasp and open my mouth to yell at him, but he shushes me with a look.  He then puts the six pieces in a stack, looks at me again and winks as he flexes to show off his biceps and forearms as he snaps them in half again. 

He angerly says, “Do I have your attention now?”

I am angry and excited at the same time.  That’s a lot of money he just destroyed without a care.  He holds them out, moves to me, and pushes the stack of them against my chest.  He pushes me back a bit and I have to put my hands on the roof to keep from falling backward.  He gets really close and I can see the anger in his green eyes.  He quietly says, “You will leave me and my boyfriend alone.  Am I clear?”  I am dumbstruck. “No more texts, no more following us, no more casually turning up at the course when we do, right?”  I nod in agreement.  He orders me, “Phone.”  He puts his hand out, waiting for it.  I shift my eyes downward to the car below me.  He gets the hint and looks in the driver’s side window.  He spots the phone. He orders me, “Get down.”  I slide off the roof and stand out of the way.  He opens the door, grabs my phone, and hands it to me. 

“Open it.”  It’s not a request, it’s an order.  He’s crowding my space; I can smell his bodywash and deodorant. I can see his dark chest hair poking out of the top of his sweat shirt.  I fumble with my phone but finally open it as my erection grows. He takes it back, and does just what Parker did.  He goes to the photo folder and starts to look thru it for pictures.

“You’re too late.”  He glances up at me.  “Parker erased them a few days ago.”  He smiles slightly, but keeps looking. 

“I see he left all the ones of the other guys you’ve been trolling.  I have to say, I know most of these guys and if they knew you had pictures of them, they wouldn’t be half as nice as I’ve been to you.”  I cringe again.  “Some free advice Lukey Luke, get rid of them.”  His face goes back to sad as he hands the phone back to me.  “I get it, you like guys with muscles.   You’re not the first guy to admire me or any of the other guys you have pictures of, but stop stalking them and me.” 

My brain is spinning.  I’m still excited and I’m sure he can see my erection, but he hasn’t said anything about it.  I hear his advice, but am confused as to what to do.  I glance back at him and he is finishing up his lecture, “…will get you arrested.”

I sigh, knowing I need to end my obsession. “Ok.” He nods. I take a bold chance and ask, “Would you flex your bicep for me?” He just stares at me.  “I know.” I say sheepishly, “But I’ve always fantasized about feeling a bicep as big as yours.”  He just shakes his head no. 

“Luke, haven’t you heard a word I’ve said?”  He glances at my erection.  “I’ve watched your erection grow from the moment you got out of your car.  Do you really think I’m going to indulge your fantasy?”   I start to fade at his rejection. He looks me in the eyes and says with finality, “You need to leave.”  He stands back a few feet and waits for me to get into my car.

 

Jake’s point of view.

He leaves.  I think he was going to cry due to my rejecting his request. I stand there and make sure he leaves.  His car fades into the distance and I slowly turn and walk to the building.  Now to tell Cole.  This should be fun.  I trudge up the steps, my day having taken a downward spiral in a matter of minutes.  I get to our door, put the key in, and open it.  Cole looks up from the mess of papers spread out on the kitchen table and sees my face.   A concerned look comes over him.  He gets up and walks to me without a word and hugs me fiercely.  I hug him back. 

He whispers, “You ok?”

I whisper back, “Luke was here.”  He pulls back and stares into my eyes.  Now he’s concerned. “He was in the parking lot, waiting for me.” We move to the living room and sit on the sofa.  He puts his hand on my thigh and I explain what happened. He doesn’t interrupt.  But his hand tightens at some points and I can tell he’s getting angry and upset.

When I’m done, he says, “We need to call the cops.”  There is no emotion in his voice.  I look at him and he’s serious and doesn’t want to be argued with.  I nod and reach into my pocket for my phone. 

Two hours later, they’ve left.  We gave our statements and they took everything down.  They indicated they could issue a restraining order saying Luke cannot be within 100 yards of us. We talked it over and agreed to it.  They said they would get it filed and hand deliver it to Luke in the next day or two and would let us know when it was served.

Three days later we get the call that Luke has been served the restraining order.  I ask how it went.  The cops say, “It went as they typically do.  He denied being obsessed with you and that it was all a big mis-understanding.  We point out all the facts you supplied and he got embarrassed and accepted the paperwork.  We asked if he had any questions and explained the consequences if he broke the order.  He said he understood.”

