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Ozzie & Deano: A Short Muscle University Story


muscleaddict

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"Targuin?" - Sorry guys, a Yank like me is a little lost here.  Is that a name unique to the upper class?  I'm curious about the backstory on that.  Bridging the Atlantic with this one.

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3 hours ago, muscleaddict said:

@Mdlftr - this is brilliant!! I love it! Not only is it completely accurate but I also laughed out loud reading it. 12, 13 and 15 in particular made me laugh (poor Deano 😂)! 

To answer your question - I have genuinely never heard or known of a posh, upper class British bodybuilder! Certainly not a well known one anyway. This is REAL LIFE bodybuilders by the way, we can't forget about super spoilt rich kid Woody (who I don't really envision him to be that posh anyway). Loving the suggestion of a toffee-nosed posh boy called Tarquin or Hugo who uses his 60k monthly allowance on the best steroids in London crashing into MU and making an enemy of Deano. Mummy and daddy both had affairs and fucked him up when he was a kid so now out of guilt, they let him run riot and do whatever he likes. If that means paying for him to go to the only school in the world that turns its students into nightmarish mountains of muscle to spend all day eating lifting and posing in shiny pants then so be it. 

So, in modern parlance, you're saying that "Tarquin the tank-the-toffee-nosed-git-bodybuilder" has "Mummy-and-Daddy" issues?!!

What??!  Are you saying that all that money PLUS a title, PLUS loads of monetary resources MINUS parental time and attention = "Messed up"?

How about a huge overwhelming sense of entitlement, snobbyness and judgement of other non-aristo lads?  That begs the question of who he would hang out with at school,, if he's such a prat?!!?

=> He ends up rooming with Deano after a freak storm destroys a dorm and they have to double people up!  Nothing like living in close quarters with an absolute JERK to make a semester memorable!!

I can just see it now,,,,,,!

 

Sort of like THIS:  

"You're sleeping on the floor tonight, DEANO!"

image.jpeg.cb38087d51668d4e04e26fe00d2275b5.jpeg

 

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21 hours ago, crushme99 said:

"Targuin?" - Sorry guys, a Yank like me is a little lost here.  Is that a name unique to the upper class?  I'm curious about the backstory on that.  Bridging the Atlantic with this one.

Tarquin is a typical posh boy name here in the UK. Like Rupert, Hugo, Sebastian (hi Woody), Charles. 

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1 hour ago, muscleaddict said:

Tarquin is a typical posh boy name here in the UK. Like Rupert, Hugo, Sebastian (hi Woody), Charles. 

...Cuthbert,  Tristram, Barnaby. 

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On 8/15/2022 at 9:33 PM, Mdlftr said:

So, in modern parlance, you're saying that "Tarquin the tank-the-toffee-nosed-git-bodybuilder" has "Mummy-and-Daddy" issues?!!

What??!  Are you saying that all that money PLUS a title, PLUS loads of monetary resources MINUS parental time and attention = "Messed up"?

How about a huge overwhelming sense of entitlement, snobbyness and judgement of other non-aristo lads?  That begs the question of who he would hang out with at school,, if he's such a prat?!!?

=> He ends up rooming with Deano after a freak storm destroys a dorm and they have to double people up!  Nothing like living in close quarters with an absolute JERK to make a semester memorable!!

I can just see it now,,,,,,!

 

Sort of like THIS:  

"You're sleeping on the floor tonight, DEANO!"

image.jpeg.cb38087d51668d4e04e26fe00d2275b5.jpeg

 

That's right, mate. Pretty groundbreaking stuff, right? We're really breaking down stereotypes here. I'm pretty sure he'd try and break into Deano's friend group since they're the biggest lads in the year and what with Deano being his new roommate and everything, which might include a bit of bribery. Buying all the drinks at the SU bar. Inviting them all out to Dubai to stay in one of daddy's many properties, including a fully funded trip to Thailand to take all of those legal drugs and get properly jacked like European and Aussie bodybuilders sometimes do. Deano gets on the plane to find two unexpected guests...Woody (Tarquin's dad and his dad have done business together in the past) and his now much bigger boyfriend Luke. (For FUCK'S sake). *Spends whole plane journey sulking and doing the Deano Cheek Poke while wearing his skinny jeans*

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<snip>

Inviting them all out to Dubai to stay in one of daddy's many properties, including a fully funded trip to Thailand to take all of those legal drugs and get properly jacked like European and Aussie bodybuilders sometimes do. Deano gets on the plane to find two unexpected guests...Woody (Tarquin's dad and his dad have done business together in the past) and his now much bigger boyfriend Luke. (For FUCK'S sake). *Spends whole plane journey sulking and doing the Deano Cheek Poke while wearing his skinny jeans*

<snip>

I can see the Netflix series now! 

Can you IMAGINE the auditions for the "Deano Cheek Poke"?? !! LOL  The mind reels!!

 

 

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Somewhat off topic, but since we're discussing British boy's names:

  • The name Tarquin is boy's name . One of the few ancient Roman names that doesn't end in us, the rarely heard Tarquin has a decidedly creative, even dramatic flair, which could appeal to the parent looking for a strikingly original name.

Tarquin - Baby Name Meaning, Origin, and Popularity  

 

  • Is Tarquin a posh name?

Tarquin, Rupert etc are posh IMO. Some if the names I think of as being 'posh' are actually relatively normal and not OTT.Oct 30, 2014

question- what are "posh" names? 95 - Mumsnet

  • Famous People Named Tarquin

Tarquin the Elderlegendary king of Rome.
Tarquin the Proudlegendary king of Rome.
(Simon) Tarquin OlivierEnglish actor and producer; son of Laurence Olivier.
Tarquin HallEnglish novelist and journalist.
Timothy Tarquin HuttonAmerican actor.

  • What is the most popular British boy name?

Oliver
Oliver and Olivia remained the most popular names for boys and girls in England and Wales in 2020 for the fifth consecutive year. Ivy and Rosie replaced Grace and Freya in the top 10 girls' names, while Archie replaced Charlie in the top 10 boys' names.Oct 18, 2021

https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/livebirths/bulletins/babynamesenglandandwales/2020 

 

image.jpeg.cb03eef84f4d3e4f8f1764ab44be1549.jpeg

Hmmm.  While adorable, I don't quite see "Oliver" as the name of a student at Muscle University.  Maybe I'm wrong...........?

 

LOL

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