m/m Deano's Summer: A Muscle University Story

[DennisFLL]

Well, thanks Mdlftr for thinking that I could be inspired by something to actually put pen to paper and write a full story!  But if anyone would be inspired, it would be from the reading of CJ's amazing work.  Clayton, you're probably blushing now, so I'll stop.

Re: Ryan - for the sake of his girlfriend and himself, I don't think he would be doing the honorable thing by marrying her.  Of course he would help raise the child.  But being honest to her and himself would be the smart course.        

[Mdlftr]

8 hours ago, DennisFLL said:

 

Re: Ryan - for the sake of his girlfriend and himself, I don't think he would be doing the honorable thing by marrying her.  Of course he would help raise the child.  But being honest to her and himself would be the smart course.        

Hmm.  I guess I'm not sure why you think marrying his pregnant girlfriend and supporting her and their child wouldn't be the honorable thing.  I think it's honorable in the sense that it is acknowledging his actions and taking responsibility for them. 

The story indicated that to all intents and purposes they were a "serious couple" in a relationship which could reasonably be expected to result in a permanent commitment.  Sleeping with someone else, while you're in that "serious relationship" is NOT an honorable thing to do.  Call it "cheating" call it "sowing his wild oats" call it "realizing his inner feelings." Ryan didn't tell his girlfriend what he was doing, while he was sleeping around.  Not very honorable.  Now he's going to "step up" and take responsibility for the resulting pregnancy.   

Otherwise, it's a case of, "Yeah babe, I know YOU thought we were exclusive. And yes, we DID have sex while YOU thought we were exclusive. I suppose you even thought we might get married or something someday.  But, hey, I was sleeping with you and ALSO with this cute underage kid whose father owns the gym I work in.  Yeah, he touched my soul.  I'm his first sexual experience and he'll always remember me.  So, anyway, I have to be "honest" to  myself.  I swing both ways, and I'm too young/handsome/with too many options to be stuck with a wife and kid, so... SEE  YA!"

That's a speech that Ryan COULD HAVE given --- but he didn't.  

 

This is just fiction, but the issues are real to a lot of people.  At the end of the day, "being honest with yourself" doesn't necessarily mean not living up to your obligations.  Ryan COULD tell her what he was doing with Deano Jr. and marry her anyway, telling her that he doesn't love her but he'll commit to his responsibilities.  Would that be the "smart course"?  I dunno.  Maybe he should just keep that little revelation to himself. 

Point:  Being "honest" with yourself is not the same as doing what you want to do. 

[DennisFLL]

Hi Mdlftr:

Ryan is not being honest because I think that it is fairly obvious to the reader that she does not know his sexuality and they are about to be married.  It would be the honorable thing to tell her he is gay (or bisexual, preferring men?) and for them to discuss the tremendous sexual and emotional frustrations this would mean for him married to her and the strain and the usual consequences that would result in the success of this marriage. Especially in current times.

My impression is that Ryan is initially planning on suppressing his sexuality, which would be dishonest to himself and to her, and in this straight marriage he would be miserable. To get some release he will cheat, which will make him unfaithful.  After a while, she will suspect what he’s doing, which will cause her hurt, all while the child is being reared and putting their marriage into severe jeopardy.

I think that his obligation is to come out to her now, begin discussing the above with her, and for him to promise to help in the rearing financially and emotionally of the child.

Dennis x

[Mdlftr]

1 hour ago, DennisFLL said:

Hi Mdlftr:

Ryan is not being honest because I think that it is fairly obvious to the reader that she does not know his sexuality and they are about to be married.  It would be the honorable thing to tell her he is gay (or bisexual, preferring men?) and for them to discuss the tremendous sexual and emotional frustrations this would mean for him married to her and the strain and the usual consequences that would result in the success of this marriage. Especially in current times.

My impression is that Ryan is initially planning on suppressing his sexuality, which would be dishonest to himself and to her, and in this straight marriage he would be miserable. To get some release he will cheat, which will make him unfaithful.  After a while, she will suspect what he’s doing, which will cause her hurt, all while the child is being reared and putting their marriage into severe jeopardy.

I think that his obligation is to come out to her now, begin discussing the above with her, and for him to promise to help in the rearing financially and emotionally of the child.