The next morning, I drive to the estate and explain the situation to Zander and CK and ask them to be careful.  I describe Luke’s car and indicate they may want to check the entrance area as they come and go to make sure no one is standing around trying to get onto the grounds.  I then drive to my parents and explain what happened.  Tiny is still at school, so I could be honest when they peppered me with questions, especially since Luke had been following me around.  I don’t know if he knows where they live, or about Tiny and Rose and Jen. 

I spend the rest of the day at the estate, driving one of the UTV’s around, checking the perimeter, to make sure the fence has not been breached or damaged.  Everything looks good.  I do notice some trees in one of the lower meadows need to be thinned out.  I take some notes and pictures.

I go to the pond and sit in the waning sunlight, watching evening creep over the horizon to my right. It’s a cloudless day and the fading yellow, orange, and red sky soothe my thoughts.  As evening overtakes afternoon, stars start to make their appearance.  I close my eyes for what seems like a moment, but when I open them, it’s dark and Cole is next to me, his left hand on my right thigh, caressing it. 

No words are spoken.  He just knows what I need and is there for me.  I put my right arm behind his head and let it rest on his right shoulder.  He leans his head to me.  We sit. Frogs croak, crickets chirp, and lightening bugs flash all around us. 

More time passes.  I feel Cole start to stand.  He reaches his right hand to me and pulls me up.  We walk back to the caretaker’s house.  CK and Z are just finishing dinner.  We sit and talk for a bit.  I can tell they are avoiding the ‘Luke issue’, which is fine with me.  The less I need to talk about it the better.

As I drive back to the condo, my thoughts fall to Tiny, Rose, and Jen.  What if Luke knows where my parents live, or where the girls are?  Is he a danger to them, to get back at me?  What would I do if he tried to do something to them?  My thoughts turn dark.  Would I hurt him or let the police handle it?  What if he came after Cole, the man I love?  I decide to call the police again in the morning to see what, if any danger my loved ones may be in, because of the restraining order.  How far does it extend, people wise?  Just Cole and I, or my family as well?  Can I get them included, especially Tiny.  Last thing I need is to hear Luke showed up at one of Tiny’s pee-wee football games, or was spotted outside his school. 

I come to a red light and realize my knuckles are white from holding the steering wheel tightly.  I release the wheel and flex my fingers a few times.  The blood flows back into them. I take a few deep breathes.  My anger passes.  I pull into the condo parking lot behind Cole and park next to him.  As we get out, he walks to me and puts his hand in mine. He leans in and gives me a kiss.  His soft lips on my furry cheek feel relaxing. 

The next morning, I wake to find Cole watching me.  He smiles at me and gives me a kiss.  He pats my chest and asks, “Better?”  I shrug my shoulders.  He smiles again, props himself on his left elbow, and says, “It will get better, Jake.  It’s still fresh in your mind.”  I cock an eyebrow at him.  “No, I don’t think we should let our guard down, but we shouldn’t put our lives on hold because of it either.”  I nod in agreement.

To that end, I spend the day talking to the police to make sure the restraining order extends to my family and to Z.  They are hesitant, but when I explain how young Tiny is, they understand.  I spend most of the day at the estate, clearing out the trees in the lower meadow. I then hit the gym for a brutal leg workout, knowing I’ll feel it in a day or two.  I grab a quick shower and head home.  Cole is waiting for me with dinner and a guest.  I open the front door and hear Tiny’s bare feet racing down the hallway from the spare bedroom.  I turn and see him leap in the air at me.  I reach out and catch him and pull him close.  He’s laughing and his mop head of curly brown hair is a mess. I happily say, “Well, well little man, what are you doing here, and on a school night?”  I hold him at arm’s length and look into his deep green eyes.  His smile is infectious.  I grin back at him, then pull him back in for another hug.  My baby brother, now I know, there is nothing I wouldn’t do if he was put in harm’s way.

He starts to giggle and says, “Cole said you were missing me.  Mom and dad said it was ok if I came over for dinner and spent the night.” 

I raise an eyebrow at him.  “Don’t you have school tomorrow?”

He rolls his eyes at me as only a kid can do.  He impatiently says, “Yes, Monster, I have school, but Cole said you will drop me off.”  I look past Tiny at Cole, who only winks at me with a smile.  I wink back. 

I put Tiny down, walk to Cole and give him a kiss.  I whisper, “Thank you.” And give him a tight hug.  I turn back to Tiny, pick him up and put him on my shoulders as I walk to my bedroom.  I ask him, “So, what are we going to do tonight for this guy’s night in?  Nothing too crazy I hope?”

He says disappointingly, “Well, I can’t stay up too late.” I lift him off my shoulders and toss him carefully to the middle of the bed.  He lands on the comforter and bounces once or twice, laughing the whole time.  He continues, “But, Cole did say we could play some card games.”  I nod in agreement.  I quickly get changed into a pair of sweatpants and long sleeve t-shirt. 

When I’m done, I reach out, grab Tiny, and carry him like a football back to the kitchen.   Cole has dinner on the table and I see it’s Tiny’s favorite, cheese burgers and mac and cheese.  Tiny sits right next to me and talks non-stop about his pee-wee football practice, the books he is reading, and what he wants for his birthday in a few weeks.  I take in everything he says and glance at Cole who is smiling at me and loving every minute. 

After we finish, Cole insists on cleaning up.  Tiny and I head into the living room and I pull a couple decks of cards.  Cole joins us.  We play a few rounds of crazy eights, then war, then blackjack.  Tiny is basically a card shark and reads people like no one else I know.  Bluffing against him is nearly impossible.  He stares at you, then out of the blue makes his call, seemingly knowing what you are holding.

After a few hours, I check the clock and see it is just passed Tiny’s bedtime.  I call last hand.  Tiny whines to me that it’s still early, but I hold firm.  We play a hand of blackjack and Tiny is the dealer.  I watch him carefully shuffle the cards, then deal to Cole and I.  Cole has an Ace showing, I have a 5.  Tiny checks the dealer’s down card.  He has the Ace of hearts showing.  A devilish grin comes over his face.  I cannot tell if he’s bluffing or not.  He calms down, looks at us both and says, “Would anyone like insurance?”  ‘Where does he learn this stuff’, I think to myself.  Cole immediately says yes and adds a few chips to his pile.  I stare at Tiny, who now only has a smirk.  I decline.  He shrugs his shoulders at me and proceeds to flip over his down card, showing the 10 of clubs.

He reaches out and pull my chips away.  He reaches for Cole’s, but he says, “Hold on a minute little man.”  He calmly turns over his down card, showing the Jack of diamonds.  I smile and Tiny frowns.  Cole says, “You owe me some money.” 

We put everything away and Tiny goes to the spare bedroom and gets changed.  He comes back out, gives us both a hug and I walk him back to his room.  He gets in bed and I remind him, he cannot come into my room tonight.  He nods with understanding.  I turn off the light and close the door.   I walk back to the living room and see Cole on the couch with a glass of water for both of us.  I plop down next to him and quietly say, “Thank you.”  I lean over and give him another kiss. We sit and talk for another half an hour. 

As we get ready for bed, Cole hands me a pair of gym shorts.  I look at him quizzically. He nods to Tiny’s room.  I say, “He knows not to come in here.” 

Cole jokingly says, “Yeah, want to place a bet on that?” He holds the shorts up again.  I mull it over for about a second, then take the shorts and slip them on. 

Sure enough, the next morning, as our alarm goes off, I feel a small body next to me.  I carefully roll over and see Tiny is between Cole and I, arms and legs spread out.  Cole is just staring at me with his ‘I told you so’ grin.  I roll my eyes and stick my tongue out at him.

We get Tiny ready for school and I drive him as it is on my way to the estate.  He’s strapped in and chattering away about last night and how much fun it was.  He says he wants to do it again.  I’m half listening and half watching traffic.  As we near his school, I slow the pickup down to a crawl due to all the kids wandering around.  Most are paying attention, but some have ear buds in or are staring at their phones.  I pull into the parent drop off area and come to a stop.  I put the pickup in park and get out. I go the Tiny’s side and open the door.  I make sure he has his bookbag, lunch bag, and jacket.  I keep his overnight bag and will return it later in the week.  Tiny gives me a big hug and I hug him back.  I watch him enter the school.  He turns and gives me one final wave.

I get to the estate and start to run some reports but find my mind keeps wandering.  Something is itching the back of my brain.  I run thru last night, but everything was ok.  Tiny behaved well and had fun.  Cole and I got some sleep.  We’ll make up for lost time tonight. Went to the gym, will feel it tomorrow for sure. This morning, Tiny got a quick shower, brushed his teeth, helped with breakfast, and had enough money for lunch.  Dropped him off and watched him go into the building.  Didn’t hit any kids or adults on my way in or out.  Called mom and let her know everything went well.  Eh, I’ll think of it.

CK wanders in and we talk about some maintenance on the upper paths.  Some pine trees have become over grown and should either be trimmer or removed. I pull up an aerial shot of the estate on the computer and we check the area out.  The picture may not be up to date, but it gives us a good idea of what we’re looking for.