Dennis x

Dennis,

Yes, telling her about his sexual activities would be one approach, and it would have the benefit of being "full disclosure" - he wouldn't have to remember to keep silent about part of his life.  Such a disclosure could lead to a stronger relationship between the two of them, especially if Ryan still agrees to support her and the child, whether they marry or not. 

I didn't see any compelling evidence one way or another, that indicated whether Ryan was "gay" or "straight".  There's evidence for both positions.  He's 25 years old (?) Maybe he's "confused" as to who he is and what he wants in life.  A pregnant girlfriend with his baby certainly locks in some of the options.  Sure, he could try to ignore and deny it, but then his bodybuilding career, such as it could be, would be impacted.  He might decide that commitment to only her is something he desires and can do.  While I understand what you are saying about his competing sexual urges, he can be capable of making a choice and sticking with it.  His character is positively revealed in his willingness to take responsibility for his actions.  Disclosure of his sexual history could be on a range, from "all the details" to a bland statement about "past experimentation."  The next step, obviously, that she'd want to know is, "Well, what now?  Are we exclusive or not?"   That's the discussion Ryan and his girlfriend should have.

Mdlftr 

 

 

 

 

[DennisFLL]

Mdlftr:

I think our discussion has come down to what Ryan should be doing based on whether he is gay or straight.  It seemed to me that he was very much taken by Deano and that the only reason Ryan could not see Deano anymore was because of his girlfriend’s pregnancy and their need to get married as a result.  If Ryan is straight, as you suggest he could be, and he truly loves her enough to marry her, then there’s nothing more to say here.  But it just looks to me that Ryan’s sexual orientation was revealed in his strong feelings for Deano, and he was giving up his relationship with Deano purely based on the thinking that his society’s culture would demand he marry his girlfriend under the circumstances.

Dennis

[Mdlftr]

On 9/29/2020 at 8:23 AM, DennisFLL said:

Mdlftr:

I think our discussion has come down to what Ryan should be doing based on whether he is gay or straight.  It seemed to me that he was very much taken by Deano and that the only reason Ryan could not see Deano anymore was because of his girlfriend’s pregnancy and their need to get married as a result.  If Ryan is straight, as you suggest he could be, and he truly loves her enough to marry her, then there’s nothing more to say here.  But it just looks to me that Ryan’s sexual orientation was revealed in his strong feelings for Deano, and he was giving up his relationship with Deano purely based on the thinking that his society’s culture would demand he marry his girlfriend under the circumstances.

Dennis

Dennis,  

I agree that Ryan is probably going to marry the girlfriend based on a strong sense of societal obligation.  That obligation has the "step up and do the right thing" ethos in it, so I can understand Ryan's compulsion/coercion by society to do that.  On the other hand, I question whether his relationship with Deano would have ever been anything more than a summer fling,  It happened quickly, at a point where Ryan was getting bored with his girlfriend.  "Any port in a storm"  seems to me to have been the operative word here.  If Ryan was gay, wouldn't there have been some discussion/evidence of it before Deano?  Did they say that?  I don't recall that being discussed, other than "in the moment" with Deano it was great.   I don't think Ryan's actions are so determined by whether he's gay, straight or bi.  I think if he were gay, he would be very much less likely to be in a physical relationship with a girl - not impossible, just much less likely.  I suspect he's bi, with a stronger propensity for women over men.  If he were gay, it seems that he would have had less of a physical relationship with a girl, especially if it were just as a cover for his career.  He would have "been saving himself for marriage" or "respecting her" rather than have sex.  I think he's bisexual.  Regardless, he now has to make a decision and do what he thinks is right.  In the circumstances, given his career aspirations as a bodybuilder, his living conditions, his family and society, he doesn't have much choice but to marry her.  It may be a coerced choice, but it's one he's making.  I think poor Deano was never in the long term picture.  His emotions and feelings (first love!) are collateral damage.  He and Ryan would have not gone on much past the summer.   

[DennisFLL]

You may be totally right on the issues we're discussing, and you're points are well taken.  But still, how many shot-gun marriages that you know of were really happy and truly successful?  CJ alluded to a Ryan prequel which might supply us answers to some of the questions we've been throwing around. 