We get into the 2020 black Honda Renegade UTV and CK drives us up past the house to the upper path.  As we get to the ridgeline, we slow, and start to look for the trees.  I pull out the map I printed and point out the area.  We come to a stop and go down the hill a bit to the specific area.  I can see the trees are too dense and will prohibit growth.  I reach into my pocket for tape to mark the trees, but realize I left it in the UTV.  I get back and see my phone on the seat with a blinking message light.  I grab the tape and phone and start to head back. 

I open my phone and see two missed calls from mom and a text from dad. I think, ‘Must be important.’ I quick dial mom and she picks up before my phone even rings.  “Hey mom, I see you ca…”

She cuts me off and in a frantic voice asks, “Jake, you dropped Tim off at school, right?”

I begin to worry and stop dead in my tracks on the hillside.  I look into the trees, remembering back to the drop-off. I calmly say, “Yes, I dropped him off at the normal spot and watched him go into the school. He waved to me right before he went in.”  I feel my heart begin to race.  “Mom, what’s happened.” I turn around and start back up the hill. 

I hear CK call to me, “Monster, where’s the tape?”  His voice fades as I move quickly to the top.

I put my hand over the phone and shout to him, “Get up here now.  Tiny is missing from school.” I get into the UTV and start it up. 

Mom is still talking to me. “..to homeroom, and never made it to his first class.  Your father is on his way over now.  The school has called the police.”

CK emerges from the tree line and sees me.  I frantically wave to him to get in.  He runs and jumps into the passenger seat. I give him my phone and say “It’s mom.  She’ll fill you in.”  I turn us around and speed us back down the path. We get back to the caretaker’s house and jump into my pickup.  I race down the driveway and click the gate opener so we don’t have to slow down.

CK is talking to me, but I barely hear him, “..such a thing to Tiny?”  He turns and I see him looking at me from the corner of my eye.  “You think it’s that guy, don’t you.”

The itch in my brain comes back, then I realize what was bothering me.  I quietly say, “Oh fuck.”  He stares at me.  “After dropping Tiny off, I was pulling out of the parking lot and out of the corner of my eye, I saw a dark 4 door sedan.  I thought the driver was still in it.” My hands begin to shake on the steering wheel.  “It was Luke in a janitor’s uniform.  The dude works at Tiny’s school.”  I press harder on the gas pedal, blowing thru a stop sign. “If he saw me, he saw Tiny.”

CK immediately picks up his phone and makes a call.  “Dad. Yeah, CK.  Jake says the guy he put a restraining order out on works at Tiny’s school and he probably took him.  He thinks the dude may have seen Jake drop him off.”  He’s silent as dad talks to him.  “Ok.  Uh-huh. Ok.  Yeah, a dark sedan, right Jake?” 

“It’s a black Honda.  Not sure of the model, could be an older Civic.  Pretty beat up.”  My heart is racing.

“Got that? Ok…Ok…We’re on our way.  Five minutes from the school, maybe less.”  CK puts his left hand on my right forearm.  He speaks calmly and softly, “Jake, slow down. We’ll be there in a few minutes.  No need to get into an accident.”  My heart is still racing.  Sweat has formed on my forehead.  “Tim will be ok.  He’s a lot smarter than we think.”  His grip tightens.  “Jake.”  I ease my foot off the accelerator. His grip relaxes.

We pull into the school parking lot.  I see half a dozen cop cars and police milling around.  Dad is with two cops, deep in conversation.  We park and hustle over to them.  One of the cops is a guy from the gym.  I recognize him right away and approach him.  I put my hand out and say, “Hey Jeremy.”

He looks up at me and in a shocked voice says, “Oh, hey Mons…er, Jake.” And shakes my hand.

I ask to anyone listening, “What do we know?  Has Luke taken Tim?  Is he still in the school?”  A hundred other questions flood into my brain, but I cannot think of which one to ask first. I’m taking deep breaths to try to stay calm, but it doesn’t seem to be working. 

Jeremy calmly says, “We are questioning Mr. Samuels right now.  It does not appear that he has Tim.”  A wave of relief washes over me and my heartrate slows just a bit. “We’ve checked his car and the trunk, but they’re empty.  Right now, the school is on lock-down and officers are searching room by room.”

My panic amps up again.  Where could Tiny be?  Could have taken him and handed him off to someone waiting outside, Mark or Parker?  They didn’t seem to be the kidnapping type, but who am I to judge.  I bring this up and Jeremy makes a note of it.  He calls someone on a walkie-talkie and walks away from us for some privacy. 

Dad puts his hand on my forearm and gently asks, “You’re sure you saw Tiny go in?”

My brain swirls.  I want to shout ‘Yes, of course I fucking did.’, but quickly see the panicked look on his face and mentally take a step back.  I calmly say, “Yeah.”  My shaking hand points to the ground and I say, “I dropped him off, literally, right here.”  I point to the front doors, “and he walked up the steps, into the building, and turned to the left.  He waved to me right before he moved out of sight.”

Jeremy walks back over and asks, “Does Tim have a cell phone?  We could try to ping it to locate him.”

Dad responds. “No, we thought he was too young to have one.”  Jeremy nods and makes more notes. 

Minutes pass like hours.  CK calls the other siblings and lets them know what’s up.  I hear my phone ping and see Cole has sent me a message.  I walk away and call him. He picks up on the first ring and says, “I’m in my car and on my way over.  I’ll be there in a few minutes.  I know you’re not ok…but are you ok?” 

I catch his drift.  I take another deep breath and quietly fill him in, “They have Luke and are questioning him.  He says he doesn’t have Tiny.”

“Well, that’s good.”

“Yeah.” I say skeptically.  “They’re searching the school right now.”

“You don’t think he took him and hid him, do you?”

I feel tears well up in my eyes, “God, I hope not.  If he did, he’s a dead man.”  That last part comes out as a forceful whisper.

“Jake, take a breath. Calm down.  They will find Tiny and everything will be okay.”  I take another breath.  “Please do not say anything like that in front of the cops.” 

I realize he is right.  “I’m sorry Cole, you’re right, I’m just scared.”

“Understand.  I’m parking now.  Will be there in 2 minutes.” 

We disconnect and I turn around looking for him.  I see him emerge from behind the school.  He’s walking briskly toward us.  I move to meet him.  He gives me a tight hug and I feel my emotions boil over.  Tears start streaming down my face and my nose starts running.  He kisses my cheek and says, “It’ll be ok.  Tiny will be found and will be ok.”  He hugs me closer.  I squeeze him back.

I blubber, “But…..”

He emphatically says, “No buts!  He is ok.  He just needs to be found.”  We continue to hug.  His hands are massaging my back.

We hear a commotion behind us.  We break apart and turn to see what’s up.  The cops are leading Luke down the steps toward their cars.  My anger builds and I start to walk toward him.  I feel Cole grab my arm to stop me, but I become an unstoppable, pulling him along with me as I walk.  When I’m close enough, I yell at Luke, “What did you do Luke? Where’s my brother?”  The cops immediately move to protect Luke.  Jeremy, CK, and Cole move to encircle me.  The three of them grab my body and plant their feet.  I come to a stand-still, but only because I know if I did anything to Luke, I’d be the one in trouble. 

Luke angerly yells back at me, “I don’t know anything about your brother, fucker.” 

I point at him and yell, “I saw you in your car this morning, in the parking lot.”  I wave my hand towards the lot.  “I know you saw me.  You still following me around?” 

He turns red and shouts, “How the fuck would I know you’ve got a kid brother, and that he goes to this school?”  He waves his arms at the school.

“I dunno, but you seem to have a way of finding stuff out about me.”  I point at him and raise an eyebrow.

He turns away and lets the cops lead him to their car. “Done with you Jake. You’re not worth the trouble.” I continue to stare at him.

Cole pulls on my arm and says, “Jake, let him go.  Let the cops do their thing.”

I ease up and can feel them release my body.  Cole moves in front of me and puts his arms over my shoulders.  He moves in for a kiss, and blocks my view of Luke.  He successfully distracts me.  His warm lips and smooth face against my course beard.  I feel his hands on my head, keeping it focused on him. I calm down. My heartrate eases. 

After the cops drive off with Luke, we walk toward the school and go in.  We’re led to an empty classroom.  Everything is so small.  I look at the desks and chairs, the mats on the floor, and blackboard.  God, was I this small at one point? I feel Cole’s hand rubbing circles on my back. 

I lean against a wall.  Cole is right next to me, his left arm around the small of my back, hugging me.  CK and dad are talking to the cops. I start to think.  If Luke didn’t know about Tiny, how would Tiny know about him.  We never told him about Luke or to be on the lookout for him.  I stare off into space wondering.  My heartrate slows. 

A few minutes later the cop’s walkie crackles.  My head snaps up to him.  He pulls it out and responds.  The voice on the other end says, “Got him.  He’s ok.”  Tears stream down my face in relief.  Cole hugs me.  I then walk to my dad and CK and we hug.  We break and I lean against the teacher’s desk trying to compose myself.  Dad calls mom and I can hear her cry with joy.  I text Rose and Jen.  CK texts Steve.  I see Cole sending a message to Z.  He comes back over to me and quietly asks, “You ok?”  I give him a huge smile and nod yes.