[Mdlftr]

Shot gun marriage success rates?  Probably until they get out of shooting range! LOL!

Ryan prequel - hmm, that might answer questions about his sex life - or  the variety of it!

muscleaddict  -- to turn to you, the author, for a moment:  I'm sure you think we're nuts, obsessively discussing Ryan's motivations.  On the other hand, take it as a compliment to your creative writing - it inspired your readers!

Mdlftr

[muscleaddict]

On 9/29/2020 at 11:33 PM, Mdlftr said:

Shot gun marriage success rates?  Probably until they get out of shooting range! LOL!

Ryan prequel - hmm, that might answer questions about his sex life - or  the variety of it!

muscleaddict  -- to turn to you, the author, for a moment:  I'm sure you think we're nuts, obsessively discussing Ryan's motivations.  On the other hand, take it as a compliment to your creative writing - it inspired your readers!

Mdlftr

Haha! No, mate - I absolutely take it as a compliment that people are discussing and analysing my characters. To pick up on a few points and let you know some of the thoughts I've had about the Ryan character - he is bisexual, like Deano and AJ but I feel like he's only ever had relationships with girls. Not necessarily because he has a female preference but probably because it's been easier for him to meet girls and have those relationships. Like Deano he's in a very straight world, surrounding by very masculine, heterosexual bodybuilders. He was probably "one of the lads" at school and being so good looking has always had girls interested in him.

Him being bisexual and attracted to guys is something he mostly keeps to himself. Kind of like a secret hidden side that no one knows about. Probably not out of shame or any kind of internalised homophobia but just because he *can* keep it hidden and it's just easier that way! Like Deano and Woody and other bodybuilders there's also no doubt the fear of people not accepting him. But I also feel like a part of him probably *likes* the fact that he has this secret attraction to guys that not many people know about. Almost likes he gets a kick out of the fact that he's a bit different?

As for he and Katie, I haven't really thought about the details but I've already had the thought that they won't last long. Obviously they have a kid though (who Ryan will obviously adore and be an amazing dad to) so they'll always be in each others lives.

I like to think Ryan will eventually meet a guy (no doubt another bodybuilder) and have a relationship with him. Then he'll have to face the issues of coming out - to Katie (if she doesn't know already) and his family and fellow bodybuilding mates. Maybe *that* should be the spin-off instead of a prequel? Fast forward a few years and have Ryan fall in love with a guy, while Deano's a famous professional 212 bodybuilder living in the States with his own bodybuilder boyfriend! 

[muscleaddict]

7 minutes ago, muscleaddict said:

Haha! No, mate - I absolutely take it as a compliment that people are discussing and analysing my characters. To pick up on a few points and let you know some of the thoughts I've had about the Ryan character - he is bisexual, like Deano and AJ but I feel like he's only ever had relationships with girls. Not necessarily because he has a female preference but probably because it's been easier for him to meet girls and have those relationships. Like Deano he's in a very straight world, surrounding by very masculine, heterosexual bodybuilders. He was probably "one of the lads" at school and being so good looking always had girls interested in him.

Him being bisexual and attracted to guys is something he mostly keeps to himself. Kind of like a secret hidden side that no one knows about. Probably not out of shame or any kind of internalised homophobia but just because he *can* keep it hidden and it's just easier that way! Like Deano and Woody and other bodybuilders there's also no doubt the fear of people not accepting him. But I also feel like a part of him probably *likes* the fact that he has this secret attraction to guys that not many people know about. Almost likes he gets a kick out of the fact that he's a bit different?

As for he and Katie, I haven't really thought about the details but I've already had the thought that they won't last long. Obviously they have a kid though (who Ryan will obviously adore and be an amazing dad to) so they'll always be in each others lives.

I like to think Ryan will eventually meet a guy (no doubt another bodybuilder) and have a relationship with him. Then he'll have to face the issues of coming out - to Katie (if she doesn't know already) and his family and fellow bodybuilding mates. Maybe *that* should be the spin-off instead of a prequel? Fast forward a few years and have Ryan fall in love with a guy, while Deano's a famous professional 212 bodybuilder living in the States with his own bodybuilder boyfriend!