We make idle small talk until we hear Tiny and the cop coming down the hallway.  They enter the room and Tiny makes a B-line for dad.  Dad kneels down and draw him into a tight hug.  There are tears in his eyes.  He’s whispering something to Tiny.  They break the hug. Tiny looks into dad’s eyes and nods.

Tiny turns and walks to CK and gives him a hug, then to Cole, then to me.  I kneel down and when he’s in my arms, I hug him as tightly as I can, without crushing him.  But apparently it is too tight as Tiny chokes out, “Monster, I’m fine. You’re crushing me.”  I immediately release him.  He backs up, looks me in the eyes, and gives me a smile and a wink.

Tiny moves to a chair and sits down.  The cops ask him why he hid in the gym locker room. Tiny looks at the cop and says, “I saw Mr. Samuels, the janitor, and he didn’t look right.  He looked at all the kids a bit weirdly.”  He goes quiet for a second, then says, “Like he wanted to hurt someone and was searching for them.  He saw me and did a double take, like I reminded him of someone.”  He looks at me and says, “I think he thought I was you.”  I get worried.  “But he walked on by me.”  I slowly release the breath I did not know I was holding.  “I was heading to the art room and saw him again.  I got scared and ran to the gym. I saw him in the hallway, walking toward me, so I hid in a locker.”  I cannot imagine the terror Tiny was going thru because of me.  I feel Cole’s hand on my thigh, squeezing it.  “I just stayed there.”  He takes a breath and continues, “I heard the lockdown alarm, but did not want to leave because I did not know if he was still around.”

My brain swirls with anxiety.  I think, ‘All my fault. All my fault. I had to get mixed up with a whack-job.  Should have followed my instincts that first day when I met Luke and said ‘no’ to their invite.’

“…back to the house.” I come out of my thoughts and see dad standing in front of me with Tiny corralled to his side.

I sheepishly say, “I’m sorry, can you say that again?”

Dad smiles, puts his hand on my forearm and says quietly, “I’m going to take Tim back the house.  I think he’s had enough excitement for the day.”   

I think to myself, ‘He ain’t the only one.’, but say out loud, “Ok. If you need me for anything, just call.”

There’s another round of hugs and they take off.  CK gets the keys to the pickup and heads out.  It’s just Cole and I in the room.  We lean against the teacher’s desk.  He puts his right hand into my left hand.  I gently squeeze.  He squeezes back.  We’re silent for a few minutes.  I’m staring into space when he says, “I’m sorry.” 

I turn to him and we face each other.  His pale face is flushed.  His eyes are swollen from holding in tears of first anguish and then relief.  He puts his soft hand against my rough beard and quietly says, “This is my fault.” His eyes look around the room. “I’m the one who insisted you go play disc golf.  If it weren’t for me, this would have never happened.”  He starts to get choked up and a few tears come out of his eyes and slide down his face.

I reach my index finger up, wipe the tears away and whisper, “No, Cole. This is my fault.  I’m the one who brought Luke into our lives.”  I move my free hand between us.  He sighs and wants to argue, but I pull him in for a soft kiss.  Just a peck, but enough to calm us both down. We release and he moves in for a hug and puts his head on my shoulder.  I wrap my arms around him and hug him fiercely. He’s my boyfriend, he’s part of my life.  Just like Tiny, I’d do anything to protect him, as I’m sure he’d do for me.

After another minute, we break.  He looks me the eyes, runs his right hand thru my wavy dark hair and says, “Want to blow this popsicle stand?”  He gives me a smile and a wink.

Back at the condo, we’re on the couch relaxing, Cole to my right, but his body is leaning against mine, my right behind his head, gently massaging his crew cut scalp.  He hums as my fingers work their magic. His left hand is on my right thigh, alternatively squeezing and relaxing.

Time passes and I awaken to find Cole is not next to me, but the dark blue blanket we keep on the couch is over me.  I call out, “Cole?”

I hear him behind me answer, “Here, Jake.” I turn and see him in the kitchen getting a snack.  He walks back and says, “You went out pretty quickly.  I didn’t want to wake you.  I slipped out and put the blanket over you.”  I let out a yawn, just from him saying I looked tired.  He puts his right hand softly on my cheek and asks, “How do you feel?  Still tired or anxious?”  I think about it for a few seconds, then shake my head ‘no’. He smiles to me. 

He reaches his hand out and I take it.  I rise from the sofa, the blanket falling to the floor, and we walk back to our bedroom.  I close the door and turn to Cole who is waiting for me.   We come together.  My hands cupping his firm ass-cheeks and his draped over my shoulders.  We kiss.  Long and slow and softly.  His warm moist lips against mine. His clean-shaven face rubs against my beard.  I feel his hands in my hair. I squeeze his cheeks firmly and pull him towards me.  I feel his unit expanding and trying to move north.  Mine is firm, but still pointing south, trapped by his legs and thighs. 

Our kissing continues. I close my eyes and let him take charge.  He immediately senses that I have given him control.  His kisses become more intense and firmer.  He pushes his tongue into my mouth and we swap warm spit.  His hands cup the back of my head and pull us closer.  I do the same with his ass.  Now, both our units are rising to the occasion, but are stuck due to our clothes and our bodies being crushed together. My brain starts to swim so I release his body and gently push him away.  Once our bodies separate, my unit swings northward and drags the loose gym shorts up with it.  Cole’s does the same.  He looks at me with a cocked eye.  I whisper, “Just got a bit too hot, too fast.”  He winks, takes a second to strip out of clothes, then patiently waits for me to get naked. As my shorts hit the floor, he’s back at me, kissing me passionately.

His hands wander over my hirsute chest and sides, caressing my skin and hair.  My head tilts upward and I hum softly as his ministrations continue. My unit snaps against my abs and I feel some pre-cum escape me.  He turns his hands over and the smooth side of his fingernails run over my nipples and abs.  I moan at the pleasure.

He moves his hands to my nipples, grabbing both between his thumbs and forefingers.  He starts with gentle twists, then gets more aggressive. He pulls and twists, then just twists, like he’s trying to unscrew a couple of bottles. I stifle a groan. He pulls upward and I raise myself onto my tip-toes to try to alleviate some of the pain.  I bite my lower lip and squeeze my eyes shut.  I put my hands on his muscular shoulders to balance myself.  He takes my added weight in stride and continues to ravage my nipples.  After a few minutes, he slows and I come down and plant my feet on the floor.  I open my eyes to see his mischievous smiles.  He winks and tugs my nipples to pull my body toward his.  When we’re chest to chest, he releases my nips and quickly swings his arms under my lats to corral my body to his. 

We start kissing again.  He is more aggressive and slides his sweat-soaked hairless body up and down my equally sweaty hairy one.  He groans with excited pleasure as my hairy chest and abs rub against him.  He buries his face in my meaty pecs and uses his arms to compress my chest and squeeze his face. I comply and tighten my chest into solid granite.  I feel his tongue lap up some sweat from the valley between my mounds.  The rough texture of his tongue, then his supple lips on my skin ramp me up.

I moan, he moans, then he taps me on the back and I release him.  He looks up to me with his flushed face and a huge smile.  He puts his hands on my cheeks and pulls me to him and softly kisses me.  He holds on and takes the two steps backward to the bed.  He sits down and pulls my body on top of his as he falls backward.  I make sure not to crush him as we fall onto the comforter. 

He scoots backward toward the middle of the king-sized bed. I crawl after him with an animalistic smile on my face, knowing he is letting me take over.  He smiles back at me and flexes his still rock-hard unit.  It bangs his smooth cobblestone abs and I see a thin string of pre-cum tenuously stretch between his abs and his piss slit.  I lick my lips in anticipation and the sticky prize.  

As I crawl up the bed, my hands to the sides of his taut body. I lick his slick body, getting a taste of his salty sweat from his legs, to his hips, and finally his abs.  I stop there, dip my head to his unit and lap at the veiny log. I take his mushroom head into my warm mouth and coat it with saliva. I then bob my head up and down his impressive 8-inch length.

From my peripheral vision, I see Cole’s hands grip the comforter as his enjoyment increases. I close my lips around his thick unit and create a tight seal.  I begin to suck him like a purple Dyson vacuum.  I swallow his pre-cum as it leaks from him.  I maneuver my tongue to spread spit around the crown of his cap, arousing the sensitive nerves. He squirms, but I move my hands to his hips and hold his body in place.  He tries to back away, but I let loose a low growl from my gut and he giggles at the menacing, but otherwise meaningless sound.  I tighten my grip on his body and lift his hips off the bed, forcing more of his unit into my mouth and down my throat.  I gag momentarily, but his super-slick unit slides past my uvula and down the hatch.

I continue to bang him, my forehead colliding with his abs.  I think he likes it by his groans and the firm hold he has on my head.

I feel his hands on the back of my sweat-soaked head.  He pushes down, trying to force more of him into me.  I allow him to do this.  I loosen my lips and warm saliva mixed with his pre-cum leaks out of my mouth, onto his hairless groin area, then down onto the comforter.  He groans become louder. 

I move my hands from his hips to his ass and firmly grip my man.  I spread his cheeks and my index fingers find his hole and gently massage the area.  His breathing slows and his body relaxes with my ministrations.  My sucking motion also eases, to prolong the experience. 

Once we’re both more relaxed, my fingers play with his hole, pushing and releasing.  A finger dips in.  He clenches, then releases, remembering the feeling. I being to thrust, slowly, then increasing the pace.  Cole’s breathing matches my movements.  As I quicken the pace, his breaths become shorter, more rapid.  I begin to suck him again. 

His hands blindly reach out to my body, attaching to my engorged biceps. I realize he has moved into a sitting position to give him better access to my pythons. They slide over the muscles, looking to grip them, but finding only sweat.  I flex them and feel his hands slide over the muscles as they grow.  He groans some more and I feel his body begin to tense.  I insert a second finger into ass and plunge it deeply into him.  His hands fall to the bed to support his weight.

He groans go silent.  His whole body grows rigid.  I lock my lips on his unit and wiggle my fingers while they are deeply tucked in his ass.  I also lift his ass off the bed and push my mouth all the way to his body, shoving his unit further down my throat.  His hips buck into my face, but I’m used to his movement and absorb it.  I feel his load travel up his dick and gush out.  It slides down my open and eager throat.  I gulp and use my tongue to coax move out of him.  The next few shots are not as strong, but are copious and thick.  I gulp them as well and feel the load slowly slide down to my stomach.  He bucks his hips one last time and his last shot coats my mouth as I begin to withdraw.  I save the load in my mouth. 

I set his ass back down on the bed, pull my fingers from his body and watch as he falls back onto the comforter.  He has a huge smile on his face and his eyes are closed, enjoying the euphoria after the release.  I carefully move up his body and lay on top of him.  He continues to smile and puts his hands behind his head, flexing his biceps.  I bring my lips to his and kiss him, pushing some of his cum into his mouth.  He opens his eyes in surprise at tasting his own cum, but accepts it and swallows it slowly. 

We continue to gently kiss as he comes down from his high. I slide off him to one side.  I lay on my back and jerk myself to stay hard as he relaxes.  Once his breathing is normal, I feel his right hand move to my unit and get a firm grip. His movements are practiced and polished.  He knows the precise speed and pressure to apply to get me to the edge, then he slows, letting me ease back.  I close my eyes and enjoy the edging he has perfected. 

I feel him move around on the bed and his left hand is now in my groin area too, massaging my balls and taint.  His fingers softly caress the sweaty hairs under my balls and he occasionally wraps the hairs around his fingers and pulls them away from my body.  This in conjunction with his perfect jerking motion brings me to the point of no return.  I grasp at his hand to slow or stop him, to extend my pleasure, but his forearm is just as sweaty and mine, so I am not able to get a grip. 

He expertly jerks me twice more, then I feel it.  My body jerks as my first load explodes out of me and covers my hairy abs and Cole’s hand. He slows him motion, but increases the pressure of his grip.  My second and third loads get combined and when he eases his grip, they burst out and I feel them cover my chest. 

I open my eyes and see he has a huge grin.  He leans down and kisses me.  He releases my unit, pulls his hand from my balls and then wipes his cum covered hand on my hairy chest.  I move scoop some of the cum up and bring it to my mouth.  I slurp it off my fingers and smile as I swallow. 

Cole lies to my left and we stare at the ceiling, letting the euphoric afterglow wash over us.  My breathing slows, but I do my best to keep from falling asleep.  I move my left hand to his body and slowly caress his right thigh softly.  He hums. 

After a while, we make small talk, then roll over and slide off the bed.  We make our way to the bathroom and he turns the shower on.  We kiss again, our bodies melding together, slick with sweat and drying cum.  My hands over his shoulders, his hands around my lower back.  We stand and enjoy the feeling of each other’s body. 

I feel steam from the shower in the air around us and move us to the shower door.  As I open it, Cole says, “That was great Monster.  Thank you.”

I quietly respond, “Thank you Colester.  It’s just what I needed.” We step in and I move my right hand up his body to the back of his neck.  I pull his head to mine gently and we come together for another round of kissing.  Warm water begins to cascade over our bodies.

[Wrestlejock646]

Awesome seeing my two  buddies again! That was a ride and a half, too.  Thanks, Psuace, for the early Christmas present! 

[Maxum]

Wow! 

[Tjdonger]

You rock! Amazing. Thank you